


Bring Her Home

by NVale



Category: The Martian (2015), The Martian - All Media Types
Genre: Cross-Posted on Quotev, Eventual Romance, F/M, Fluff, Humor, Reader-Insert, Stuck on mars
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2020-06-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:40:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 26
Words: 45,383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24394411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NVale/pseuds/NVale
Summary: (Name) (Last Name) was chosen to be the Botanist in the Ares III mission for NASA. The mission was supposed to be a month-long time period for the six astronauts but when a storm hits them hard on the surface of Mars, the crew are left 111.92 light-years away from Earth with orders to abandon the mission. But life isn't so simple, even for life on Mars and (Name) (Last Name) is declared dead and stranded alone on a desolate planet. What is she to do now facing life all alone? How is she going to live to see another day on Earth? How will the world react when they find out that she's actually alive after her 'supposed' death? Let's find out!
Relationships: Chris Beck/Reader, Doctor Beck/Reader
Comments: 19
Kudos: 40





	1. Intro

Welcome to my new story!!!

So excited, I love the movie 'The Martian' and I'm so happy that you like it too because why else would you be here? 

Anyways, I'm happy that you took the time to click on this fanfic of mine and I hope that you like it as much as I did writing it. 

Just to start, this is a Chris Beck X Reader, because who doesn't like that handsome doctor of a man? But first, there need to be some things that need to be addressed so that you don't get confused: 

  * The reader will be replacing Mark Watney. They are the Botanist on the ship. 
  * Beth Johanssen is not included in this fanfic, I have nothing against here but this is a love story between the reader and Chris Beck. So yeah, she's out of the picture, but I did replace her with Johnson, which is basically Mark Watney but playing her part as the technician.
  * The Reader has a sibling, not really gonna specify what gender but you do! At least in this book, you do. Details will be given at a later point in the story. 
  * General Background Info: The reader and Beck had a relationship before the Ares III launch but broke it off after they were selected as the astronauts for the mission.   
But yeah, that's mostly the important things of this story, I hope you enjoy it and think of leaving me a comment or two to let me know. I love to read your comments. 



Have a nice day and I hope you enjoy the story!!!!


	2. The Calm Before the Storm

**Sol 18:**

I was standing on Mars, it was a dream come true. I had gone through years of training to get to this moment. I felt the heat from the sun hit my suit and smiled, it was nice and peaceful…

“All right, team. Stay in sight of each other. Let’s make NASA proud.” Commander Lewis ordered as I was chipping at a section of rocks and recording the observations on the computer on my arm.

“Well, you’ll be happy to know that today in grid section fourteen twenty-eight, the particles appear predominantly “coarse,” but as we move to twenty-nine the particles are much finer, and should be ideal for chem analysis.” I said jokingly.

I heard Johnson, my bestest friend in the whole of Mars snort. “Hear that, everyone?”

“(Name) just discovered ‘dirt.’ Alert the media” Martinez, my second best friend on the crew laugh. I could practically hear him rolling his eyes at my antics.

“What’s your job today, Martinez? Confirming the MAV is still upright?” Johnson asked sarcastically.

“Visual inspection of equipment is imperative to mission success.” Martinez said and I looked over to the MAV, “I would also like to add that ’The MAV is still upright.’” And I started laughing.

“Hey, you keep leaving your channel open (Last Name)…” Doctor Beck said.

“Which leads to Martinez and Johnson responding, which leads to us listening, which leads to me being annoyed.” Commander Lewis said agitatedly.

“Crap, sorry…” I apologized.

“Martinez, Commander Lewis would like you to please shut your smart mouth.” Johnson said.

“Like you’re one to talk.”

Beck spoke up, “We would prefer you use a different adjective to describe Martinez’s mouth.”

I let out a small gasp and started laughing at the insult Beck just said.

“Did Beck just insult me?” Martinez asked shocked.

“ _Doctor_ Beck. And yes.”

Johnson and I were laughing too hard to actually respond to the funny interaction.

“Johnson, shut ‘em off.” Lewis said and I stood up quickly, “Commander, constant communication is the hallmark of a –” I stopped when I heard the click and the radios go silent.

I started waving my arms to the commander in anger before sighing and finishing up my task.

“I apologize for my countrymen, Vogel.” Lewis said as she glanced at the male beside her.

“Accepted. How many samples do we need, Commander?”

“Seven. One hundred grams each. Drill at least thirty centimeters down.”

The two of them use a specimen drill to boreholes in the ground.

Inside the HAB, Johnson frowns not being able to talk to (Name) but then notices a Mission Update from Houston. He opens it and grows pale while looking at it, “Uh…Commander? You should come inside. You’re going to want to see this.”

Lewis tenses as she hears Johnson’s voice, “What is it?”

“We got a mission update. Storm Warning.”

“I saw the warning in the morning briefing. We’ll be inside long before it hits.”

“I don’t think so. They’ve upgraded their estimate. The storm’s gonna be worse.”

Lewis looks up to the sky and sees that the storm that was at the horizon darkens forebodingly.

I watch as the dirt in front of me starts to blow in the incoming wind…

* * *

All of us enter, everyone was tense this was not good news.

“…Twelve-hundred kilometers in diameter, bearing 24.41 degrees…” Lewis states looking at the report.

“That’s tracking right towards us.” Johnson adds.

“…And based on current escalation, estimate a force of…Eighty-six hundred Newtons.”

(Holy shit) My eyes widened, this storm is going to be really, really bad. “What’s Abort Force?”

“Seventy-five hundred.” Beck says, he was standing right next to me.

“Anything above that and the MAV could tip.” Martinez said.

“We’re scrubbed?” Vogel asked as everyone looked at Commander Lewis.

“Begin abort procedures.’” She read off and I had felt so sad, all this work and everything and now we have to leave. I knew that everyone was so excited about this mission and for it to now go to waste, it sucked.

“Maybe it won’t be as bad as they say?” Martinez asked, hopeful.

“They’re estimating with a margin of error. We can wait it out.” Vogel said and I nodded quickly, “Yeah, let’s wait it out.”

Lewis thinks for a moment, her mind racing considering all the options.

“Commander?” Johnson asks.

“Prep for emergency departure.” She orders and I frown. “ _Commander, please.”_ I begged.

“We’re scrubbed. And that’s an order.” Is all she states.

* * *

Not ten minutes later the storm hits us. The high winds slam into us as we exit the airlock. We struggled to stay on our feet and fought through the punishing storm. The wind was wailing against us and I grunted at the effort of moving through it.

“Visibility is almost zero. If you get lost, home in on my suit’s telemetry. The wind’s gonna be rougher away from the HAB, so be ready.

The sand continues to hit me as I take another step after agonizing step towards the MAV. It’s brutal; we have to fight for every inch. And then an idea hits me, “Hey, maybe we could shore up the MAV. Make tipping less likely.” I said.

“How?”

“We could use cables from the solar farm as guy lines.” I pause to take a breather and taking another step, “The rovers could be anchors. The trick would be getting around the—” I couldn’t talk as suddenly something slammed into me I heaved as my air was taken away. It grew dark and suddenly I was out.

“(NAME)!!” Johnson cried as he watched as (Name) was hit by something massive and yanked away into the storm.

No one could believe it. It happened so fast, one second she was there…and then she was gone.

“What happened?!” Lewis yelled as she turned to look at where (Name) once was.

“Something hit her—(Name)!” Johnson felt tears prickling at his eyes.

“(Last Name), report—” Lewis commanded and felt her blood run cold as there was no reply. “(LAST NAME), REPORT!” She yelled.

Johnson was frantically searching at the computer, “She’s offline. I don’t know where she is-“

“—Commander, before we lost telemetry, her decompression alarm went off—” Beck said, he felt horrible for saying that she might be…

“Shit! Johnson where did you last see her?” Lewis said, looking at the said male.

His eyes were wide, “She was right in front of me, and then she was gone. She flew off due west.” He said fearfully.

Lewis surveyed the surroundings, visibility was near zero. She could barely even see the crew around her, she tries to keep her heart from pounding out of her chest. “Okay…okay…Martinez, get to the MAV and prep for launch. Everyone else, home in on Johnson.” She ordered.

Johnson stumbles, “I can’t see anything…” But his mind was racing to the second that (Name) was in front of him. The noise she made before she was taken, it was haunting him.

“Doctor Beck! How long can a person survive decompression?” Vogel asked in fear.

Beck grimaced, “Less than a minute.”

“Line up and walk west. Small steps, she’s probably prone. We don’t want to step over her.” Lewis said as the group fought through the chaos.

Martinez dives into the airlock and forces the door close. He waits for the agonizing seconds as it pressurizes and once it does he races up the ladder, slides into the pilot’s seat, and boots the system. “Commander—the MAV’s got an 8-degree tilt. It’ll tip at 12.3.—” He says worriedly.

“Copy that.” Lewis states and Beck checks the readout on his arm computer. “Johnson, (Last Name)'s bio-monitor sent something before going offline. My computer just says “Bad Packet”

“It didn’t finish transmitting.” He said, looking at his computer and trembles. “BP 0, PR 0, TP 36.2.”

“Copy.” Beck said and from a doctor’s point of view, he understood. “Blood pressure zero, pulse rate zero. Temperature normal.” He shut his eyes.

“Temperature normal?” Lewis asked.

“It takes a while for the…it takes a while for the body to cool.” He said softly.

Everyone freezes as they digest the news.

“NO! She isn’t-!” Johnson yells but is cut off by Martinez, “Commander, tilting at 10.5 degrees now, with gusts pushing it to 11.”

“Copy. If it tips, can you launch before it completely falls over?” She asks and hears Martinez intake sharply.

“Uh, yes, ma’am. I could take manual control.” He says hesitantly.

“Copy that. Everyone home in on Martinez’s suit. That’ll get you to the airlock. Get in and prep for launch.” She ordered and could hear Johnson start to argue.

“What about you, Commander?” Vogel asked.

“I’m searching a little more. Get moving. Martinez, if you start to top, launch.”

“You really think I’m going to leave you behind?” He asked he couldn’t lose someone else too.

“I just ordered you to. You three, get to the ship.” But glares when they hesitate. “ _GO!”_ Beck grabs Johnson and starts to drag him.

The three crew members stumble into the airlock and Johnson fought Beck all the way, “How could you?! She’s still out there, we have to find her!” He yells.

Lewis looks around frantically but she could see a thing in any direction. (Come on, think, Melissa, think…) She reaches into the pack on her back and removes two of the one-meter drill bits she was using earlier to take samples. She holds one in each hand, dragging them on the ground as she trudges through the sand. “Johnson, would the rover IR camera do any good?”

Johnson feels crestfallen, “Negative, IR can’t get through sand any better than visual light.” He rips off his helmet as the three men scrambled up the ladder.

“What’s she thinking, she’s a geologist. She knows IR can’t get through a sandstorm.” Beck asks in full doctor/scientist mode.

“She’s grasping, for anything.” Vogel responds.

“Commander, we’re tilting 11.6 degrees. One good gust and we’re tipping.” Martinez states.

“What about the proximity radar? Could it detect (Last Name)'s suit?” She asks hopefully.

“No way, It’s made to see Hermes in orbit, not the metal in a single suit.”

“Copy, give it a try.” Lewis states.

Beck slides into his acceleration couch, “Commander, I know you don’t want to hear this, but (Last Name)…(Name)'s dead.”

Johnson shut his eyes, crying, “(Name)…” He whimpers.

“Copy, Martinez, try the radar.”

“Roger.” Martinez tries the radar and glares at Beck, “What is wrong with you. She’s…”

“She’s dead. My friend just died. I don’t want my Commander to die as well.” Beck says.

Lewis fights her way through the storm. “Negative contact on proximity radar.” Martinez shakes his head.

“Nothing?” Lewis gasps out.

“It can barely see the Hab. There’s not enough met—” He’s cut off when a loud screeching was heard. The MAB lurches as it begins to tip. “Strap in! We’re tipping!” He yells.

“13 degrees, we’re past balance. We’ll never rock back.” Vogel exclaims.

“Let it tip, we can’t leave Commander.” Beck argues.

“We’ll never be able to fix it if it tips. I got one trick left, then I’m following orders.” Martinez states as he fires the thrusters to fight against the slow tilt. “C’mon…c’mon.”

“12.9 degrees.” Vogel says looking at the monitor.

“Commander. You need to get back to the ship. NOW! She’s dead!” Beck yells and everyone shuts up. Johnson started crying, “(Name)…”

Lewis stands alone in the storm, she stares at the darkness all around her. Her shoulders slump, “Copy. On my way.” ((Name)…)

Lewis slams the airlock door shut and tears off her suit before making her way to the flight cabin. She doesn’t say a word as she straps herself in her seat. Nobody says anything until. “Still at pilot release. Ready for launch.”

Lewis closes her eyes and nods.

“I’m sorry, Commander. You need to verbally.” Martinez starts.

“Launch.” Lewis states, her voice cracking slightly in defeat. The engine ignites and there off.

Johnson stares at the empty seat, his body trembling.

She was gone.


	3. The Reality of the Situation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Having realized that she did not die on Sol 19, (Name) now has to face the reality that she is now stranded on Mars, all alone. How will she cope?

( **Warning: There is a very violent scene in this chapter involving blood and life-threatening injury. If squeamish, please do not read. You have been warned)**

Theodore “Teddy” Sanders, Director of NASA, steels himself before he steps to the podium. Normally, he leaves these briefings to his press security but today was different. He opens a red folder.

“At around 4:30 a.m., central standard time, our satellites detected a storm approaching the Ares 3 mission site on Mars. By 6:45, the storm had escalated to “severe” and we had no choice but to abort the mission. Thanks to the quick action of Commander Lewis, astronauts Beck, Johnson, Martinez, and Vogel were able to reach the Mars Ascent Vehicle and perform an emergency launch at 7:28 central time. Unfortunately, during the evacuation, Astronaut [Name] [Last Name] was struck by debris and killed. Commander Lewis and the rest of her team were able to intercept safely with the Hermes and are now heading home…But [Name] [Last Name] is dead.” He finishes and the press erupts with questions.

* * *

**Sol 19:**

There were clear skies on the surface of Mars again as if there was no dangerous storm that killed someone. But there was a loud alarm going off, “ARRR…ARRR…ARRR…”

A singular body laid facedown, half-covered in red sand at the base of a hill. The nametag was out saying:

“[Last Name].”

The oxygen alarm inside the helmet continues to blare. And just as it builds into a crescendo…

My eyes widened, gasping for air. I jerk, feeling my body twitch as I’m coming back into consciousness. The world was spinning, and the alarm is blaring inside my helmet. I can’t move…I can’t…

A scream is stolen from me before I can realize, it hurts…Oh God, the pain is unlike anything I’ve ever felt before, I look down and see a jagged piece of antenna has pierced through my suit and stabbed me straight through my abdomen. Blood was surrounding it but it seemed to have clotted the material, the alarm was stopping.

My training kicked in—the suit was breached. I unceremoniously struggle to get on my knees. I gasp in pain as the antenna is jolted and look to see it tangled with some wires. I reach for the side of my helmet to get the multitool and cut the wire.

I can finally stand up and I slowly limp my way over the hill and I could see the Hab, it was still intact even though it was a little battered. My eyes go over to the MAV launch site…

Empty.

I have tears prickling at my eyes but I bit my lip, I have to go.

After some horrible walking, I finally fumbled my way into the airlock. As soon as the airlock equalizes, I tear my helmet off. I nearly fall into the main area, unknowingly that my computer started recording as soon as the door opened.

I tear off my space suit and look down at the antenna inside of me. I shut my eyes, taking quick breaths as if I was hyperventilating and grabbed the piece of metal, and tore it out of my body.

I cried, my throat raw as I screamed, I could hear the sound that the antenna made as it ripped my skin and the squelch of my blood. I had tears running down my cheeks as I dropped the piece of metal and pressed onto the wound. My hand became covered in blood and I felt swaying at a large amount of blood loss as I rushed to Medical to get supplies. Before I sat down I started to cut my shirt off I looked down at the puncture wound and then the antenna, there’s a piece of it still inside me.

“Fuck…” I gasp, as I scramble for the first-aid station, grabbing a box with my bloodied hand and throwing supplies, anesthetic, syringe, forceps, medical staple gun. I whimper (It’s not going to be easy to watch. My legs feel like jelly and my eyesight is becoming blurry.)

I could feel the sweat pouring off my eyebrow as I load up the syringe with the anesthetic. I bit my lower lip and inject it into the puncture wound. I let out a pained squeal and grab the forceps. I look at it trembling.

(Please god…I don’t want to do this.) I inhale and shove the forceps into my wound. I didn’t realize the cry I let out, my body becoming limp as I nearly lose consciousness. My hand that’s limp at my side twitches.

(Don’t pass out…whatever you do, don’t pass out, [Name].)

I grab the forceps, grimacing in agony. I can’t find it, where is it? I push the forceps deeper. And deeper. I know by now I’m pale as a ghost and I look at the mirror at how deep the wound is. And then I find it, I yank the forceps free and see the small piece of shrapnel.

“Hallelujah…” I gasp, my voice hoarse and damaged from the screaming as I slam it to the metal tray beside me and grab the wipes to clean my wound. The blood rushes out quickly, I’m going to die. I’m going to bleed out. I grab the staple gun and staple my wound shut. My eyes shut as I moan quietly in agony as I all but collapse into the chair trying, trying so hard to breathe.

And then it hits me.

I start trembling harder and harder as I cry. I try to wipe my tears but they’re pouring out.

I’m left for dead…all by myself.

I weep without shame, the only human on the planet.

“Fuck.”

* * *

I finally collect myself as I wrap my wound with bandages, I go to the sink and wash my hands that are caked in blood. I’m trembling, and I’m wobbling as my legs could hardly hold my weight. After the water didn’t turn red I pressed my hands to my face wiping it clean. I looked at the mirror and winced seeing the pale complexion on my skin, my eyes red and puffy from the crying. I had dark bags under my eyes and my skin was freezing. The adrenaline was coming down the aftershock was setting in.

I grabbed the blanket off the medical bed and wrapped myself in it, I wasn’t even going to put a shirt on, it was just going to end badly. After taking some deep breaths and grabbing a small water bottle to rehydrate myself.

My fingers trembled and I clutched the blanket for dear life. I headed towards my desk to see the camera recording already. I looked at it for a moment before remembering that I set it to record anytime the door was opened from the outside. NASA told me to do it so they could see us. I slowly peeked into the frame and adjusted the camera slightly to start a video journal.

“Okay, okay…” I say softly, my throat irritated and I cough slightly and see some blood on my hand. I sigh deeply and then the immediate moment I sat down I was ready to hurl. I grabbed a bucket and narrowly threw up bile and spit and…

I whined as I saw the majority that came up was blood.

“That’s…not good.” I whimper as I wiped the excess blood from my lip with a small napkin. “What does it mean when you throw up blood? It’s a least 100 grams…” I ask softly to myself and getting up again to clean the bucket and go back to the chair sitting down. I looked at the screen to see that it was working, it’s been recording for the last 25 minutes.

“This is…[Name] [Last Name]. Astronaut. I am entering this log for the record, in case I…” I take a deep breath and looking into the camera with a sad smile, “I don’t make it…I’m sure it recorded most, if not all that happened when I came in. It’s 6:53 on sol 19. And…I’m still alive.”

I pause to think. “Obviously, I’m guessing I’m going to surprise my crewmates. And NASA. And…the world…So…Surprise.” I laugh weakly. “I didn’t die on Sol 18, best I can tell-“I hold up the piece of antenna that I had piercing me before. “—This length of our primary communications antenna made a hole into my spacesuit…And ripped a hole in me as well. It was horrible thank you for asking. But the antenna and the blood really managed to seal the breach in my suit. Which kept me alive, but the breach must have set off the alarm on my bio-monitor, Doctor Beck, and the Commander made the call that I was dead.”

I paused slightly fisting my hand looking at the camera, “Look…Lewis, Beck…if you ever hear this…just listen. It wasn’t your fault; it wasn’t anyone’s fault. Just bad luck.” I inhaled sharply as I cried, tears slowly running down my face, “You did what you had to do, and if I was in your position, I would have done the same. I’m just so happy that you made it out.” I smiled, wiping my tears.

“I’m so happy that you made it out safely. Thank God…” I wept and slowly calmed down. I drank a bit of water, “All right, though. That’s where we’re at. [Name] [Last Name], stranded on Mars. I have no way to contact NASA because our communication antenna broke and stabbed me in the stomach. Which we’ve covered. And even if I could, it will take…four years before the next manned mission gets here. And I’m in a Hab designed to last thirty-one days.”

I sat back, sighing in defeat and started listing off the horrible things that can happen, “If the oxygenator breaks, I’ll suffocate. If the water reclaimer breaks, I’ll die of thirst. If the Hab breaches, I’ll just sort of…implode. And if, by some miracle, none of that happens...eventually going to run out of food. So…yeah.” I trailed off, looking at the ceiling.

It’s one thing to know it. It’s another to say it aloud.

“Yeah.”

I shut the camera off and curled up as much as I could with an injury on my bed. I looked at the dim light on my desk just thinking.

I didn’t get much sleep that night.


	4. Staying Alive (By Blowing Myself Up)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (Name), now figuring a way for her to stay alive realizes that she needs to make food. An easy task for a botanist, but now having to face the problem of not having enough water.
> 
> Well, she'll have to make enough water, won't she? Let's just hope the explosion doesn't do too much damage.

**Sol 21:**

After spending the entirety of sol 20 sleeping fruitlessly with the nightmares and horror of my situation. I searched through my belongings getting on some comfier clothes. I looked through some of the pictures that I had, smiling as I was reminiscing. At the bottom of my box, I found two pictures, it really brought tears to my eyes. One of them was a photo I had taken with my family the day that I was told that I was going to be second-in-command. My parents stood beside me with giant smiles and my sibling had their hand on my head, something that always bothered me. And now, it was something that I miss.

I looked over to the second photo in my hand, it was a more private photo that was taken no more than two years ago. In the photo it was me and Chris Beck, it was on a trip to the mountains, he and I were laughing and he gave me a small kiss on the check. I completely forgot about this photo after everything that happened with our training.

“I’m not going to die up here.” I said as I stared at the photos. I taped them next to my bunk, the one with me and Beck was hidden from the camera and I made sure that I got another photo with the rest of the crew that I found and taped it as a motivator so that I had something to always push me forward to one day see them again.

I got out of bed and went to the bathroom. The toilet flushed, and it began the procedure to vacuum drying the waste. I glance at the system and let out a small hum.

The system finishes its process, sealing the waste into—

A silver bag.

I look at the bag and an idea started to form.

* * *

I sat down at the kitchenette checking inventory. I removed all of the ration packs, stacking them in orderly piles as I wrote down how much of each ration we had. I remembered that Lewis moved one for Thanksgiving, I got up and looked for it before finding a white container labeled: DO NOT OPEN UNTIL THANKSGIVING.

And I scrounged through its content before finding a vacuum-sealed bag of potatoes. I gasped in delight and left the container on the counter and rushed to my station grabbing a pencil and some paper and the manual I had.

(If I don’t do anything then I’ve already lost. And I won’t lose, not when I survived.)

It was back to the basics. I started writing math equations for hours.

* * *

**Sol 21**

I sat down on the chair, wearing my favorite blue NASA long-sleeved shirt. “Let’s do the math…” I state and look at my image, I looked less-terrible than I did before, that’s for sure.

“Our surface mission here was supposed to take thirty-one sols. For redundancy, they sent enough food to last for sixty-eight days. For six people. So for just me, it’ll last three-hundred days. And I figure I can stretch it that to four hundred if I ration.” I stopped to eat some cereal. “So…I’ve still gotta figure out how to grow three years' worth of food. Here. On a planet where nothing grows.”

I pause and gave a celebratory grin as I grabbed my mission brief and point to the word “Botanist” under “(Last Name).”

“Mars will come to fear my botany powers!” I laughed childishly and ended the log. I threw on my spare space suit and after making a ton of room in the Hab. I cleared the space out. I put everything on rollers and brought them outside and grabbed the Hazard container and started getting the silver bags out and when I was done, I carried it inside. I also made sure that the solar panels were cleaned so that they Hab had power.

I stood in the kitchen, surrounded by small silver bags and I was filling a container with water from the Reclaimer. I frowned, “I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to do this.” I repeated as I plugged my nose in and tearing open a bag and dumping the contents into the bin. I tear another one, “Johnson, Jesus.” I said, as I dumped it into the bin and started mixing it with the water and gagged.

* * *

**Sol 22:**

I made some hot chocolate and eating some breakfast because it was nearly 8 in the morning. I groaned in pain as I took off part of my suit and pressed a hand to my wound. I lifted a hand covered in blood on my fingertips and waved it t the camera, “Staple came out.”

* * *

**Sol 24:**

I was outside again and I was using the shovel to get dirt into the container and when it was filled I brought it to the airlock. As I entered the Hab, I dump the container of dirt into a corner where I cleared away a couple of days ago.

* * *

**Sole 28:**

I started to spread the dirt over a third of the Hab floor but I sat down drinking water from my bottle, feeling exhausted. I looked over to the compost bin and wanted to cry. I sighed standing up and taking a large breath and opened the bin and started dumping it over the Martian dirt.

I winced feeling my lungs about to burst and I breathe eventually. I coughed, oh god, that’s horrible.

* * *

**Sol 31:**

I sat down at the kitchen cutting the potatoes in halves until all the potatoes were cut. When I was done I looked at the floor, seeing that the middle of the Hab was covered in dirt.

I looked at the bunks and frowned, “I’m sorry for the invasion of privacy but I don’t really care and I’m sure that you guys would be alright with this if you knew my situation.” I said as I started grabbing the containers that had names on them and grabbed a data stick from mine and shoved it into the television.

(Favorit Show) started to play and I smiled softly at least it can entertain me until I get out. I recorded a ton of the shows that I watched back on Earth to make sure I didn't die of boredom. Now, I'm happy to have this.

I went through my crewmates’ containers, folding the clothing as I watched the show.

* * *

**Sol 36:**

I trudged out to the Mars Descent Vehicle (MDV)—the lander that brought the six of them to Mars. I delicately begin to remove the Hydrazine tank from the undercarriage…

I came back inside and waited for my food to finish heating up.

“So here’s the rub…” I began looking down at my hands, “The problem is water. I’ve created one-hundred and twenty-six square meters of soil. But each cubic meter needs forty liters of water to be farmable. So, I have to make a lot of water.” I pause when the microwave beeps and I take out the tray and grab my fork. I turn to look at the camera leaning against the counter. “Fortunately, I know the recipe. Take hydrogen, add oxygen, and then burn.” I grimace slightly.

“Unfortunately, burn…nothing good comes from doing that. I have hundreds of liters of unused Hydrazine from the MDV. If I run the Hydrazine over an iridium catalyst, it’ll separate into N2 and H2…”

After eating, I started duct taping trash bags to create a tent, and cover my work table. I grab my broken space suit that’s still covered in blood and tear the air hose from it and taping it to the tent, and grab the step ladder to hang it from the roof. That’s the chimney.

I vent pure oxygen from a tank, light it with a spark from battery wires. I heard the wood shavings burn and slowly hold the torch and start the Hydrazine flow. The Hydrazine sizzles on the iridium and disappears. I gaze up to the chimney. The flame bursts start sputtering out from the hose. I grin, it’s working.

I check the instruments, mindful of the temperature carefully, and repeat.

* * *

I’m sitting crisscross on my bed, facing the camera: “Now, I just need to direct the hydrogen into a small area and burn it. Luckily, in the history of humanity, nothing bad has ever happened from lighting hydrogen on fire.” I stare at the camera with a nervous smile. “Believe it or not, the challenge has been finding something that will hold a flame. NASA hates fire because the whole “fire makes everyone die in space” thing. So everything we brought with us is flame retardant. With the notable exception of Martinez’s personal items.”

I take out a small wooden cross with Jesus on it. “Sorry Martinez. If you didn’t want me going through your stuff, you shouldn’t have left me for dead on a desolate planet.” I shrugged with a small smile as I started shaving the cross with a knife.

“But I figure you won’t mind, considering the situation.” I said and continued making the shavings.

* * *

Some hours later, I turned the camera on and looked tiredly at it, I hadn’t slept yet, I wanted to finish doing this before sleeping. I look down at my notebook going over the calculations unknowingly missing a key component. I look at the atmospheric analyzer but I don’t give it a second thought and lit the shavings on fire and placing it at the top of the chimney.

I look up and smile before a thought crosses my mind, “Wait, why do I feel like I forgot something.” I couldn’t finish my thought as a large explosion happened. I was blasted across the room and hit the ground like a wet rag. The surrounding area was contained so the fire only lit some of the dirt and some of my clothing was on fire as I laid on the ground.

I groaned, twitching as I got up slowly.

I walked to the camera and sat down on my seat, steaming. My hair was singed in patches and I was in a complete daze.

“So, yes. I managed to blow myself up.” I said quietly, patting the clothing she wore that was destroyed and burned. “I forgot to account for the excess oxygen I was exhaling when I did my calculations.” I paused looking at the camera, “Because I’m stupid.”

I sat back, closing my eyes. Still out of it. “Why did I have to record that…I’m so dumb. If my crew ever watch this Lewis will be about to murder me, Beck’s would have a heart attack and refuse to speak with me, I can already see Johnson and Martinez laughing at me. And Vogel’s gonna be so disappointed in me.” I shook my head, hearing my neck making a loud pop. I rubbed my eyes feeling exhausted and grabbing my singed hair and pulling away from the parts that were burned.

“Interesting side note: this is how Jet Propulsion Laboratory was founded. Five guys at Cal Tech were trying to make rocket fuel and nearly burned down their dorm. Rather than expelling them, Professor…Von Karman? I want to say…banished them to a nearby farm in Pasadena and told them to keep working. And now we have a space program.”

I sat there blinking slowly and yawned, “I’m going to get back to work. Just as soon as my ears stop ringing.” I said, covering my eyes with my arm.

After a little pause, I check my math, wearing a flame-retardant suit over some of Johnson’s hoodie that I stole after my clothing was burned. I look at the camera with a nervous smile and cross my fingers as I fire up the torch.

I covered the area that I needed with a make-shift tarp so that there wasn’t any more oxygen than needed. I grin when I don’t blow up this time. “It works!”

Later that day, I step back from the table, wiping the sweat from my brow and looking at the sweat on my hands. I walk over to the walls and I notice that there’s condensation on it. I slowly trace them with my finger. I rush over to the water reclaimer and takes the lid off the tank.

It’s filled with water.


	5. She's Alive?!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Finally figured out how to make the chapters how I want! So hopefully, this style makes more sense.
> 
> In this chapter, NASA finally figures out that the Astronaut (Name) is actually alive. How are they going to react? 
> 
> Better question, how are they getting her back home?

**Sol 48:**

Slowly the dirt was beginning to become wet as the experiment worked. All-day I was venting the Hydrazine, checking my readouts, collecting water from the reclaimer, spreading the water over the soil. Taking a break for lunch and immediately going back to work.

The camera’s speed lapse as I fall asleep before waking up and putting up my spacesuit and exiting the Hab, bringing more dirt. The process repeats.

Until one day, (Name) is cooking her lunch and crossing another day in her makeshift day count with a red marker. She stops and looks over to the ground and there’s a single patch of soil. She heads over to it slowly and leans down.

“Hey there buddy.” (Name) start softly and gently touches the green sprout. “Thank you for growing…” (Name) started crying in pure happiness.

* * *

**Sol 54 :**

Teddy, today was speaking before a memorial. A somber crowd listens in silence. A couple and their child along with their spouse are crying in the front. Everyone grieves for the loss of another life.

“Our nation was blessed to have (Name) serving in our space program. Her loss will be deeply felt. She was a friend and great company to all and those who knew her. She worked tirelessly to help everyone that she knew.” Teddy paused, looking at the faces of those who were close to (Name) crying and holding hands in grief. “But, the men and women of NASA will soldier forth, onward and upward, unbroken in the mission of their agency. In doing so, they honor the legacy (Name) left behind, and they ensure her sacrifice will not be in vain.”

They brought the empty casket onto the ground a everyone placed their flowers once it was buried.

They lost someone important today.

* * *

**Johnson Space Center, Houston, TX.**

Vincent Kapoor, Director of Mars Missions walks into the main lobby. The guards glance up from the television and nod hello. Vincent walks through security, he saw what they were watching. “President Speaks at (Last Name)'s Memorial”. Vincent felt as small ache seeing the reminder that one of his closest friends was killed. Especially when knowing that it was (Name). At first, when he first met her they weren’t close but after choosing her for the Ares 3 mission, they grew close. She was like a daughter to him.

Looking away from the CNN News report he walked to Teddy’s office. “I thought you gave a lovely speech, by the way.”

Not one to talk, Teddy gestures for Vincent to hand him the request form he’s holding. “I need you to authorize my satellite time.”

Teddy gives it a quick glance, shaking his head, “It’s not going to happen.”

Vincent felt some anger wash over him, “We’re funded for five Ares missions. I think I can get Congress to authorize a sixth.”

“No.”

“They evac’d after eighteen sols. There’s half a mission worth of supplies up there. I can sell another mission at a fraction of the cost. I just need to know what’s left of our assets.”

“You’re not the only one who needs satellite time. Plus, I know there’s something else you want. We’ve got the Ares 4 supply missions coming up. We should be focusing on the Schiaparelli Crater.”

“I’m talking about securing us another mission. We have twelve satellites in orbit, we can surely spare a few hours—” Vincent was cut off.

“It’s not about the satellite time, Vince.”

“Then what is?”

“We’re a public domain organization. We have to be transparent about this.”

“The second we point the satellites at the Hab…you broadcast pictures of (Name) (Last Name) dead body to the world.” Vince sighed.

“I’m afraid of the PR problem. Another mission? Congress won’t reimburse us for a paper clip if we put a dead astronaut on the cover of The Washington Post.”

“What do we do? She’s not going to decompose. She’ll be up there forever.” He said making small gestures with his hands as he frowns.

“Meteorology estimates she’ll be covered in sand from normal weather activity within a year.

“We don’t have a year!” Vince yells. “Are we seriously going to leave her body there? After all that she’s done for us, for NASA?!”

“We can’t do anything, and you know that.” Teddy sighed, sitting at his desk.

“What if…the world is on our side. Sympathy for the (Name)'s family is high…and Ares 6 could bring the body home. If we wait a year no one is going to care, and she…”

“Doesn’t deserve that…” Teddy said, looking out the window.

* * *

**NASA - Mission Control – Night**

A woman in her twenties checks the work order on her screen. She was Mindy Park, Satellite communications. She straightens up when she sees the request comes from “Kapoor, Vincent.” She enters the latitude and longitude…

“Acidalia Planitia…”

She clicks on the images pop up: That’s where (Name) was supposed to be. While not knowing the woman personally, she’s heard all the things that (Name) has done since joining the space program. She was a legend, she always cared for people and did her work efficiently. It was a great loss now that she’s dead.

She looks at the Hab site and morbid curiosity takes over wanting to see (Name)'s dead body. But she can’t find it. She zooms in on the Hab and she notices something is strange.

She sees the rover from Sol 18 on a different day on Sol 54. And the solar planes were different.

“Oh, God…” Her heart racing at the realizations.

She’s alive. (Name)'s alive. Oh god.

She fumbles with her phone as she dials a quick number. “Security? This is Mindy Park in SatCon. I need the emergency contact number for Dr. Kapoor. Yes, him. _Yes, it’s an emergency –”_ She looks back at the images.

“(Name)'s alive…”

* * *

Mindy sat in her seat, surrounded by Teddy Sanders, Vincent Kapoor, and Annie Montrose, Director of Media Relations. All of them were staring at the Hab site on the screen.

“How sure?” Teddy asked.

“Nearly 100%.” Vincent says, he stated in complete horror.

“Do you understand the shitstorm that’s about to hit us?” Annie said in fearful anger.

“Annie, one thing at a time.” Teddy says before looking at Vince, “Prove it to me.”

Vincent points to the image of sol 18, “Look at Rover 2, According to the logs, Commander Lewis took it out on Sol 17, plugged it into the Hab to recharge. It’s been moved.” He shows the image of Sol 54 to see the difference on where it was.

“Here’s the thing, check the MDV, it’s been taken apart. There’s no way they’d do that without telling us and the solar planes have been cleaned and moved. (Name)'s alive.”

“Why don’t we talk to Lewis? Let’s go to CAPCOM and ask her directly right now.” Annie said and Teddy immediately shook his head. “No, if (Last Name)'s really alive…we don’t want the Ares 3 crew to know.”

“What?” Vincent said, snapping to look at Teddy.

“They have another ten months on their trip home. Space travel is dangerous, we need them alert and undistracted.” Teddy said resolutely.

“They already think she’s dead.” Annie said.

“And they’d be devastated to find out they abandoned her.” Teddy said, “Remember what happened to Johnson after they left Mars. He had a complete meltdown. We have to protect the crew. There’s nothing they can do anyway. Let them deal with the emotional trauma when they’re not trapped in a spaceship. How do we handle the public?”

Annie shook her head, “Legally, we have 24-hours before we’re required to release anything to the public.”

“We’ll need to release a statement with them. We don’t want people working it out on their own.” Teddy said and Annie snapped.

“Do you realize the shitstorm that’s going to hit us? ‘Dear America, remember that astronaut we thought we killed and had a nice funeral for? Turns out she’s alive and we left her on Mars, our bad. Sincerely, NASA.’ I mean, everyone knew (Name), she was basically famous. People were devastated hearing her being dead, they’ll ruin us for leaving her on mars.”

“I need to get on a plane to (Home state/City/Town).” Teddy said, standing up.

“(Name)'s family…” Vince said and Teddy nodded. “They should hear it from me before it breaks on the news.”

“They’ll be happy to hear their daughter’s alive.” Annie said.

“Them and half the world, but if my math is right, she’s going to starve to death long before we can help her. And I’m not exactly looking forward to that conversation.” He then leaves in a hurry.

Vince’s eyes drift to the images on the screen, “Can you imagine what she’s going through? She’s fifty million miles from home, thinks she’s totally alone, and that we all gave up on her. What kind of effect does that have on a person’s psychology? What is she thinking about right now?”

* * *

**The Hab – On Mars**

I finally got out of the shower, and I was drying off my hair. I look at the camera in pain, “I’m definitely going to die up here…” I rest my head down. ‘Turn the Beat Around’ by Vicki Sue Robinson is playing on the computer. Before looking directly into the camera. “…If I have to listen to any more goddamn disco music.”

“Jesus, Commander Lewis, you couldn’t have picked anything from this Century?” I asked exasperated rubbing my hands down my face. “WHY DID I GIVE JOHNSON MY MUSIC DRIVE?!” I yelled, slamming the spacebar on the computer stopping the music.

“I’m not turning the beat around. I refuse to.” I whined, grabbing one of Beck’s books, at least he had some class and I turned to where I left my bookmark and read for a bit before getting back to work.


	6. Finding Pathfinder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I know that Mitch Henderson was kind of not connect with Mark in both the movie or the book but I love his character so much that I just had to have him as your mentor. They'll be some more information about the reader in the next chapter. 
> 
> (Name) must try to find a way to contact Earth, and so she scours through the Mars surface for an earlier Martian Landing NASA had conducted that has long since been forgotten.

**Sol 70**

“It’s time to start thinking long term. The next NASA mission is Ares 4. It’s supposed to land at the Schiaparelli Crater, 3,200 km away.” I said and began tracing a route from my position to the crater on the screen. “NASA’s presupplies each mission years in advance, so the MAV is already there, synthesizing fuel. In four years when the Hermes returns, I’ll have to launch from there. Which means I gotta get to the crater.”

After finishing the route I exit the Hab and rip the large battery out of Rover 1 and drag it over to Rover 2. (Where am I going to put this?)

After spending the whole day outside, I sat in front of the camera, “So, I’ve got two rovers designed to go a max distance of 35 Kilometers before they need to be recharged at the Hab. That’s problem A. Problem B is it’ll take me…roughly fifty days to make the journey. So I have to be able to live for fifty days. Inside a rover with marginal life support, the size of a small van. And yeah, problem C is if I don’t figure out how to make contact with NASA in the first place, none of this matter anyway. So…yes, in the face of overwhelming odds, I’m left with one option.”

I pause slightly for dramatical effect, “I’m going to have science the shit out of this.”

After making the log I exited out of the Hab, attaching the batter to Rover 2 with a makeshift harness. After doing so I go out for a test run and while it wasn’t pretty, the spare batter holds, and so do the solar panels.

But it’s already night time and I turn on the camera trembling from the cold and I could hear my teeth chattering. “Okay, so…success? I’ve doubled my batter life by scavenging Rover 1. But, if I use my heater, it’ll eat up half my batter power everyday. If I don’t use my heater, I will slowly be killed by the laws of thermodynamics.” I gave a small laugh seeing my breath in air. “I would love to solve this problem but, I think my brain is frozen…” I paused and looked at my fingers, they were turning blue.

“No, I can’t. I’m calling it.” I said, turning on the heater and heading back to the Hab.

* * *

**Sol 71:**

I’m driving the Rover across the Acidalia Planitia and I could see the Green Flag planted at the top of a hill. “Okay, well good news: I may have a solution to my heating problem. Bad news: it involves me digging up the Radioisotope Thermoelectric Generator. Now, if I remember my training correctly, one of the lessons was titled, “Don’t Dig Up The Big Box of Plutonium, (Name)…’ I understand that RTGs are good for spacecraft, but if they rupture around humans…no more humans. Which is why we buried it when we arrived and then planted that flag so we would never be stupid enough to accidentally go near it again…But, as long as I don’t break it…” I paused, “I almost said something stupid out loud…”

And so I took out the RTG from the ground and it looked like a small missile and wrapped it carefully with the flame retardant sheet and strapped it into the back of the Rover.

And so now I was driving with it and I was sweating, so I turned on the camera. “I know this is dangerous but I’m not cold anymore. And I could choose to think about the fact that I’m warm because I have a decaying radioactive isotope riding with me, but there’s good news.” I grinned looking at the camera like a child in a candy shop. I grabbed a data stick from the seat next to me. “I would like to present to you Doctor Christopher Beck’s Data stick. I found this when I was looking through his stuff, at first I was looking for his books because I know that he brought some books on board when I found this and I looked through it.” I looked at the camera for a second.

“You’ll be surprised to hear what kind of music he likes.” and I hit the play on the computer. (favorite band) started playing. “Beck, why didn’t you ever tell me you like (favorite music genre)?!” I grinned and laughed as I drove on.

* * *

**NASA – Press Room:**

A CNN Reporter conducts an interview with Vincent in the NASA MEDIA ROOM. Annie watches like a nervous stage mom. “Where is (Last Name) going?”

“We believe she’s preparing for a journey. She’s conducting incremental tests—taking the Rover 2 out for longer and longer trips each time.” Vince said.

“To what end? Why should she leave the relative safety of the Hab?”

“Communication. We believe she plans to travel to the Ares 4 launch site in order to make contact with us. But it would be a dangerous gamble.”

“She’d be risking her life to talk to you?”

Vincent nods, “This is the problem (Name) faces. She’s alone, and she needs to make contact to survive. But if we could talk to her, we’d tell her to stay put. (Name) needs to trust we’re doing everything in our power to bring her home…alive.”

After the interview Vincent was walking with Annie down the halls, “Don’t say ‘Bring her back home alive.’ It reminds the world that she might die.”

“You think people might forget that?” He asked.

“You asked how you did and I’m giving you my answer. My answer is ‘Eh.’. And yes, I’m going to make everyone forget there’s a strong likelihood that (Name) (Last Name) is going to die because that’s what you pay me for and unfortunately I need this job because I’m currently paying alimony to two deadbeat ex-husbands because somehow gender equality has bitten me square in the ass.”

“Hard to believe that-“ Vince was cut off.

“I left them.”

And then they enter the conference room as the rest of the Department Heads are setting for the meeting. Teddy looks up, “Don’t say ‘Bring her home alive,’ Vincent.”

“You know, these interviews aren’t easy. God forbid I try to say something proactive and positive.”

“Annie.” Teddy said.

“No more Vincent on television. Copy that.” She quips ignoring the look Vincent shot her.

“Seventy-Six kilometers. Am I reading that right?” Teddy asked but no one knows who he’s talking to.

“Are you asking me?” Mindy asks.

“I am.”

“Yes, sir. (Name) drove straight away from the Hab for almost two hours, did a short EVA, then drove another two. We think the EVA was to change the batteries.”

Mitch Henderson, Hermes Flight Director and (Name)'s mentor sat at the table. “Excuse me, are you the one who found (Name) was alive?” He asks looking at Mindy who nods hesitantly.

“Thank you.” Mitch said and Mindy grew confused until Vincent said, “This is Mitch Henderson, Hermes Flight Director and (Name)'s mentor.”

Mindy looked surprised and nodded. She can’t imagine what he’s been going through.

“She’s seventy-six kilometers away from the Hab. If it’s a test and doesn’t work…she’s dead.”

“She didn’t load up the Oxygenator or the Water Reclaimer?” Teddy asked.

“I didn’t see that happen, no sir.” Mindy said.

“Didn’t see it?” He asked again.

“Every forty-one hours, we have a seventeen-minute gap. It’s just the way the orbit works. So…it’s possible we missed something.” Mindy explained.

“I want that gap down to four minutes. I’m giving you total authority over satellite trajectories and orbital adjustments. Make it happen.” Teddy ordered.

(Um…) “Okay.”

“Now, let’s assume Ms. Park didn’t miss something, so (Name)'s not going to Ares 4, yet.

But she’s smart enough to figure out that’s her only chance. Bruce, what’s the earliest we could get a presupply there?” He looks to the brilliant-but-constantly-harried man skyping in on the computer screen Bruce NG, Director, Jet Propulsion Laboratory.

“With the positions of Earth and Mars, it’ll take nine months. And it’ll take us six months to build it in the first place.” Bruce said.

“Three months.” Teddy said, “You’re going to say that’s impossible, then I’m going to give you a speech about the blinding capabilities of the JPL team. And then you’ll do the math in your head and say something like ‘The overtime alone will be a nightmare.’”

(Oh god I didn’t even think of that.) “The overtime will be a nightmare.” Bruce said mumbled.

“Get started, I’ll find you the money.” Teddy ordered.

“We’ve got to tell the crew.” Mitch said.

“We’ve discussed this.” Teddy said.

“You’ve discussed this. But I’m the one who decides what’s best for the crew. They deserve to know.” Mitch stated.

“Sorry, Mitch. They need to concentrate on getting home.”

“Bullshit.” Vincent said.

“Once we have a real rescue plan, we’ll tell them Otherwise it’s moot. Bruce has three months to get the payload done. That’s all that matters right now.” Teddy said.

“We’ll do our best.” Bruce said.

“(Name) dies if you don’t.”

* * *

**Sol 79:**

“So it’s been 48 sols since I planted the potatoes, so now it’s time to reap and re-sow. They grew even better than I expected. I now have 400 healthy potato plants. The smaller one I’ll re-seed, and the larger one are my food supply. All-natural, organic, Martian-grown potatoes You don’t hear that every day, do you?” I grinned happily. “But, none of this matters, at all, if I don’t figure out how to make contact with NASA.” I frowned.

After re-seeding the potatoes I looked over to the map. My eyes ran through the entire thing before the realization hit me. I touch the touchscreen and go to the Chryse Planitia.

“I know what I have to do.” I whisper to myself as I gather my supplies and head to the Rover.

* * *

**NASA – Mission Control:**

“She’s on the move again.” Mindy says looking up and Vincent huddles over.

“Where the hell is she going? She hasn’t changed course in thirteen days. And she’s nowhere near the course for Ares 4…” Vincent sighs, wanting to know where (Name) was heading.

“Unless she’s not taking a direct route. Maybe she’s trying to avoid some obstacle…” Mindy suggests.

“What obstacle? It’s Acidalia Planitia. There’s nothing out there but—” Vincent stops short as he gazes at the screen again. Mindy turns to look at him.

“I need a map.” Vincent bolts away and Mindy quickly follows. He hurries into the employee break room. A lone technician sits, sipping coffee. On the back wall there was a large picture of mars.

Vincent rips the picture off the wall.

“Hey, c’mon.” The technician retorts and Vincent doesn’t turn to him. “I’ll put it back.” He then turns to Mindy, “What’s the Hab’s location?” He asked.

“31.2 degrees north, 28.5 degrees west.” Vincent grabs a dry-erase marker as well as the ruler of the technician table. He draws a straight line to show the route (Name) was taking.

“I know where she’s going. Damn is she a smart one.” Vincent grins and bolts to his office.

“Where is she going?” Mindy yelled but Vincent didn’t hear her.

“I need to get on an airplane!”

* * *

**Mars:**

I drive up the hill and get out the rover, it has to be around here. I had the camera from my spacesuit turned on, “Come on, where is it?” I said desperately as I grab my shovel and look around.

I was walking when I felt something trip me, I let out a gasp when I fell forward and I looked to see that I tripped on a wire, “Yes!” I squeaked and grabbed it and followed it. When it came to a stop and I pulled it, Pathfinder was down here.

I grabbed my shovel and carefully dug out Pathfinder.

* * *

**Jet Propulsion Laboratory, Pasadena, California:**

Bruce waited in the lobby as Vincent walks through the front doors with a small carry-on bag. He rushes up to him and they shake hands. “Sir.”

They hurry across the JPL campus, “What are the odds (Name) can get it working again?” Vincent asks.

“Hard to say, we lost contact in ’97. We think it was a battery failure. Though, I’d like to point out it lasted three times longer than expected in any scenario.” Bruce said.

“Nobody’s criticizing JPL’s work, Bruce. I want to talk to everyone who was here in ’97.”

“They’re already waiting for you.”

They head into the JPL garage and see a group of people already there. “This is the replica?” Vincent asks gesturing to the sheet-covered Pathfinder. It was the American spacecraft launched in 1996. It’s in two notable sections—the larger Lander and the smaller Sojourner Rover.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Lots of curse words. Lots and lots of f-bombs.
> 
> Having finally made contact with NASA, (Name) is now devastated that none of her crew members even know that she's alive. How does she react? 
> 
> Spoiler Alert: Not Nicely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hello darlings~ Before starting the chapter, I just want to give some quick info on the reader. So basically, you started working for NASA as an intern when you were 16 before working your way up during your college years. And now, you should be in your late 20s to early 30s. (Changing Beck's age to the same one as you b/c how can he be 36?!) Anyways you've been working for NASA for a decade, so the rage is real.
> 
> I always wondered what Mark said to them during the movie because it was so anti-climactic in the book so this is my imagination playing out. Hope you enjoy darlings!

**Sol 109:**

I uncovered Pathfinder and all I could do was stare at it in amazement. It was amazing. But I had work to do so I grabbed the Lander to the back of Rover 2 and latching it into the makeshift harness I had.

When I made it back to the Hab I placed the Sojourner beside the workbench outside the Hab, as I carefully and methodically took apart the Lander. I’ve been probably doing this for hours, my neck and back protesting me sitting in such a position for so long and I wasn’t even sure if I turned off the camera before I started this.

And then, I remove the battery as gently as I could and replace it with an environment heater that was beside me. I literally felt like a surgeon who was performing a heart transplant. I lock the heater in place, and it clicks.

* * *

**JPL Garage:**

**PATHFINDER LOG: SOL 0 BOOT SEQUENCE INITIATED TIME 00:00:00 LOADING OS…PERFORMING HARDWARE CHECK…INT TEMPERATURE: -34C, EXT TEMPERATURE: NONFUCTIONAL, BATTERY: FULL, HIGAIN: OKAY, LOGAIN: OKAY, METEOROLOGY: NONFUNCTIONAL, SOLAR A: NONFUNCTIONAL, SOLAR B: NONFUNCTIONAL, SOLAR C: NONFUNCTIONAL, HARDWARE CHECK COMPLETE**

**BROADCASTING STATUS**

**LISTENING FOR TELEMETRY SIGNAL…**

**LISTENING FOR TELEMETRY SIGNAL…**

**LISTENING FOR TELEMETRY SIGNAL…**

**SIGNAL ACQUIRED.**

Bruce, Vincent and the rest of the JPL team see the words come up on the main screen as the large antenna on the Lander began to move and pointed upwards. The group came out cheers as the laughed and grinned.

* * *

**Mars:**

I gasped and held my breath as the antenna came up and started to move…angling towards Earth.

I started laughing and jumping up and down in joy. I sniffled slightly and started making incoherent noises, but I didn’t care. I did a small little happy dance because I was so happy.

This was step one.

I quickly ran inside grabbing some boards and started writing my message. I grabbed to smaller boards and after looking at them I nodded and went outside.

* * *

**JPL Garage:**

Vincent and Bruce cluster around the station of Time Grimes. “As soon as I received the high-gain response, I directed Pathfinder to take a panoramic image.” Tim said.

“Have you received it yet?” Vincent asks in a hurry.

“Yes, but I thought we would all rather look at this black screen instead of a vibrant red planet.” Tim responded.

“What? Are you kidding me?” Vincent looked like he was going to blow.

“Hey! HEY! Tim!” Bruce snapped and mouths ‘I will fire you’ to his co-worker.

“Incoming.” Tim said feeling slightly scared now.

The panoramic starts to appear and the group could see a board with a handwritten note. Vincent started to tear up a little when he saw the familiar handwriting that (Name) had. It had been so long since he’s seen it.

_Are you receiving me?_

_Yes No_

“Point the camera to yes!” He exclaimed happily but it fell off his face when Tim started talking.

“Thirty-two minute round trip communications time and she can only ask yes/no questions and all we can do is point the camera. This won’t exactly be an Algonquin round table of snappy repartee.”

“Seriously?”

“Tim!”

“Roger that, pointing the camera.”

* * *

**Mars:**

I was slightly dozing off when I heard the whirling of Pathfinder. I jolted from my seat and ran up to Pathfinder and stood behind the middle board and walked in the direction that the camera was pointing. I looked down at the board and felt joy wash over me. I raised my hands over my head.

“Yes! Yes! Whoo!” I celebrated. Let me have my moments.

I headed to the Hab and was cooking one of my potatoes in the microwave and sat down at the table with the camera on. “Okay, so here’s the rub…Somehow, we need to have complex astrophysical engineering conversations using only a still-frame camera…From 1996.” I sighed, biting into my potato and immediately regretted it. “Oh god, hot! Hot!” I exclaimed covering my mouth with my hand to have it open so the air can cool it down.

It took a few seconds, but I managed to chew it and look at the camera somewhat embarrassed. “Anyways, as luck would have it, the camera does spin, so I can make an alphabet. Not our alphabet though, twenty-six characters plus a question card into 360 gives us a 13-degree arc. It’s too narrow. I wouldn’t be able to know what the camera was pointing at.” I paused to think as I ate my now cooled down potato.

I ate quietly thinking until an idea popped into my head. “Hexadecimals…Hexadecimals to the rescue.” I grinned. I closed my log and ran to Johnson’s bunk; I had the television on with the climax of (Fav. TV Show) on. I grabbed Johnson’s container and looked through it.

“Ladies and gents, I would like to present to you supernerd, Mark Johnson. I.e.: My Bestest friend on Mars. I knew someone had to keep an ASCII table somewhere and I logged onto his laptop and started scrolling through it.”

“He has copies of Zork 2 and Leather Goddesses of Phobos on his laptop.” I laughed. “Johnson, you’re the biggest dork I’ve ever met.” I laughed, “Seriously Johnson…It’s like the Smithsonian of loneliness here…And I thought _I_ had problems.” And in my head, I could hear him yelling at me if he ever heard me say that.

I take his laptop and go to my station and transfer the ASCII table that I found onto the screen. “Yes!” I clapped my hands and started making cards using the table.

I went outside and started making an arc and every step I took I placed down a card until all the cards were placed and I used a hammer to lock them in place. And it seemed that NASA understood because after waiting for an hour or so the camera moved and on my cards I wrote down the letters that they were pointing to.

“Thank god that I had you here Johnson. Even if you think that I’m dead.” I said to myself as I came back inside. There was a storm outside, and I was having trouble staying still. There had been storms since my stay here and every time that it happened, I kept being reminded of what happened to me on Sol 18.

I was curled up on my bed surrounded by my crewmates’ blanket and pillows. I took a little nap but with the wind hitting the Hab I wasn’t getting much sleep. I was wearing one of Beck’s fluffy jackets but because I wasn’t getting much rest, I looked at the text that I had yet to translate.

I went to my station flinching every time I heard the wind and the noise and read the deciphered text. _‘How alive?’_

I snorted softly at the understatement of that question before starting to write my response.

**JPL Garage:**

_‘Well, I’ve been impaled with the communications antenna which lead to my bio-monitor to be destroyed. The crew probably thought I had died on Sol 18, but it is not their fault. It was some bad luck.’_

* * *

**The Rover – Mars**

“Now that we can have more complicated conversations, the smart people at NASA have sent me instructions on how to hack the rover so that it can talk to Pathfinder. If I hack a tiny bit of code, just twenty instructions in the Rover’s operating system, NASA can link the rover to Pathfinder’s broadcasting frequency…and we’re in business.” I said looking at the camera with a smile as I started hacking the rover. I waited until the text pops up on the screen.

_‘(Name), this is Vincent Kapoor…We’ve been watching you since Sol 54. I’m so happy that you’re alive and found Pathfinder. The whole world is rooting for you. Amazing work, we’re working on rescue plans. Meantime, we’re putting together a supply mission to keep you fed until Ares 4 arrives.’_

I read the message and re-read the message it’s been so long since someone has talked to me. I started crying, “Thank you…Thank you so much, Vince…You’ve been watching me…Oh god…Thank you….” I cried before looking at my trembling hands trying to type a message.

_‘Thank god, Vincent it’s so good to hear from you. I’m really glad to hear it. I’m really looking to not dying.’_ I started laughing and my eyes widened, “The crew, how’s the crew?” I said to myself and frantically typing my answer.

* * *

**JPL Garage**

Everyone was laughing at the message (Name) had sent over until Vincent notices that there’s more…

_‘How’s the crew? What did they say when they found out that I was alive? Are they okay?’_

Vincent and Bruce share a glance, “What are we going to say? Teddy didn’t allow us to tell them.”

“We have to tell her. Tell her…” Bruce said.

* * *

**Rover – Mars**

I watched nervously until a message pop up and read it aloud:

_‘We haven’t told the crew you’re alive yet. We need them to concentrate on the mission.’_

“What…?” My voice cracked and felt the air in my lungs disappear as if I was just punched. “What?” I repeated clearer. “They...don't know…? What do you mean, you’ve been watching me since SOL 54 why would they not know? What the fuck do you mean by that?!” I felt so much anger.

“You know what? How about this?” I seethed typing a response.

* * *

**JPL – Garage**

The whole room waited patiently for (Name)'s response.

_‘What the fuck do you mean that they don’t know? What the fuck is wrong with you? Were you ever going to tell them that I fucking LIVED?! I was left stranded on FUCKING MARS, a planet that doesn’t grow a thing. I had to FUCKING learn how to grow plants hoping to God that I could live to see tomorrow. The only thing that kept me going is that I had my friends and family and my crew waiting for me. WHAT THE FUCK NASA?! AFTER EVERYTHING I DID FOR YOU!!’_

“Holy shit…” Tim said as looked at the message, he starts reading the message aloud immediately turning heads of everyone in the room.

_‘(Name), please watch your language…Everything you type is being broadcast live all over the world.’_

* * *

**Mars – Rover**

I grit my teeth reading the message absolutely livid, “Fuck you.”

* * *

**JPL – Garage**

Everyone waited anxiously for (Name)'s response and paled looking at the angry message that was being broadcasted to the entire world.

_‘After surviving on a desolate planet for 111 SOLS by my fucking self, you are going to listen to me. I don’t want to hear any excuses, especially from the organization that I have spent over a decade working for. You have been watching since Sol fucking 54 and you never thought about telling my crew? That’s a fucking punch in the dick right there. You fucking assholes, no, you guys are some of the biggest Bureaucratic felchers I have ever had the displeasure to meet. How in the world was this going to more affecting to my crew? THEY THOUGHT I WAS DEAD IN THE FIRST PLACE, THEY LEFT ME HERE AND I DON’T BLAME THEM BY ANY STRETCH OF THE IMAGINATION, BUT HOW COULD THEM HEARING I WAS ALIVE BE MORE AFFECTING THAN SEEING ME DIE?! YOU TRY LIVING IN A FUCKING RED PLANET WHERE THERE’S NO WATER, NOR FOOD OR ANYONE, BUT YOU CAN’T. I’VE BEEN ALONE THINKING EACH DAY WAS MY FUCKING LAST BECAUSE EVERYTHING THAT COULD HAVE GONE WRONG. SCREW YOU, TAKE THIS AS MY LEAVE BECAUSE I REFUSE TO WORK FOR SOMEONE LIKE YOU!!!’_

Vincent tries to hang his head in shame, he never thought (Name) would react like this. He understood why but of my god…

“HOLY SHIT!” Tim exclaimed; he couldn’t even hide the smile that was on his face. He just wished he had some popcorn to watch this with.

* * *

**NASA – Mission Control**

Mitch started laughing seeing (Name)'s response, that’s what NASA deserved for letting something like this happen. He was so proud of her, he couldn’t wait until she came back and gave NASA a real piece of her mind. Everyone knows not to mess with (Name), and Teddy just earned at huge vendetta.

Speaking about Teddy he looked over to see Teddy talking on his phone, “Yes sir…she’s under a tremendous amount of stress…I understand. We’re working on it. Thank you, sir.”

Teddy cut the call and looked over to Mitch, “I just had to explain to the President of the United States what a “bureaucratic felcher” is.”

“I told you we need to tell them, now one of our most valuable workers is not only stuck on mars but angrier than the devil at you. Which brings us to point that we need to tell the crew, it’ll only be worse the longer we wait. It’s time, Teddy.”


	8. The Crew Finds Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The crew finds out!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So, this is a 10-page chapter, sorry about that. But really it's not that long. The crew finds out (Name) is alive and that they have stranded her on Mars. Not only will it tell of their reactions but they will be shown two recordings, one of the time (Name) survived on Sol 19 and the other is her rage against NASA during the last chapter. It's really just them reacting to it.
> 
> WARNINGS: Mentions of Blood and profanity. Please be advised, you've been warned

**The Hermes – Present- Space**

It’s been four months since they had left Mars and everyone was still in mourning over the loss of their crew member. It was so quiet, Johnson was probably the most affected over everyone. He was the one who watched be blown away and…killed.

After they came back onto the Hermes and evac’d he had a complete meltdown after a week. It had happened when Johnson was in Medical with Doctor Beck, they had started counseling but he completely lost it. Johnson started having a panic attack and kept struggling against his crew. He tried so hard, calling out for (Name).

Commander Lewis gave the order to knock him out and they had to live with the consequences that (Name) was really gone. No one dared mention the name in fear that they would also grieve.

Everyone suffered through nightmares, no one should be left behind. It wasn’t until one night that Johnson woke up screaming out (Name)'s name. He dreamt of the day that she died, he was right back at that moment and he could see her standing, she was trying to tell them her idea when he tried to grab her, but every time…Every single time he couldn’t grab her.

So when Johnson got up and walked to the kitchen at 3 in the morning and wasn’t the least surprised to see Beck's shoulders slumped sitting alone by himself. He seemed that he had a crying secession if the redness of his eyes were anything to go by. Johnson knew that even though the doctor tried to be rational, he missed the girl just as much as the others.

They sat together, neither of them talking except when Beck sighed, “You know, me and (Name) were really close. We met before the space program she was the nicest person in the universe.”

Johnson gave a weak chuckle, “She was. I met her only after we got chosen for Ares 3, but god did I wish we met before. She became my best friend so quickly that I thought I had known her all my life.”

“She just had that effect on people.” Beck said before feeling his throat clog. “We used to date.”

“What?” Johnson said in shock.

“Before…before we were chosen. She was the one helping me with my training as an astronaut. We became close and I confessed…I didn’t think she would say yes. But we dated for a year and a half before I got scared. (Name) was going to be second hand on this mission, that was decided long before anything but I was scared that if I was chosen as well how would NASA react. So, I broke it off, a week later I get the letter saying I was chosen, and she found me. She looked at me straight in the eyes and gave me one of her smiles as if I hadn’t broken her heart and said, ‘Look, I know we broke it off and I want to tell you that I won’t get in your way, I won’t make it awkward. I won’t make you uncomfortable, and I won’t say anything to anyone. I give you my word.’” Beck starts weeping remembering that.

“But…But we—I tried so hard to forget her, I was the one who broke it off but getting to spend time with her, it made me realize my mistake. I was such an idiot back then, caring more about NASA then my own feelings- her feelings. I promised myself that when we were going to leave and return to Earth I was going to apologize and I would have done anything for her to take me back. I was going to be honest with my feelings but then…”

Johnson was agape from where he was sitting. He didn’t believe that Beck was lying, but it was a head-turner learning that Beck and (Name) had a relationship, if hadn’t just been told he would have never believed it.

“And then, as the doctor, I couldn’t let everyone know how affected I was because…because… so I tried so hard but now I have to live with myself that I didn’t tell her my feelings because I was such a coward…”

Johnson frowned, placing his arm around Beck’s shoulders. He didn’t really know what to say, but he offered any comfort that he could.

* * *

Since that night, Johnson and Beck grew close, both mourning together, one over the loss of their best friend and the other over the loss of a lost love. They talked about stories that they shared with the girl, laughing at the memories. Slowly, they were getting better but never whole. That part was dead.

Lewis stood alone in a secluded section of the ship, it was actually (Name)'s favorite place to be on the Hermes. Lewis remembered finding her here once and made a promise not to tell anyone that she was there. Now she understood why looking at the stars from this spot was perfect. None of the other views could compare. “Go ahead.” She said hearing Johnson call her name over the radio.

“Data dump is almost complete.” Johnson said.

“Copy, coming to you.” Lewis said before floating towards the Semicone-A ladder. Martinez beats her there and he floats up the ladder.

“You’re in a hurry.” She said.

“My son turned three yesterday. Should be some pics of the party.” He said and Lewis never mentioned that (Name) would have loved to seen her Godson’s party. They made their way down the ladder, the centripetal force from the rotating craft creates artificial gravity. Halfway down, they use their hands on the ladder.

The others are already there – the Rec Room, the data dump was the highlight of the day.

“All right, we’ve got a batch of personals. Dispatching them to your laptops…I don’t need to read Vogel’s weird German fetish emails…” Johnson said with a hint of a smile.

“They’re telemetry updates.” The German retorts.

“Whatever does it for you. We’ve got a system update, I’ll take care of that, and…huh. There’s a voice message and two recordings attached to it. It’s addressed to the whole crew.”

Lewis furrows her brow and gestures for everyone to come and watch it. “Play it.”

Johnson opens the message and hits play, they see Mitch, he looked a little pale and nervous. “Okay, Hermes, this is Mitch Henderson. I have some news…” He pauses, looking at something in the background before turning to look at the camera directly, “There’s no easy way to say this, but just be straight and say it: (Name) (Last Name) is alive.”

The news hit the crew like a freight train. What? Johnson felt like the world was ripped under his feet, Lewis gasped her hand covered her mouth. Martinez felt like he was just punched in the gut. Vogel became stiff and Beck forgot how to breathe.

“I know that this is a surprise, and I know that you have a lot of questions but I must tell you the basics first: she’s alive and healthy, for the most part. But we found out two months ago and we decided not to tell you. I, and others have been strongly against the decision but the reason that we’re telling you now is because we finally have communication with her and a viable rescue plan. I will not tell you the full write up over what happened, I enclosed a video that (Name) had recorded…”

He paused and grew pale, “I advise you don’t watch it right at this moment because it is graphic…but I must say that she makes sure to tell us that this was not your fault, at all. (Name) has put an emphasis on it every time we communicated with her. Please take the time to absorb this, the first video should be able to explain the events that happened on sol 19. The second is the recording of our communication with her yesterday that was broadcasted to the world. Send all your questions you want and we’ll answer them. (Name)has kept a video log since the events, and we will be able to send them to you when they are sent to us. This is my personal decision because as the ones that were the closest, you must see what she has done. Henderson out.”

For a moment the group sits in stunned silence.

“She…She’s alive…” Johnson managed to get out before starting to weep.

“Oh god…” Lewis nearly crumbled over to the floor had she not been sitting down. “I left her on Mars.”

“No…” Beck said, strained and as if grasping for air. “I declared her dead…”

“Guys! No, we are not going to do this right at this moment!” Martinez said and the crew turned to look at him and they saw that he too was crying.

“She’s alive…she’s alive and that’s all that matters.” Martinez said with a smile.

“(Last Name) lives.” Vogel said with a wide smile.

Johnson was hunched over on his chair sobbing like a baby, “God, thank you. Fuck…(Name)'s alive…she’s alive.” 

They all needed a minute to process the information. “Play the first video.” Lewis ordered.

“Wait, he said-“ Vogel started but Lewis didn’t care.

“That’s an order.” She commanded and everyone looked at her before Johnson clicked the first video. And hit play.

The timestamp was Sol 19 6:33. There was the sound of the door slamming open and the crew watched anxiously and saw the figure still in their spacesuit. She threw her helmet off, she was sweating, her face red and in pain.

“Oh god…” Someone says as they watch as she nearly falls into the main area and then they realize why she looks the way she does. There an antenna piercing her midsection. She tears off her suit as soon as possible, her skin tight blue shirt dyed purple from the blood.

They could only watch in horror as she starts to hyperventilate and grabs the metal rod and tore it out of her body. The scream that she makes is unlike any other, they pale hearing the dreadful sound of torn skin. She had tears falling down her face and started to sway. Her skin was whiter than the walls of the Hermes and she looked like she was going to pass out. Her hand immediately pressed onto the wound but it became covered with blood and ran to the side of the Hab where Medical was. The camera followed her movements and they watched as their crew member cut open her shirt.

The puncture wound was deep, and there was just so much blood coming out of it, “Fuck…” The woman swore, making a realization and scrambling for the first-aid station, she threw what looked like anesthetic, a syringe, forceps, and the medical staple gun. She sat down in the seat as her trembling hands loaded the syringe and injected it to the wound.

She squealed painfully and grabbed the forceps and looked at it before inhaling and shoving it into the wound.

The cry she let out had the crew’s hearts twisting and they watched in fear as she suddenly became limp. She was losing consciousness…and fast.

“NO!” Johnson shouted, before watching in pure agony as (Name) grabbed the forceps again and pushing deeper…and deeper trying to find the piece of metal in her. She grabs onto the mirror leaving her bloody fingerprints before yanking the forceps out and they saw the small piece of shrapnel that she managed to get out.

“Hallelujah…” (Name) gasps, her voice damaged and almost inaudible. The crew members flinch as she slams the forceps onto the metal tray next to her and grabs the wipes to clean the wound.

But the blood isn’t stopping, it’s coming out quicker and she’s about to bleed out at this point. And then she grabs the staple gun and staples the wound shut. Her eyes are shut and whimpers and collapses onto the chair boneless.

Her breathing is erratic and they watch her trying to catch her breath until she goes into shock. Her body starts trembling and she just starts crying. She tries to wipe her tears away but only more comes out.

“Fuck.” She swears the moment of realization that she has been left alone on a planet. She was the only human there.

(Name) lays there before finally getting up and wrapping bandages to her wound. She goes out of frame but the sound of water is heard. She’s cleaning herself and then there’s some rustling before there are footsteps. They stop and slowly (Name) peeks into frame, she must have not known that it was recording.

Johnson hit the pause button not bearing to watch the rest of the video.

“Oh my god…” Commander says, her hands are shaking and her eyes are glossy.

“How…How did you survive that?” Martinez wheezes, pale.

“She should be dead…no human would be able to perform what she did in a normal situation.” Vogel said.

Beck stared wide-eyed at the screen, “No, the person would go into shock and would pass out if they were to shove the forceps into the wound. She hadn’t even waited long enough for the anesthetic.” He said, his voice wavering slightly.

“Then how-?” Vogel asked looking at Beck for an explanation.

“If she did; she would have bled to death.” Beck said sharply. “She lost so much, if she had waited then she would have passed out and died.

“Press continue.” Lewis said suddenly.

“Commander!” Martinez tried but she shook her head. “I have to know what she has to say.”

Johnson bites his lower lip, he can’t, he doesn’t want to but the commander is right. They have to know what she says. He takes a deep breath and pressed play.

She adjusts the camera, “Okay, okay…” She starts softly, her throat irritated and then she coughs and they see the spatter of blood land on her hand. She sighs and sits down but the moment she does so she turns green and reaches for a bucket.

Whatever that came out was a cause of concern as (Name) has blood on her lip. “That’s…not good.” She whimpers and wiping the blood from her lip with a napkin. “What does it mean when you throw up blood? It’s at least 100 grams…” She says softly, most likely to herself and getting up. She comes back with a now clean bucket and places it next to her out of frame. She looks at the time stamp.

“This is…(Name) (Last Name). Astronaut. I am entering this log for the record, in case I…” She takes a deep breath and looks at the camera with a sad smile, “I don’t make it…I’m sure it recorded most, if not all that happened when I came in. It’s 6:53 on sol 19. And…I’m still alive.”

She pauses, “Obviously, I’m guessing I’m going to surprise my crewmates. And NASA. And…the world…So…Surprise.” She laughs weakly. “I didn’t die on Sol 18, best I can tell-“ She holds up the jagged antenna, “—This length of our primary communications antenna made a hole into my spacesuit…And ripped a hole in me as well. It was horrible thank you for asking. But the antenna and the blood as well managed to seal the breach in my suit. Which kept me alive, but the breach must have set off the alarm on my bio-monitor, Doctor Beck and the Commander made the call that I was dead.”

Beck clenched his hands tightly in regret.

(Name) paused and her hand clenching the blanket became tighter that her knuckles became white and she looks into the camera, “Look…Lewis, Beck…if you ever hear this…just listen. It wasn’t your fault, it wasn’t anyone’s fault. Just bad luck.” She took a sharp inhale as she began crying again, “You did what you had to do, and if I was in you position I would have done the same. I’m just so happy that you made it out.” She smiled, wiping away her tears.

“I’m so happy that you made it out safely. Thank God…” She wept before calming down and sipping a bit of water.

Lewis stepped forward and paused the video herself. “(Name)…” She whispered, she was crying. “She doesn’t blame us…why? We left you stranded on Mars.” She said and Vogel stepped forward grabbing her shoulder.

“Don’t blame yourself. Neither of you should, we all left her there.” Vogel said.

“Under my orders!” Lewis cried.

“Even then, if we had found here, there’s the possibility that she wouldn’t have made it.” Johnson said quietly, turning to look at Lewis.

“Beck wouldn’t have had the resources to save her until we had gotten to the Hermes. The only reason she lived was because her blood clotted the suit. We might have not saved her.” He said, and then smiling softly.

“And it sounds like our (Name)for her to say that.” He added.

Martinez gave a laugh, “Yeah, of course she would.”

Vogel nodded and so did Beck who stepped to Lewis, “She wouldn’t want us to blame ourselves. Let’s honor her wishes and apologize when we get her back.”

Lewis looked at Beck and nodded slowly, “Yeah…when we get her back.”

“All right, though. That’s where we’re at. (Name) (Last Name), stranded on Mars. I have no way to contact NASA because our communication antenna broke and stabbed me in the stomach. Which we’ve covered-“

Martinez snorted.

“And even if I could, it will take…four years before the next manned mission gets here. And I’m in a Hab designed to last thirty-one days.” She sits back, sighing in defeat, “If the oxygenator breaks, I’ll suffocate. If the water reclaimer breaks, I’ll die of thirst. If the Hab breaches, I’ll sort of…implode. And if, by some miracle, none of that happens…eventually, I’m going to run out of food. So…yeah.” She trails off, looking at the ceiling.

“Yeah.”

The video ends and the crew is left with the fear of the unknown.

“There’s another video, should we watch it?” Martinez asks, and Johnson clicked on it but didn’t press play.

“This is the more recent one, it was recorded just yesterday.” Vogel said.

“Play it.” Beck said, he needed to know what happened when they communicated with her.

Johnson gulped slightly but clicks play. Instead of there being a person like they expected they see a screen.

* * *

**Rover 2: Are you receiving me?**

“It works!” They hear a voice say. Then there was typing. So they had her hack the rover to communicate with NASA. They watched as (Name) typed, she had some sarcasm in her words but it was her. She was alive.

And then the worse happened.

**Rover 2: How’s the crew? What did they say when they found out I’m alive? Are they okay?**

And then, “We have to tell her. Tell her…” Another voice said

_Vincent: We haven’t told them, they need to concentrate on their mission._

“BULLSHIT!!” Johnson screamed, glaring at the screen.

“How could they not tell us?” Lewis asked, eyes wide.

And then the new message came in.

“Holy shit…” Someone else said and started reading off the message.

**Rover 2: ‘What the fuck do you mean that they don’t know? What the fuck is wrong with you? Were you ever going to tell them that I fucking LIVED?! I was left stranded on FUCKING MARS, a planet that doesn’t grow a thing. I had to FUCKING learn how to grow plants hoping to God that I could live to see tomorrow. The only thing that kept me going is that I had my friends and family and my crew waiting for me. WHAT THE FUCK NASA?! AFTER EVERYTHING I DID FOR YOU!!’**

Martinez started cackling, “Oh my god, (Name)!”

Johnson joined, “You tell ‘em!”

_Vincent: ‘(Name), please watch your language…Everything you type is being broadcast live all over the world.’_

That was the wrong thing to say as it only fueled (Name)'s anger:

**Rover 2: ‘After surviving on a desolate planet for 111 SOLS by my fucking self, you are going to listen to me. I don’t want to hear any excuses, especially from the organization that I have spent over a decade working for. You have been watching since Sol fucking 54 and you never thought about telling my crew? That’s a fucking punch in the dick right there. You fucking assholes, no, you guys are some of the biggest Bureaucratic felchers I have ever had the displeasure to meet. How in the world was this going to more affecting to my crew? THEY THOUGHT I WAS DEAD IN THE FIRST PLACE, THEY LEFT ME HERE AND I DON’T BLAME THEM BY ANY STRETCH OF THE IMAGINATION, BUT HOW COULD THEM HEARING I WAS ALIVE BE MORE AFFECTING THAN SEEING ME DIE?! YOU TRY LIVING IN A FUCKING RED PLANET WHERE THERE’S NO WATER, NOR FOOD OR ANYONE, BUT YOU CAN’T. I’VE BEEN ALONE THINKING EACH DAY WAS MY FUCKING LAST BECAUSE EVERYTHING THAT COULD HAVE GONE WRONG. SCREW YOU, TAKE THIS AS MY LEAVE BECAUSE I REFUSE TO WORK FOR SOMEONE LIKE YOU!!!’**

“HOLY SHIT!” The same voice from before said.

Martinez and Johnson were laughing so hard that they started crying. Vogel was looking so proud of her. Lewis’s mouth was to the floor but she too started to laugh.

“Let’s never make (Name) angry with us.” Beck said, he felt so happy to see that she, too was angry at the decision.

“’A fucking punch in the dick.’” Johnson wheezed.

“’Bureaucratic flechers’” Martinez added and everyone started to laugh even harder.

“That’s our girl.” Lewis said.


	9. The Destruction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No one said living on a desolate planet would be easy and (Name) is just about to figure that out the hard way.

**Sol 128:**

I removed water from the water reclaimer and walk down the rows of plants, watering them one by one. And after I did that I turned the camera to record from where the middle of the Hab.

I smiled, “So after I got in contact with NASA and told them off, which felt very nice because I was holding a lot in. They won’t shut up now…They’ve got a room full of people trying to micromanage my crops. Which is awesome, because…I look to the side nervously…okay, I’m going to pull a Martinez right here but…” I pan the camera wide to see all the luscious green plants, “I’m the best botanist on the planet.”

I laugh, shaking my head, “I know I’m the only person on this planet but, man, does that have a nice ring to it. But, anyways, there’s a request for me to pose for a picture on the next transmission. I’ve been sending my logs to them since we first gain contact but Mitch told me that we couldn’t use them. The logs can only be used as of right now an indicator on how I am, and to see if I’m mentally unstable.”

“I don’t know, I’m alone on a planet and can talk to no one. I scare myself when I say something and then I automatically respond as if someone else said it. It’s quite terrifying. So I got to take a photo, I’m not really sure how I’m going to pose, I hate taking photos. But I’m not sure how that will translate with the spacesuit on.” I lent down to check one of the plants.

“An added bonus is that Mitch has been transferring my files to the Hermes, so my crew has seen some of them and they’ll be seeing this one as well! It’s nice, but one of the coolest parts is that I’ve been receiving data dumps just like the Hermes, I’ve had a lot of friends and family messages. But you won’t believe who sent me one, I’ve had it from rock stars, athletes, and even The President! But I had (Fav. Actor/Actress) write me one! That’s so cool, their one of my favorite actors/actresses, I wonder what they think about when they realize I’ve been watching some of their work here.” I pause and remember my point.

“Sorry, I keep getting sidetracked. I actually had one from the University of Chicago, they say that once you grow crops somewhere, you have officially “colonized” it. So, technically, I colonized Mars. In your face, Neil Armstrong.” I laugh.

XXX

So here I was outside in front of Pathfinder with my spacesuit on. I tilt my head slightly when the camera raises up and I give a grin and give two thumbs up.

* * *

**NASA – Conference Room**

Annie tosses a photo on the conference room table, “I ask for a picture and all I get is the Fonz?” She askes irritated.

Mindy grabs the photo and laughs and gives it to Mitch who chuckles. Of course, (Name) would be in that pose.

Vincent and Bruce were on the screen with the rest of the JPL team. “Just be grateful you got something, Annie.”

“It’s not going to work, I need a photo of her face, Vincent. I just don’t understand why I can’t use a screenshot of her during one of the logs.

“Can’t use them yet.” Mitch says.

“Well, I could tell her to remove her helmet, but then she’d, you know, die.” Vincent suggested sarcastically and the JPL team laughed.

“Let’s release the photo when we detail the rescue operation. I want to announce we’re launching some supplies to her next year during the Hohmann Transfer Window.” Teddy said.

“I’m on a plane to you this afternoon. We’ll have the release ready.” Vince said.

“Good, but Annie will handle camera appearances.” Teddy says and ignores the look that Vince shoots him. “Bruce, is the team still on schedule?”

“It’ll be tight. But we’ll make it.” He said with a nod.

“Nine-month travel time, that puts the probe to mars on Sol 848. Did we get the Botany Team’s analysis?” Teddy asks.

“They estimate (Name)'s crops will last her until Sol 912. They were ecstatic to be able to talk to the only woman who ‘colonized’ Mars.” Vincent says and Mitch has a fond smile on his face.

* * *

**Hab Airlock -Mars**

I sighed softly, I had the camera on because some of the botany team members wanted to see what I did in my daily life. I snap on my spacesuit and grab my toolkit, I closed the airlock door behind me, humming a small tune and as it depressurizes I hear a rip.

My blood runs cold and I turn to see the canvas start to stretch before it completely rips. I couldn’t even blink before there was a loud explosion and I was tossed like a rag doll with the airlock shooting like a cannon. I hit the window and I see that I’m at least 40 meters in the air before it hits the hillside and I’m slammed into the wall, my faceplate cracks, and I’m tumbling down the hill like a washing machine and then it stops.

I’m heaving, I’m hyperventilating, my ears are ringing, my head is bleeding. I force my aching body to move, I think I pulled my muscles and I drag myself to the small window and my heart drops to see the Hab destroyed. 

And to make matters worse, I just realized I was losing oxygen. I gasp, not having a lot.

 _15% oxygen levels._ My suit is telling me. I frantically search for my duct tape.

 _10% oxygen levels._ My heart is racing as I tear a piece and cover the crack. I repeat the process.

 _5% oxygen levels._ The suit is blaring alarms and I can’t find the last crack.

 _1% oxygen levels_ , for a spilt second I thought that this was going to be the way I died. I have survived for over 130 Sols, just to die from breaking my helmet. I refuse to go out like this, I smacked tape on my helmet and there was a beep.

 _Oxygen levels returning to normal._ I was letting quick, uneven breaths. “No, no, nononono.” I repeat breathlessly as I stand up, feeling dizzy as the world spins. I shake my head nearly fall, I think I twisted something.

I look down and my leg was in a rather awkward angle but I didn’t have time to worry about this. I try to open the airlock door but it’s shut tight. I groan and put all my weight into pulling it back. It swings open and I stumble back before I rush over to the destroyed Hab.

I stand in the center, the sun has long gone down leveling the room dark I turn on the camera and I’m at a lost seeing all of my plants, frozen. The plants were uprooted, equipment destroyed but I stand there looking down at the crops.

All my hard work. My _lifeline._ Destroyed.

I felt so many emotions crash into me. I wanted to scream, cry, crumple down, and just accept my fate.

**No.**

I have never done it before, and I will not start now.

I look at it quietly before moving to clean the area up.

I got what was salvageable, but it still wasn’t a lot. I couldn’t really focus, my vision was impaired not only from the tape holding my helmet together but also from the blood seeping through my head I was going to need them. I collected what I could, I didn’t look at the Water reclaimer knowing that it had been boiled away.

I started to limp my way to the Rover and once I got in, the camera had automatically turned on. I waited so that I could take off my helmet and once I did, I rubbed my left eye seeing the blood on my hands.

I tried to control my fingers from trembling as I cleaned the wound and wrapped the ripped strips of clothing around my head. I really hope that it wasn’t a concussion. And when I was done I sat in the seat before taking a deep breath. I leaned forward wrapping my arms around myself and curled up, my knees under my head and I just shook.

I wasn’t crying, not yet anyway, but I was really close to it. I took in some shaky breaths, “Oh god, what do I do now?” I asked myself as I tried to think of a way out of this. I have to tell NASA, but how? How do I explain that my chances of surviving this, is near impossible now?

I hold my head in my hands trying to wrap my head over the situation before I started typing.

* * *

**NASA – Conference Room**

“The crops are dead…” Vincent started. He, Teddy, Annie, Mitch, and a team of others study the analysis reports. There was thick tension that was in that room as everyone held their breaths.

“Complete loss of pressure boiled off most of the water. Any bacteria that survived, died in the sub-zero temperatures when exposed to Mars’ atmosphere.” Vincent explained.

“How long does she have?” Annie asked.

“She can still eat the potatoes she has, she just can’t grow anymore. We estimate they’ll give her about 200 sols.”

“And rations get her to what? Sol 409?” Teddy asked.

Vincent nods, “With the potatoes, she can stretch to 609.”

“But she’ll be long dead before Sol 868.” Mitch said, he was devastated that this had happened.

“We’re going to have to launch as soon as possible. Which changes or travel time.”

“Prelim estimates call for a four-hundred fourteen-day trip.” Vincent said.

Teddy takes a moment to do some math, “It’s Sol 135 now, we need thirteen days to mount the boosters and perform inspections. Which gives Bruce and his team…forty-seven days to make this probe.”

“How long does it normally take?” Annie asked.

“Six months. Minimum.” Mitch said sharply.

“I’m going to let you call Bruce and give him the news.” Teddy said to Vincent.

“I’m going to tell the crew.” Mitch said, he got up and left.


	10. Watching (Name)'s Progess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Having found out that (Name) is actually alive, the crew is allowed to see the mayhem that she has created since having left for dead (an honest mistake). 
> 
> Let's see how the react to their crew member has progressed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This Chapter is just for pure enjoyment, not really working for the main plot, more like a side plot really. This chapter consists of the crew watching (Name)'s recordings over the course of being stranded on Mars. I hope you guys enjoy! 
> 
> Stay classy and safe darlings!

**The Hermes**

Everyone was sitting down in the rec room, they have made it that every day after finishing their tasks they would come to watch the video logs that (Name) had been creating since Sol 19. 

They sat watch Sol 31, “Of course she would bring that to Mars, how did no one else figure this out.” Martinez asked as he laughed at (Name) watching (Fav. Show) on the television.

“Can we talk about how she just stole all of our clothes?” Johnson said, but he was smiling too much to make it seem that he was angry. Once the log ended Johnson clicked on the one titled Sol 36.

(Name) walked into the Hab and started taking off her spacesuit, she looked at her plants before heading to the kitchen. She leaned on the counter by the microwave that she was using to cook a potato. “So here’s the rub..” She started.

“Where did she even get that from? Every single log she says it, I don’t think she even notices it.” Lewis laughed.

“Is it not an American saying? I thought it was completely normal.” Vogel said and Beck shook his head.

“No one says it.” He laughed.

“The problem is water. I’ve created one-hundred and twenty-six square meters of soil. But each cubic meter needs forty liters of water to be farmable. So, I have to make a lot of water.” She stops when the microwave beeps and takes out the tray and grabs a fork.

She turns around so she’s facing the camera, “Fortunately, I know the recipe. Take hydrogen, add oxygen, and then burn.” She winces.

“Unfortunately, burn…nothing good comes from doing that.” She explains.

“Wait…she doesn’t mean to…” Lewis starts.

“I have hundreds of liters of unused Hydrazine from the MDV. If I run the Hydrazine over an iridium catalyst, it’ll separate into N2 and H2…”

“She is.” Beck said. They watched as (Name) made a chimney with the items on board and sat down doing the math. Then they watch as (Name) is sitting crisscross on her bunk with all the pillows and blankets on board.

“Now, I just need to direct the hydrogen into a small area and burn it. Luckily, in the history of humanity, nothing bad has ever happened from lighting hydrogen on fire.”

Johnson snorts and Martinez laughs as (Name) gave a nervous smile to the camera. “But, believe it or not, the challenge has been finding something that will hold a flame. NASA hates fire because the whole “fire makes everyone die in space” thing.”

“She’s not serious, is she?” Beck said and that causes Johnson and Martinez to laugh louder.

“She completely is.” Vogel grins.

“So everything we brought with us is flame retardant. With the notable exception of Martinez’s personal items.” She holds up a cross with Jesus on it. “Sorry Martinez. If you didn’t want me going through your stuff, you shouldn’t have left me for dead on a desolate planet.” She shrugged but even though the situation was severe the smile that (Name) had told everyone that she was joking.

“But I figure you won’t mind, considering the situation.” She said and Martinez nodded his head with a fond smile.

“Of course I wouldn’t.” He said and Johnson wrapped his arm around his shoulder.

Some hours had passed as when (Name) turned the camera on this time, it was brighter in the day and she looked exhausted. She held a notebook in her hand and looked over the calculations she made before going over to light the wood on fire and placing it on the chimney.

They watched as she paused, “Wait, why do I feel like I forgot something.” But before they could blink there was a loud explosion happened. They watched in horror as their crewmate was blasted across the room and landed on the ground like a wet rag.

Lewis and Beck gasped and Johnson paused the video.

“D-Did that just happen?” Martinez asked.

“She blew herself up…She blew herself up?!” Johnson said in disbelief. He clicked play and (Name) twitched slightly and the camera cut out. It returned again after a second and this time (Name) just sat down.

They watched as there was smoke and steam coming off her, her hair was singed in patches and she was in a complete daze.

“So, yes. I managed to blow myself up.” She said quietly and started to pat the clothing she was wearing that was burned. “I forgot to account for the excess oxygen I was exhaling when I did my calculations.” She stopped and looked at the camera, “Because I’m stupid.”

Johnson and Martinez couldn’t help themselves as they started laughing.

Lewis glared at them, “This is not funny!” She exclaimed.

Martinez coughed as he stopped laughing, “No, it’s hysterical! How dumb can someone be to actually blow themselves up?”

“How could she have overlooked such a simple thing?” Vogel asked as if disappointed that (Name) actually forgot.

She sat back, closing her eyes clearly, she was still out of it, “Why did I have to record that…I’m so dumb. If my crew ever watch this Lewis will be about to murder me, Beck’s would have a heart attack and refuse to speak with me, I can already see Johnson and Martinez laughing at me. And Vogel’s gonna be so disappointed in me.” She shakes her head and there was a loud pop that came from her neck. She rubbed her eyes clearly exhausted and grabbing her singed her and pulling away the parts there were burned.

“Interesting side note: this is how Jet Propulsion Laboratory was founded. Five guys at Cal Tech were trying to make rocket fuel and nearly burned down their dorm. Rather than expelling them, Professor…Von Karman? I want to say…banished them to a nearby farm in Pasadena and told them to keep working. And now we have a space program.”

“This is not the time to be thinking about side notes.” Beck said, shaking his head. He was going mad with worry now.

She sat there blinking slowly and yawned, “I’m going to get back to work. Just as soon as my ears stop ringing.” She said and sat there.

“Oh my god…” Lewis pinched the bridge of her nose. She was going to kill (Name) for actually doing this.

They watched the next clip, this time (Name) was sitting at her station. It was obvious she had just gotten out of the shower as she was toweling her hair dry.

She looked at the camera as if she was in pain, “I’m definitely going to die up here…” She said and the crew tensed as she rested her head down, “If I have to listen to any more goddamn disco music.”

“What?” Lewis asked in shock. Turn the beat around was playing in the background.

“Jesus, Commander Lewis, you couldn’t have packed anything from this Century?” She asked exasperated and this time Beck started to laugh.

Turning to look at the commander, Lewis looked so offended. “WHY DID I GIVE JOHNSON MY MUSIC DRIVE?!” She yelled and hitting the spacebar and the computer stopped playing the music.

“I’m not turning the beat around. I refuse to.” She whined and grabbed a book and started reading.

“Hahaha. She’s so dramatic!” Johnson laughed and so did everyone else. Except for Commander Lewis, she was still offended.

The clip ended and it cuts forward, it’s been some hours as it was clearly nighttime. (Name) was sitting at her desk and she was using a compass and writing stuff down. “It’s time to start thinking long term. The next NASA mission is Ares 4. It’s supposed to land at the Schiaparelli Craters, 3200 km away.” She said as was tracing something on her map. “NASA presupplies each mission years in advance, so the MAV is already there, synthesizing fuel. In four years when the Hermes returns, I’ll have to launch from there. Which means I gotta get to the crater.”

The clip ends suddenly. Johnson clicks on the next one, this time (Name) is sitting in front of the camera, “So, I’ve got two rovers designed to go a max distance of 35 kilometers before they need to be recharged at the Hab. That’s problem A. Problem B is it’ll take me…roughly fifty days to make the journey. So I have to be able to live for fifty days. Inside a rover with marginal life support, the size of a small van. And yeah, problem C is if I don’t figure out how to make contact with NASA in the first place, none of this matters anyway. So…yes, in the face of overwhelming odds, I’m left with one option.” She pauses, “I’m going to have to science the shit out of this.”

“(NAME)!!” Martinez cries as he hunches over with laughter, Johnson joins him and they're both laughing until tears come out. Vogel smirks and shakes his head.

Lewis and Beck can’t believe it.

This clip ended suddenly as she got up and started changing into her spacesuit, but it showed the part of her midsection that hadn’t healed yet, it was red and looked rather painful.

Johnson clicked on the next clip and this time (Name) was in the rover and she was absolutely freezing with the cold nights of Mars. Her teeth were chattering and she was trembling from the cold, “Okay, so…success? I’ve doubled my battery life by scavenging Rover 1. But, if I use my heater, it’ll eat up half my battery power every day. If I don’t use my heater, I will slowly be killed by the laws of thermodynamics.” She gave a small, weak laugh and they could see her breath. “I would love to solve this problem but, I think my brain is frozen…” She pauses and unwraps her arms around her and she saw her fingers. They were starting to turn blue.

“No, I can’t. I’m calling it.” She said, turning on the heater and heading back to the Hab.

“Jesus Christ.” Beck said he was beyond-beyond worried now. Everything she was doing was so dangerous but if she doesn’t do them, she’ll die. He just wants her back, safe in his arms, and never let her go back to space ever again.

Johnson clicks on the one labeled Sol 71. This one showed (Name) the Rover while the sun was still out. “Okay, well good news: I may have a solution to my heating problem. Bad news: It involves me digging up the Radioisotope Thermoelectric Generator.”

“WHAT?!” Lewis exclaimed in shock as she stared wide-eyed at the screen.

“She’s kidding, right?” Beck joined her in complete disbelief.

“Afraid not.” Vogel said.

“Now, if I remember my training correctly, one of the lessons was titled, “Don’t Dig Up The Big Box of Plutonium, (Name)…” I understand that RTGs are good for spacecraft, but if they rupture around humans…no more humans. Which is why we buried it when we arrived and then planted that flag so we would never be stupid enough to accidentally go near it again…But, as long as I don’t break it…” She paused, “I almost said something stupid out loud.”

“That’s an understatement buddy.” Johnson sighed, the clip cuts to the camera inside the spacesuit. They watch as (Name) takes out the RGT from the ground and wrapping it carefully with a flame retardant sheet and strapped it into the back of the Rover. And she begins driving. The camera cuts to the original camera and then (Name) turns to the camera.

“I know this is dangerous but I’m not cold anymore. And I could choose to think about the fact that I’m warm because I have a decaying radioactive isotope riding with me, but there’s good news.” She grins as if she were a child in a candy shop and grabbed something from the seat next to her and it was a data stick. “I would like to present to you Doctor Christopher Beck’s data stick. I found this when I was looking through his stuff, at first I was looking for his books because I know that he brought some books on board when I found this and I looked through it. You’ll be surprised to hear what kind of music he likes.” She hits the play on the computer and Coldplay starts playing. “Beck, why didn’t you ever tell me you liked (Fav. Genre of Music)?!” She grins.

Beck felt his face flush and cover his face and adverts his eyes from the crew. Johnson is crackling and he had the faintest idea that it’s not because of the music he likes. But because that data stick was the one he specifically made for (Name) and had planned to give it to her before Sol 18 happened.

In the next logs, it was (Name) digging up Pathfinder and working like a madman trying to fix it. And when she did she made three boards and lined them away from each other. She was waiting and must have started dozing off because when they heard the whirling of Pathfinder she jolts. She rushes up to it and sees that it’s pointing to yes.

“Yes! Yes! Whoo!” She celebrates. This leaves the crew laughing at her childish antics.

The log cuts to (Name) cooking one of her potatoes in the microwave and sits down at her station, “Okay, so here’s the rub…Somehow, we need to have complex astrophysical engineering conversations using only a still-frame camera…from 1996.” She sighed and bites into the potato and they could see her face immediately shoot up in regret.

“Oh god, hot! Hot!” She yells covering her mouth with her hand as the potato in hand steams.

“(Name)!” Johnson laughs at his best friend as she burns her mouth. They chuckle until she looks somewhat embarrassed into to camera, “Anyways, as luck would have it, the camera does spin, so I can make an alphabet. Not our alphabet though, twenty-six characters plus a question card into 360 gives us a 13-degree arc. It’s too narrow. I wouldn’t be able to know what the camera was pointing at.” She pauses.

“Hexadecimals…Hexadecimals to the rescue.” She grins. The camera immediately cuts to (Name) sitting on Johnson’s bunk as she already has his container opened. She looks through it and the television was on showing (Fav. Show), one of (Name)'s favorite series of (Fav. Actor).

“Ladies and gents, I would like to present to you supernerd, Mark Johnson.” She starts.

“HEY!” Johnson exclaims offended.

“I.e: My Bestest friend on Mars.”

“Why are you her best friend?” Martinez asks, also offended and Johnson seems to smirk as if he wasn’t offended a few moments ago. “Because she likes me better.” He said smugly.

“I knew someone had to keep an ASCII table somewhere and I logged onto his laptop and started scrolling through it. He has copies of Zork 2 and Leather Goddesses of Phobos on his laptop.” She starts to laugh, “Johnson, you’re the biggest dork I’ve ever met. Seriously Johnson…It’s like the Smithsonian of loneliness here…And I thought _I_ had problems.”

Johnson gapes and Martinez loses it, “You’re right buddy. She is your best friend; she’s got you spot on there.”

“(NAME)!”

The crew starts laughing, and as they were going to head to bed there was an alert go off and Lewis leaned over to see that there was another video message. This time it was from Mitch. There was another video attached to it, and something inside her told her it was not good news.

She clicks on the video and it showed Mitch and he looked like he had been crying. Her stomach dropped, she feared the worst and so did the rest of the crew. He tried to collect himself as he took in a deep breath and then let out a shaky exhale.

“Hermes, I tried to get this to you as fast as I could but, there were some complications.” He tried to keep his voice steady but it cracked. “(Name) she…” He paused looking down at some papers.

“She isn’t…” Martinez started, he looked horrified.

“Wait.” Lewis said sharply, god, she hoped with every fiber of her being that he wasn’t implying what she thought he was.

Beck held his breath, no, please God, no.

“Under certain circumstances, (Name) has suffered what seems to be a minor concussion, a twisted left leg. We can’t be too sure as she is self-diagnosing herself, but we’re pretty sure that’s all that she has suffered. But the worst of it is that (Name) received these injuries when the airlock of the Hab breeched…with her inside of it. All her crops died and the water boiled off.” He explained and shook his head as he closed his eyes in pain.

“It’s not looking good, even if she rations it will only last her at most to 609 and we do not know when the probe will be finished. I will be connecting the Hermes signal and the Pathfinder tomorrow so that you can speak to her.” He said and started crying, he’s daughter-like figure is going to die and unless Bruce finishes that Probe ASAP, she won’t stand a chance.

“I…I will leave you to your thoughts. I included the newest recording that she sent us of the…accident. I need to go.” He said shakily and turned off the video.

The crew felt as if all the air in their lungs was taken away. The Hab was breeched, with (Name) inside of it. She was suffering from a minor concussion.

“Commander?” Vogel said softly.

Lewis felt frozen, she condemned someone under her to die.

“Commander.” Vogel said louder and that seemed to snap her out of it. Lewis didn’t look back at the crew knowing that they were feeling almost identical to her, she slowly presses the video.

It was obviously nighttime and (Name) was returning to the Hab to rest, she grabbed her toolbox and entered the airlock. They watched from the inside of her suit and there was a loud noise and (Name) immediately turned to it.

But it was too late, she and the airlock shot up into the sky, her body tossed around inside and then slammed against the wall and then when it lands she slams face-first into the wall hard enough where her faceplates cracks underneath the force and blood splatters. But it wasn’t over yet as the airlock starts rolling down what would be a hill.

She breathing erratically, hyperventilating, and yet she drags herself to the window. She lets out a gasp.

“15% oxygen levels.” That seems to make her scramble for _something._ She grabs onto the duct tape.

“10% oxygen levels.” She tears a piece of and desperately tries to cover the cracks.

“5% oxygen levels.” The suit blares out its alarm but (Name) _can’t_ find the last one.

“1% oxygen levels.” She smacked duct tape on her helmet and just before she would suffocate there was a beep.

“Oxygen levels returning to normal.” She breathing heavier now, and that is no shock. She almost suffocated, “No, no, nononono.” She repeats breathlessly as she stands up. She nearly fell and looking down they see her left leg bent awkwardly.

(Name) scrambles to the destroyed Hab, her crops all dead. They watched in horror as (Name) cleans up what she can before returning to the Rover. Once there, the clip ends only to show the remaining log from the Rovers Camera.

She takes her helmet off to show the injury that she received over her left eye, she cleans the wound and wrapped it with some of the ripped clothing she had. She sat on her seat before taking a deep breath, she leaned forward and wrapped her arms around herself and curled up. She was shaking, she hadn’t started crying but she was close to, “Oh god, what do I do now?” She asked herself.

She held her head before typing. She struggled to find the words as she kept erasing and looking at the screen. And after that, the dam was destroyed and she wept, without shame…it was heartbreaking. They’ve never seen her like this, to the point of just giving up, the closest thing they could think of was her second log where she spent most of the time in her bed, unable to move because of the injury but partly because she had given up.

Beck just wanted her back in his arms, safe and sound. He never wanted (Name) to feel like this ever again. Alone and heartbroken. He wouldn’t live with himself if he did.


	11. Communication Relay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, the crew is able to talk to one another, something that all of them needed.

**JPL -Night**

Bruce and his team sit around the phone, they just hung up with Vincent. They were shellshocked at the news. This wasn’t happening, right? This had to have been a mistake, but from what Vincent said, it didn’t seem like it.

“Okay.” Bruce started and there was a long pause, “Okay.” Everyone was at a loss for words. “I’m, uh…I’m going to need a change of clothes. We’re all going to need a change of clothes.”

* * *

**Sol 136 – Hermes**

“Dear (Name)…” Martinez typed on his terminal, everyone was closely watching the screen, they were finally in contact with (Name). After she had that experience last night. And to be honest, they were also struggling, they couldn’t sleep last night, wanting to talk to their crew member desperately.

“Apparently, NASA’s letting us talk to you now, and I hate to say it, but I drew the short straw…” That was a complete lie and everyone knew it, the only reason Martinez was writing was because Mitch connected it to his terminal. “Sorry we left you on Mars, but we just don’t like you. And we didn’t think that Mars wouldn’t be able to either.”

“Also, it’s a lot roomier on the Hermes without you. We have to take turns doing your tasks, but it’s only _botany_ , not real science.” Lewis smacked his shoulder, “I can and will take you out of that terminal if you’re going to joke around like that.” She warned, while she understood that Martinez was a jokester, she, and the rest of the crew were extremely concerned for her safety.

* * *

**Mars – Rover**

I read over the email that Martinez just sent and I felt tears welling up in my eyes. I gave a small laugh and decided to play along:

“Dear Martinez, you guys destroyed my plants, didn’t you?”

* * *

**Hermes**

“’Dear Martinez, you guys destroyed my plants, didn’t you?’ How did she already figure that out?!” He exclaimed causing the crew to laugh and then saw that (Name) typed more, “I had a hunch if your wondering and we can’t forget that I know you guys already, seriously, probably 24 hours without me left you guys to destroy all my hard work. But it’s okay, I’m just glad to be able to talk to you guys again…it’s lonely up here.”

Martinez read off and frowned, “I don’t know if the others are with you but please tell them I say hello. I managed to blow up not only myself up here but also the Hab.” There’s a slight pause, “How’s the Hermes anyways? Cramped and claustrophobic? Every day I go outside and look at the vast horizons, just because I can.”

“Does she think that we wouldn’t be here?” Beck asked, horrified at the implications.

“Well, Martinez did start out saying that he drew the short straw.” Lewis reprimanded.

“Alright, alright, sorry. Here I’ll fix it.” Martinez said before typing a response.

“Everyone is here with me, reading along. We’re super, super worried about you after watching your logs. We’re rooting for you, buddy. So we totally saw you exploding when trying to create more water, NASA was an ass for not getting in contact with you sooner. I’m definitely proud of you for what you said to them, on live no less. I’m sorry about your potatoes.”

There was an immediate response, “No potato talking, please.” And before they could apologize for mentioning it there was another response, “I don’t want to think about how many more days I have to eat them. I’m sick and tired of them, even if they are my food, I’ve been eating for nearly 100 days. And I’m about two nights away from getting a phobia.”

Johnson snorted, “Tell her that when she gets home I’ll buy her all of her favorite foods, no questions.”

* * *

**Mars - Rover**

“Johnson would like to tell you that once you come back to Earth he’ll be willing to buy your favorite foods.” I laughed at that, man, what I would do to get a milkshake right now. Or even to eat some pasta or pizza, anything that’s not potatoes.

“I look forward to it.” I wrote back.

* * *

**Hermes**

Everyone took turns writing to (Name) because Johnson nearly shoved Martinez off the terminal in his excitement of talking to (Name). Even though they had their own tasks to complete, they were willing to put it off if it meant that they could speak to their crew member.

Beck was the last one to be able to talk to (Name), he was worrying his head off, concerned about her injuries. But, as (Name) already seemed to know she wrote: “Beck if you're going to ask me about my injuries, as I’m sure you’ll want to. I have taken the liberty of sending separate logs to NASA about my well-being. Any injuries, thoughts and psychological trauma are included in them. They were rather long sessions that I had created about once to twice a week to make sure that I wasn’t going insane. I asked Mitch to send them up to you because you are technically still ‘my’ doctor. They should be on your laptop in about a few hours.”

Lewis gave a short laugh as she placed a hand on Beck’s shoulder, “She knows you too well, doctor.”

* * *

**Mars – Rover**

After spending almost two hours talking to everyone it was getting rather late and I still had work to do. It made me happy to talk to them, it was super lonely up here and I wanted to know how they were. I’m happy that they're okay.

And so here I was cleaning the mess that was inside the Hab, staring at the hole in the airlock. It took a while but I managed to find the canvas that was laying around and covered the hole. I strapped it in place with some duct tape that I had laying around and made a circular pattern. And while it wasn’t pretty, with luck it would help.

And so I waited a bit before repressuring the Hab. I watched as the canvas stretched as the pressure equalizes and hold my breath.

(Please…Please.)

The canvas holds.

And so now, I’m kneeling on the floor counting the potatoes that I had boxed up. I could hear the noise of the wind hitting the Hab and the sound that the canvas was making. I close my eyes shut, desperately I’m trying not to think about how my entire life is currently being held together by duct tape.

I take a deep breath counting in my head and writing down the numbers on pieces of paper that I had before placing them on top of the potatoes.

* * *

**NASA – Conference Room**

Teddy stood in front of the group of people that were working to save their astronaut. “Okay, let’s ask the…two hundred million dollars…sorry, five hundred…that’s a ‘Five’?” He asked, exasperated. “Let’s ask the very, very expensive question: is this prob gonna be ready on time?”

Bruce looks more exhausted than everyone else, he had dark bags under his eyes, he clothes rumpled and he blinked slowly, “We’re behind.”

“Give me a number.”

“Fifteen days. If I had another fifteen days, I could get it done.” Bruce said.

“All right, let’s create fifteen days. Thirteen days to mount the probe. Can we reduce?” Teddy asked.

“It…actually only takes three days to mount it. Which we can get it down to two, you said, right?” Vincent asks and Bruce nods. “But the other ten are for testing and inspections.”

“How often do these inspections reveal a problem?” Teddy asked and the room goes silent.

Everyone trades nervous glances.

“Are you suggesting that we don’t do the inspections?” Mitch asked incredulously.

“Right now I’m asking how often they reveal a problem.” Teddy said.

“1 to 20. But that’s grounds for a countdown halt. We can’t take that chance.” Vincent said.

“Anyone else know a safer way to but more time?” Teddy asked and no one could think of one. “Tell Dr. Keller to stretch (Last Name)'s rations four more days. She won’t like it, but that’ll get us to fifteen. And we’ll cancel the inspections.”

“Teddy…” Vincent warned.

“It’s on me, Vincent.” Teddy said before turning to Bruce, “You’ve got your two weeks. Get it done.” He ordered.


	12. Saving Grace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the Iris Prob failing, and the outcome looking bleak. There might just be a God out there that is looking and rooting on for (Name)'s survival.

**Mars – Hab**

I sit in front of my table after cooking up two potatoes and turned to the camera and I couldn’t even smile if I wanted to. I felt so upset with the news that NASA gave me, “So, I have to hold out until the probe gets here with more food. And if you’re wondering, this is was ‘minimal calorie count’ looks like.” I hold up one of the ration packs. “Standard issue ration. But instead of three every one day, I’m now only going to eat one every three days.”

I open the pack, “Oh, it’s meatloaf today.” I say offhandedly before cutting it into thirds, setting the other two aside for later. “And this is today allotment, which I will supplement with potatoes. Which I’m beginning to hate with the fiery passion of a thousand suns. And now I’ve been told to do this.” I hack off even more of the meager ration and half of a potato and set that aside.

I show the plate of food that looks even smaller than a baby portion, I give the camera a grim smile, “The point is, ‘stretch the rations four more days’ is a horrible punch to the dick.” I grab the ketchup that I hadn’t touched yet, “I’ve been forced to use ketchup and other condiments that I strongly dislike to at least taste something that isn’t the potato’s bland taste.” I ate quietly and watched a little bit more of (Fav. Show) before going to bed.

* * *

**Cape Canaveral – NASA**

The Probe was now mounted on the booster and is readied to launch. The final supplies, food, water, clothing, medical gear, tools, anything that they could think of was in that probe.

Mitch stood in the room looking around at all the nervous faces. (God, please let this work.) He puts on his headset, “This is Flight Director, begin Launch Status Check.”

“Roger that, Houston…” Launch Control says and Mitch runs through the status check.

* * *

**Mission Control – NASA**

Teddy watched the countdown from the observation room. He looks over the speech that he made that was for a successful launch. He closes the launch in a blue folder as the timer counted down to 00:00:15…

“This is Flight. We are go for launch on schedule.” Mitch said.

10…9…

Vincent leaned against the wall, breathing deeply.

8…

Annie paced in front of the nine televisions that she had in her office.

7…6…

Bruce sat with his engineers, all of them in rapt attention.

5…4…3…2…1…

Liftoff. Clamps were released and the booster fires –

Cheers course through the room. Team members congratulate each other, but the Launcher Interface frowns at his station. “Getting a little shimmy, Flight?”

“Say again?” Mitch asks.

A violent shimmy rattles the payload as the craft accelerates. The bolt at the forefront cracks-

As the first stage depletes its fuel, it jettisons the stage clamps. As the stage begins to fall away from the shimmying craft, it catches hold, swinging unnaturally to the side.

The second stage engines ignite—

WHOOSH—

The acceleration shakes the craft. The bolt shears clean off—the payload rocks—the other four bolts snap—

The prob slips from its supports, and slams into the hull—

* * *

**NASA – Control Room**

Alarms and lights flash across the consoles, and the room erupts in urgent voices from the floor.

“We lost reading on the probe, Flight.” Comms said before there was a pause, “Loss of signal, Flight.”

The probe explodes and all the screens show the people’s worst nightmare:

**L.O.S.**

Mitch puts his head in his hands as he feels tears in his eyes.

* * *

**Mars – Dawn**

I sat outside for once, I walked over the hill silently. The sun was just coming up as I felt tears welling up in my eyes. I just created the six logs, each to my crew members as a last will and testament in case I wasn’t going to survive up here.

It was probably the hardest thing I’ve ever done, and I wasn’t going to send it. Yet. But every outcome had to be made. Just in case. But I wrote one message and specifically sent it to Lewis’s computer so only she could read it.

_‘So, um, Commander Lewis. I need you to do something for me. And you’re the only person I can ask for this, I need you to check on my parents. They’ll want to hear about our time on Mars first-hand. I’ll need you to do that. It won’t be easy talking to a family about their dead daughter. And I know that it’s a lot to ask, and that’s why I’m asking you. I’m not giving up, I’m planning for every outcome. Please tell them I love what I do and I’m really good at it. And I’m dying for something big and beautiful. And greater than me._

_Tell them I said I can live with that.’_

* * *

**China National Space Administration**

On the television Teddy and Vincent were answering questions from reporters, “…we substituted protein cubes for standard rations. The thrust of the launch, combined with the simultaneous lateral vibration, liquefied the cubes and created an unbalanced load.” Vincent explained.

“Why wasn’t this accounted for in the inspection phase?” The reporter asked.

Vincent glanced at Teddy, “In order to make our launch window, we were forced to accelerate our schedule.” Teddy responded.

“You skipped the inspection?” The reporter asked in horror.

“Yes.”

Guo Ming, Director of CNSA, watched the screen, “Their astronaut is going to die.” He said.

“Perhaps, perhaps not.” Zhu Tao, the Under-Director of CNSA began, “The Taiyang Shen’s booster. Our engineers have run the numbers, and it has enough fuel for a Mars injection orbit.

Guo Ming turns to the woman in shock, “Why hasn’t NASA approached us?”

“They don’t know. Our booster technology is classified.” The woman responds.

“So if we do nothing...”

“The world would never know we could have helped.”

“Then, merely for the sake of this argument, let’s say we decide to help them…” He began.

“We’d be giving up a booster and effectively canceling Taiyang Shen.”

Guo considers this, “We need to keep this among scientists. A cooperation between space agencies…”

* * *

**Teddy’s Office – NASA**

Teddy was on the phone standing at the window as he listened to the voice on the other end detailing the terms. He closes his eyes as relief rushes over him.

“Yes.” 

He hangs up and sits on his chair, his heart racing. This was it. This was finally it.

* * *

**JPL – Laboratory**

Bruce stands at the white boards, addressing the department heads. He’s energized and writing like a madman while he talks, “Alright, thanks to our friends in China, we get one more chance at this. We finished the Iris Probe in sixty-three days. Now we get to do it again in twenty-eight…”

* * *

**NASA – Vincent’s Office**

“We’re jettisoning any sort of landing system—the idea is we’re only sending rations, so they can crash land on Mars…” Vincent’s talking on the phone when his secretary says something loudly.

A male barges into his office and Vincent turns to him in surprise, “You should hang up the phone.” He says and stops his secretary.

“I’m sorry—who are you?”

“My name is Rich Purnell and I work in astrodynamics and you should hang up the phone right now.”

Vincent stares at him, “I’ll call you back.” He said before hanging up the call.

Rich hands Vincent his summary.


	13. Project Elrond

**NASA – Conference Room**

Annie hurries into the briefing room, Vincent Rick, Bruce, and Mitch are already there. She’s reading the email on her phone, “What the hell is ‘Project Elrond.’”

“I had to make something up.” Vincent said defensively.

“Elrond?” She repeats, not understanding.

“Because it’s a secret meeting.” Mitch said and Annie turns to him.

“How do you know that? Why does ‘Elrond’ mean ‘secret meeting’.”

“The Council of Elrond, from The Lord of the Rings. It’s the meeting where they decide to destroy the One Ring.” Bruce explained.

“I so quit right now.” She said and everyone laughed at her.

“If we’re calling something Project Elrond, I would like my codename to be ‘Glordindel.’” Teddy said as he entered the room.

“Oh my god, I hate every one of you.” She said.

“Do you really not know Lord of the Rings?” Mitch asked.

“Tell them exactly what you told me.” Vincent said pushing Rich.

“I can get the Hermes back to Mars by sol 561.” He said and the whole room stilled. Wait…what? Jesus. It’s as though Rich just dropped a bomb in the room.

“What?” Mitch said affronted.

“How?” Teddy asked in disbelief.

Rich looks around the room and grabs items off the table to demonstrate. “Okay…let’s pretend this stapler is the Hermes. And you are…I’m sorry what’s your name again?” He asked looking at Teddy.

“Teddy. I’m the Director of NASA.”

“Okay, Teddy, you’re Earth. And right now the Hermes is heading towards you and is about to start its month-long deceleration to intercept. But, instead, I’m proposing…”

He stops as he goes over to Teddy quickly, “We start _accelerating_ immediately, to reserve velocity and gain even more. We don’t intercept Earth at all, but we come close enough to use a gravity assist to adjust course. While we’re doing that…” He grabs the pen out of Teddy’s pocket, “We resupply with the probe—”

“Taiyeng Shen.” Vincent says and Rich nods.

“Pick up whatever provisions we need…and then we’re accelerating towards Mars.” He does a slingshot maneuver around Teddy and goes over to Annie, “You’re Mars. And we’re going too fast at this point to fall into orbit, so it’s a flyby.”

“What good is a flyby if we can’t get (Last Name) off the surface?” Bruce asked.

“(Last Name) would have to intercept using the MAV.” Vincent says as he uses his pen to blast off Annie’s forehead. Rich catches it and points everything back towards Teddy.

“And we head back home. I’ve done the math; it checks out.”

The group sits in stunned silence. Teddy’s the first one to grasp the full magnitude of what they’ve just proposed. He locks eyes with Vincent before looking at the young man, “Rich?”

“Yes sir?” Rich asks.

“Get out.”

Rich immediately leaves the room in fear that he’ll lose his job or the loss of an appendage.

“Is he right?” Teddy asked.

“I believe so, all the math checks out.” Vincent said.

“And we need to use the Taiyeng Shen?”

“Yes.”

“What am I missing? Why is that important?” Annie asked.

“Because we can only do one.” Vincent says.

“Send (Last Name) enough food to last until Ares 4, or send Hermes back to get her right now.”

Vincent nods, “Both plans require the Taiyeng Shen, so we have to choose.”

“What about the Hermes crew? We’d be asking them to add…533 days to their mission.” Annie said doing the math.

“Yeah, and they wouldn’t hesitate. Not for a second.” Mitch said confidently.

Vincent nods his head, “That’s correct.”

“But bullshit. It should be Commander Lewis’ call.”

“It’s a matter of life and death, Mitch we need to make this decision.” Teddy said.

“She’s the Mission Commander. Life and death decisions are her damn job.” Mitch said angrily.

“Can the Hermes function for 533 days beyond the scheduled mission end?” Teddy asks.

“It should. The Hermes was made to do all five Ares missions, so it’s only halfway through its lifespan.” Vincent says.

“But if something went wrong…” Annie said horror-struck.

“We would lose the crew. And the Ares program with them.” Teddy said.

“So…what? We either have a high chance of killing one person or a low chance of killing six people. How do we make that decision?” Bruce asks.

“We don’t. Teddy does.” Annie said and all eyes turn to Teddy. The room sits in silence as Teddy closes his eyes to think.

“We still have the chance to bring five astronauts home safe and sound. I’m not risking their lives.” Teddy said and Mitch glares at him.

“Let them make that decision.” Mitch seethes.

“Mitch, we’re going with option one.” Teddy said.

“You’re a goddamn coward. Half of NASA and most of the world is still furious at us because we left (Name) on Mars and everyone is angry at you for not doing the inspection. And now you’re making a decision that isn’t for you.”

* * *

**Mars – Hab**

I was shaking, as I turned on the camera, I don’t think that I’ll ever show anyone this but, I have to say this. I have to make a log of it before I loss my mind. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t…I…

“Okay, okay.” I breathe as I sat in my chair, “(Name) here…um…well, I don’t think I’m ever going to let anyone see this because I’m going to delete it afterward but I just need to say this…” I pause, trying to get my breathing even.

I’m trembling so hard that the table is shaking slightly, “I…I can’t do this…not anymore.” I say helplessly, “Everyday…I wake up and I have to battle myself to actually get up. And each day…it’s harder to do it.” I sniffled.

“I can’t pretend…not anymore…I can’t, I won’t, it’s too painful. I stashed the morphine that Doctor Beck had and I swore to myself that I wouldn’t do it. But…the possibility of dying was so high in the beginning that I had to make fail-safes…And I told myself that if I was going to die then…I would be a inject myself with enough to make it lethal.” I pause as I started crying.

I end the log abruptly as I struggle to get my spacesuit on and walk over to the top of the hill, sitting down, I closed my eyes. Just this once.

XXXX

I haven’t moved from my spot as the sun was beginning to set, the temperature alarm that my suit had was beginning to blare and I override it. I sit in silence, looking at the setting sun when something metallic shines. I get up and walk towards it, it’s Vogel’s specimen drill.

I pick it up carefully and see the holes drilled in the rock formation. My finger touches the unfinished work gently and a smile comes over my face.

* * *

**NASA – Mission Control**

Mindy watched as (Name) was making her way to the Rover, “She’s been doing EVAs throughout the day. Vincent watched over her shoulder, “There’s a pattern to them. He goes out three hundred meters, stops, three hundred more, then stops.”

“And nobody gave her instructions? Did JPL schedule something?” Vincent asks and frowns when Mindy shakes her head.

“She’s at the Rover.” She pauses, “We’re receiving a transmission.” She pulls it up on the screen, it’s a jumble of numbers and data. “Chem analysis…sample batch 1A-7C…”

Vincent blinks, he looks at the Rover that was holding the lone figure in admiration, “Commander Lewis’ geo-compositing experiments. She’s finishing the mission.

* * *

**Mars – Hab – Night**

I deleted the last log without a hint of hesitation and after calming down I sat down at the experiment table, crushing the rock samples and testing them with my chemistry set. I was still upset, granted, but at least my brain was just filled with the thoughts of the morphine that I had hidden away.

“So, we evac’d eighteen sols into a thirty-one sol mission…Which means we’ve got thirteen sols of experiment and research schedules, for each of us. So, Commander Lewis…your works in good hands. Beck—going to be completely honest with you, I don’t really understand chemolithotrophic detection, as much. But I’m doing my best. Johnson, I know you’re picky with the ChemCam, but guess what? I’m touching the ChemCam. Vogel, I think I’ve got a new cataloging system for the core samples. Don’t know what to call it because I kind of want to name it after the Fatherland. And Martinez…you’re the pilot so I don’t know what you do on your downtime.” I paused for a moment looking at the rock before turning to the papers on hand.

“I’m trying to keep everything documented and organized. I know that’s not exactly my strong suit, but I want it all to make sense, in case…you know. Maybe you can teach it in class someday. The (Last Name) Syllabus: ‘How to Make a Bathtub Using NASA Tubing and an Old RTG.’ Or ‘How to Cook a Potato Six-Thousand different Ways.’ Or ‘How to Make Water Out of Rocket Fuel. To Keep You Alive. For Just a Little Longer.’” I laughed slightly, “Or: ‘How to Take Your Mind Off the Lethal Dosage of Morphine You have Hidden in Case of Emergency Exit.’” I shook my head at that one.

Just for Emergencies…

* * *

**Hermes – Flight Deck**

Vogel was running a diagnostic check on the ship's engines and as he was finishing up, he finally looked at his emails. The was a different type of email, it was from Mitch and when he tried to open it, he couldn’t.

“Johnson, I know that you don’t like being bothered during your rec time but can I ask you to help me.” Vogel asked over radio to Johnson.

“Yeah, no problem, come to the Gym and I can help you out.” Johnson said as he got off the treadmill.

“It’s an email from Mitch, it has a weird subject, but the computer won’t open the attachment.” Vogel explained.

“Let’s take a look.” Johnson said as he began working on the computer screen, “Huh, this isn’t a jpg. It’s a plain ASCII text file. Looks like…I don’t know what this looks like. Math equations? Does this make any sense to you.

“'Rich Purnell Maneuver.' Ja, it is a course maneuver for the Hermes.


	14. Plans in Motion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now that the crew accepted the Rich Purnell Maneuver, everyone has to work hard so that all six astronauts return home.

**NASA – Teddy’s Office**

Teddy stood staring at the window when Mitch entered, “Annie will go before the media this morning and inform them of NASA’s decision to reroute the Hermes to Mars.”

“That seems like a smart move, considering the circumstances.” Mitch said.

“You may have killed the whole crew.” Teddy says sharply.

“The person who gave them the maneuver only passed along information. The crew made the decision on their own.” Mitch said ignoring the look that Teddy shot him.

“We’re fighting the same war. Every time something goes wrong, the world forgets why we fly. I’m trying to keep up airborne. This is bigger than one person.”

“No. It’s not.” Mitch said spoke, calmly. He knew that it wasn’t.

(God, I hope you’re right.) Teddy falters, “When this is over…I’ll expect you resignation.”

Mitch took a beat, “I understand.”

“Bring our astronauts home.” Teddy said turning around.

* * *

**Sol 219**

“Every Ares mission requires three years of presupplies…” I look at the camera, “…So NASA figured out it’s a lot easier to ship some of this stuff ahead of time rather than bring it with us SO, as a result, the MAV for Ares 4 is already waiting at the Schiaparelli Crater. And the plan is to use it to launch me into orbit just as the Hermes is passing. And then, I guess…they catch me? In space?”

I shrug slight in confusion, it does sound awesome though.

“Anyways, that’s not really my problem right now. First, I have to get there. And it’s 3,200 kilometers away. So I have 200 sols to figure out how to bring everything here that’s keeping me alive—the Atmospheric Regulator, the Oxygenator, and the Water Reclaimer—along for the ride. Luckily, I have the brainpower of the entire planet Earth helping me with this endeavor. SO far we’ve come up with, ‘Drill holes in the roof of your rover and then hit it with a rock’.”

I pause, “We’ll get there.”

x-x-x-x-x

I’m in my spacesuit with both cameras that are in my suit and in the rover on, I hold a large Rock Sample Drill like a jackhammer, drilling holes through the roof and I’m exhausted, it’s so hard. It’s been about 700 holes that I’ve made around the edge of the roof. I finally finish the last one.

They said that I need a rock and I made the metal break in the space between the holes and after doing that until my hands practically ached I stood up. I shifted my weight feeling the metal go under slightly.

A couple of jumps should do it.

I stomped on the metal and it definitely moved. I did it again, feeling it give way. I full-on jumped this time and as I hit the metal, crashed through the roof of the rover. My body slammed against the chair and I could only gasp at the sudden action.

I shimmed my way out of the rover removing the metal and looking at all my headwork. After taking a photo of the rover I sent it to NASA.

Taking a little break I took inventory of my rations and I labeled two of them, ‘Birthday’ and ‘Goodbye Mars’. And I set them aside.

* * *

**Hermes**

Martinez was talking to his wife on the screen, she was upset, “533 days longer? And you said yes to this?” She asked upset.

“I did. She would have done the same for me, you know that. It’s (Name).” Martinez said.

“And you think I’m going to forgive you?” She asked, while her baby sat on her lap smiling at his dad.

“I do.” Martinez said and slowly her frown left and she gave a small smile, “Yeah, she would.” She holds her hand up to the screen along with their son and Martinez does the same motion.

x-x-x-x

Johnson sat on Beck’s bunk as the doctor was on his laptop looking at the video logs (Name) has made. Johnson snorted when he heard the female laugh at a horrible joke that she made. He would have been watching but he found some photos that Beck had. Some of them were when before they went into training for Ares 3, they went around spending time with one another. But one of them caught his attention. He looked at the back of it, _‘One Year Anniversary’ ♥♥♥_ in (Name)'s handwriting. He flipped the photo over. In the photo Beck was kissing (Name)'s cheek as she laughed at something. She was holding a cupcake in her hands, the frosting was (fav. color) so he could guess that it was (fav. flavor). It had a little decorative sign with a heart on it.

He picked another one up and started laughing when he saw that (Name) threw the cupcake at Beck’s face so his entire was covered in frosting. In the next one, she was kissing him with the frosting and all.

“What’s so funny?” Beck asked as he paused the log that he was watching, it was the one that (Name) made to make sure that her rationing was going fine. He was worried, he was worried that she was going to be underweight if they keep up her food rationing.

He turns around and Johnson was holding up three photos, he looked at them, feeling a blush came over his face as he took them back. “Those are private!” He exclaimed and before he could grab them Johnson let out another laugh.

“Man, if I didn’t have the proof right here, I would have never believed that the two of you were dating.” Johnson looked at the photo, “When was this taken?” He asked curiously.

“Two years ago.” Beck said softly, as he looked at the last photo of him and (Name) kissing, he could remember that day vividly. (Name)'s best friend had made them cupcakes to congratulate them for their one year, with (Name)'s (fav. flavor) frosting. He kissed her cheek to show his affection and the minute that he did. He received a cupcake on his face. He didn’t have time to yell as (Name) grabbed onto him and gave him a kiss.

He didn’t even care that he had a face full of frosting, he wrapped his arms around her body and they laughed as they broke apart. They both had frosting on their faces and he would never exchange that moment for anything.

“I just hope I can make it up to her.” He whispered to himself.

Johnson wrapped an arm around his shoulder, “Well, we’re going to get her. That’s a start.”

* * *

**Sol 461**

It’s been a very, very long time now, there were problems that had arisen during that time but it worked out, mostly. I followed NASA’s instructions carefully and was fine. Well…for the most part.

When I had started this mission 461 sols before I was at a great 57 kg (125.6 lb.), the average for my height, but now I was a scary 41 kg (90 lb.) I was super underweight right now. It was understandable because of the rationing that the doctors had given me, but still this was not healthy. For the most part I had been eating less than a single ration a day to make sure that I didn’t starve yet. But now, my body is so used to the amount of food that I’m terrified about how I’m going to eat regular-sized meals.

It’s been over six months since the Rich Purnell maneuver was put in place, six months of merely surviving. I turned on the camera as I finally put on Lewis’ jacket, which was big on me. And she was a very skinny woman. I’m still using the clothes of my crew members because most of mine had been destroyed, intentionally or accidentally.

I usually wear Martinez’s clothing to bed because they're some of the biggest, on cold nights I wear Beck’s or Johnson’s and usually when I’m working I use Lewis’s because they're rather flexible.

“I’ve been thinking about laws on Mars…There’s an international treaty saying no country can lay claim to anything that’s not on Earth. Any by another treaty, if you’re not in any country’s territory, maritime law applies. So Mars is ‘International Waters’.” I stepped over some equipment I had laying around.

All major equipment was stripped for parts, the canvas I had to cut, re-glue, making the tent lopsided in places, “NASA is an American non-military organization, and it owns the Hab. So, as soon as I step outside, I’m in international waters.”

I look at my reflection, I had grease and grime on my face, my hair frazzled and I was pretty disgusting to look at, to be quite honest. I had rationed hygiene products as much as I could but it was hard, but I saved enough to have a very nice shower on my last day here. My cheeks were gaunt and hollow and I was pale.

“Here’s the cool part. I leave this morning for the Schiaparelli crater, where I will commandeer the Ares 4 lander. Nobody explicitly gave me permission to do this, and they can’t until I’m aboard the Ares 4. So I will take control of a craft in international waters without permission. Which, by definition, makes me a pirate.”

I gave a grin, “(Name) (Last Name), Space Pirate.”

It’s better than winning the Nobel Prize.

* * *

So it’s my last moments on the Hab, I cut my hair nicely to at least make me feel less like a monster that rolled from the deep end. Afterward I was organizing the boxes that I had full of equipment. I struggled to get into my spacesuit because it was so big on me. There was a lot of room between my body and the suit that I had to wonder if it was going to cause problems. I perform the final shutdown, making sure that all my crew members would at least receive the last logs that I dedicated to them.

Just in case.

Everything in the Hab goes dark and as I depressurize the Hab I stare at it. (Thank you for keeping me alive.)

And so now, I open Rover 2, I filled it with frozen potatoes and salvaged equipment and anything that I needed. I put the remaining rations that I had stored in a box and shut the door close.

I climb into Rover 1, power up the system and head towards the horizon.

In the next couple of days I would take my camera to talk to, know that I can’t really make any logs. “Everywhere I go, I’m the first. It’s a strange feeling.” I said softly as I leave my footprints into the red dirt. “Step outside the Rover? First person to be there. Climb that hill? First person to do that.”

I was looking up at one of the Martian moons to find my way.

“Four and a half billion years…nobody here. And now…me. I’m the first person to be alone on an entire planet.” I say as I sat down, waiting for the Rover to recharge. “And I don’t ever want this to happen again. Not to me, not to anyone. There will always be a point in our lives when we just…want to be alone. I know I have, when frustration and anger take over me, I believed that being alone, without anyone would be a great place to be. But now that I know what it feels like, I regret ever thinking that way. It’s a horrifying place to be. And I don’t want to be alone anymore.”


	15. The Final Days on Mars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Preparations are being completed, everyone working hard to get astronaut (Name) (Last Name) off of Mars and on the way back home.

**NASA – Mission Control**

Mindy was watching (Name)'s caravan makes its way around the impressive Marth Crater. “How’s our girl doing?” Vincent asks as he approaches the bespectacled woman.

“So far, so good. She’s sticking to schedule, drives for four hours before noon. Then sets up the solar panels and waits 13 hours while they recharge. She sleeps somewhere in there and starts again.” Mindy explained.

“How’s her moral?” Vincent asks.

“She keeps us updated on her thoughts and after the incident four months ago she’s been doing a lot better. She’s asked us to call her ‘Captain Martian’.”

Vincent tilts his head slightly, “Mars would be governed by Maritime law, so technically—”

Mindy laughs slightly, “Yeah, she explained it to us.”

* * *

**Sol 494 -Vincent’s Office**

Vincent looks at the stack of paperwork that was dropped in front of him, the top one was a diagram for the MAV.

“Okay, we’re going to start by stating, for the record, that you’re not going to like this.” Bruce said and Vincent starts to looks through the plans.

“The problem is the intercept velocity. The Hermes cannot enter Mars orbit, or they’ll never have enough fuel to make it home. The MAV is _only_ designed to get to Low Mars Orbit. So in order for (Name) to escape Mars’ gravity entirely and intercept the Hermes…” Mitch starts.

“She needs to be going fast.”

Bruce nods, “Which means we need to make the MAV lighter. **A lot** lighter. Five-thousand kilograms lighter.”

“You can do that?”

Bruce gives him a look. (Well, that depends on your definition of ‘do that’, Vincent.)

“There were some gimmes right off the bat. The design presumes 500 kilograms of Martian soil and samples. Obviously, we don’t need that.”

“There’s just one passenger instead of six. With suits and gear, that saves another 500. Then we ditch the life support. We don’t need it, we’ll have (Last Name) use her EVA suit for the whole trip.” Mitch said.

“How will she use the controls?” Vincent asks.

“She won’t. Martinez will pilot the MAV remotely from the Hermes.” Mitch explained.

“We’ve never had a manned ship controlled remotely before.”

“If we go remote, we can lose the control panels. Then we dump the secondary and tertiary comm systems.” Bruce continued.

“You’re going to have a remote-controlled ascent with no backup comms?” Vincent asked wide-eyed.

“He’s not even to the bad stuff yet, Vincent.” Mitch said, and he totally understood where Vincent was coming from. But this was the only way to get her back.

“We have to remove the nose airlock, the windows, and Hull Panel 19.” Bruce said.

(What?)

“You’re taking the front of the ship off?” Vincent asked in horror.

“Sure. The nose airlock alone is 400 kilograms.”

“You’re going to launch a human into space with a giant hole in the front of the ship?” Vincent asked again.

“Well…no. We’re going to have her cover it with the Hab canvas.”

Vincent puts his head in his hands.

“The hull’s mostly there to keep the air in. Mars’ atmosphere is so thin you don’t need a lot of streamlining. By the time the ships going fast enough for the air resistance to matter, it’ll be high enough that there’s practically no air.” Bruce continued.

“You’re sending her to space under a tarp.”

“Yes. Can I go on?” Bruce asked.

* * *

**NASA – Mission Control**

Mindy and Vincent were waiting for (Name) to respond, Mitch was with them at his station.

_Rover: Are you f---ing kidding me?_

Mitch huffs a laugh as he grins at (Name)'s response. Of course she would write something along those lines.

* * *

**Sol 538**

I was staring at the camera wondering if the people of the JPL were trying to kill me or they were trying to save me. Because from their plans it seems like the former. “I know what they’re doing. I _know_ what they’re doing. They keep repeating ‘Accelerating faster than any human in the history of space travel’ like this is a good thing, like that'll distract me from how insane their plans is. Oh really? I get to be the fastest human in the history of space travel? **You’re launching me into space in a convertible.** No, no, it’s worse because I don’t have any controls. You’re launching me into space in a tin can. And by the way, physicists don’t use words like ‘fast’ when describing acceleration, so they’re **only doing it** in hopes I won’t raise any objections because I like the way ‘fastest human in the history of space travel’ sounds. Well, you know what…”

I pause, sighing, “I do like the way it sounds but man, am I wondering if they’re actually trying to save me at this point.”

x-x-x-x

I stood at the base of the MAV and I struggled to get in but after a bit, it worked. I tore off the acceleration chairs from the cockpit throwing them out and I could hear the WHUMP as it hit the dirt. I tore the control panels throwing them out as well.

I glance outside for a second to see how much the pile has grown.

* * *

**Hermes**

Martinez was doing a flight simulator at his station and it was not going well. **COLLISION WITH TERRAIN** blinked in angry red letters on his screen.

“And…you killed her.” Johnson said.

Lewis sighed, if Martinez didn’t get the hang of this soon that (Name) could actually be killed, and that was something that no one wanted.

Martinez sighed angrily at himself, he needed to this correctly or else…he didn’t want to think about the alternatives. “One more time…” He said and reboots the simulator.

* * *

**Mars – MAV**

I pried one of the MAV’s hull panels free before pushing the nose airlock free and it tumbles down I sighed in relief and put on the canvas. I sat down on a hill, exhausted as finally…finally, I was done.

* * *

**Sol 560 – Hermes**

“Here’s the plan…” Lewis began looking over to her crew members, “Martinez will fly the MAV. Vogel will sysop the ascent. Beck and Johnson, I want you in Airlock 2 with the outer door open before the MAV even launches. Once we reach intercept, it’ll be Beck’s job to get (Name).”

“She might be in bad shape. The stripped-down MAV will get up to 12 g’s during the launch. She could be unconscious and may have internal bleeding.” Beck said worriedly.

“Well, then it’s a good thing you’re our doctor. What’s the intercept plan?” Lewis asked.

“We finished attaching the tethers into one long line. It’s 214 meters long. I’ll have the MMU, so moving around should be easy.”

“How fast relative velocity can you handle?”

“Once I get (Name)? I can grab the MAV at 5 meters per second. 10 is like jumping on a moving train. Any more than that and I might miss.” Beck said.

“We’ve got some leeway. The launch will take 52 minutes before the intercept and it will take 12 minutes. As soon as (Name)'s engine cuts out we’ll know our intercept point and velocity.” Lewis said.

“Now, let’s go get our girl.” She grinned and everyone else smiled and cheered with her.

* * *

**Mars**

I sat inside the makeshift pressurized tent, finally getting all the dirt and grime off my body as I did impromptu shower in the Rover. I ate my last remaining ration pack ‘ _Goodbye Mars.’_

I ate in silence, just this once.


	16. Rescue Mission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (Name) is finally getting rescued.

**Sol 561**

People all around the world were watching the broadcast that NASA was giving to save astronaut (Name). Times Square was filled like New Year as everyone watched the ‘(Last Name) Rescue’.

In Mission Control Teddy, Vincent, and Annie watch from an observation area, “If something goes wrong, what can Mission Control do?” Annie asked.

“Not a damned thing.” Vincent said, “It’s all happening twelve light-minutes away. That means it takes twenty-four minutes for them to get the answer to any question they ask. The whole launch is twelve minutes long. They’re on their own.”

“Not that we have a choice, but…are we sure we want to be broadcasting this to the world? I mean, if something goes wrong—” She’s cut off.

“Yes. We want to be broadcasting this.” Vincent says resolutely.

Mitch takes his position when he hears Johnson’s voice, “Fuel Pressure green.”

All around the world people were watching this happening from Beijing to St. Petersburg.

* * *

**Hermes**

Lewis nods when Johnson gave her the okay, she waits a moment and keys the console, “About two minutes, (Last Name). How are you doing down there?” She anxiously, along with her crew wait for a response.

* * *

**Mars – MAV Cockpit**

I try desperately to keep my emotions in check, I haven’t heard anyone talk to me specifically in so long, and to know that it was my crew was even better. “It’s good to hear you voice, Commander. I’m eager to get up to you.” I said as genuinely as I could muster. My voice cracks slightly at the end but I couldn’t think about it now.

“Thank you for coming back for me.” I said as I let out a small sniffle.

* * *

**Hermes**

“We’re on the case. Remember, you’ll be pulling some pretty heavy G’s. It’s okay to pass out. You’re in Martinez’s hands.” She says as her eyes burn slightly with unshed tears at hearing (Name) again.

“Tell him…no barrel-rolls. Or I’m haunting him for the rest of eternity.” (Name) laughs slightly.

Lewis shakes her head slightly, “Copy that, MAV. CAPCOM…”

“Go.” Vogel said from his station, he was grinning at (Name)'s joke. It’s good to see she still had her sense of humor.

“Remote Command…”

Martinez lets out a laugh when he hears (Name), “No worries buddy.” He whispers to himself as he’s grinning in anticipation, “Go.”

“Recovery…”

Beck floats in the open airlock. Beneath him, the Red Planet stares at him innocently as if it didn’t make him believe that the love of his life was dead. That not just a year and a half ago, it didn’t make him go through such emotional trauma. But he couldn’t think that now, in a few minutes he was going to get his (Name) back in his arms. He’d be damned if he lost her again. “Go.”

“Secondary Recovery…”

Johnson was clamped to the floor behind Beck, this was it. He was getting his best friend back, he was finally going to get her back, they all were.

“Go.”

“Pilot…” Lewis said.

* * *

**MAV – Cockpit**

I strapped myself into my acceleration seat, I close my eyes as I felt my throat become clogged.

“Go.”

Around the world the crowds erupt in cheers as they hear (Name)'s confirmation.

* * *

**Hermes**

“Mission control, this is Hermes actual. We are go for launch, and will proceed on schedule. 10 seconds to launch…(Name).” Lewis said over COMMS.

“Main engines start.” Martinez says.

“8…7…mooring clamps released….” Vogel adds.

“About five seconds, (Name). Hang on.” Lewis reports.

* * *

**MAV**

I tense in anticipation, “See you in a few, Commander.” I smile.

“4…3…2…1…” Vogel counts down.

I was slammed back into my acceleration chair, the MAV launches upwards with incredible force.

And yes, as discussed, _in the history of space travel,_ no manned ship has ever accelerated with more force.

I couldn’t even gasp—the wind was knocked out of me. I struggled to keep conscious as the ship shook violently. I stared at the HAB canvas and I’m in horror as it begins to rip.

* * *

**Hermes**

“Velocity 741 meters per second. Altitude 1350 meters…” Vogel said.

“That’s too low.” Lewis states, her mouth agape.

“I know. It’s fighting me.” Martinez grunts as he struggles with the MAV.

“Velocity 850, altitude 1843.” Vogel said looking at his computer.

“(Name)? (Name), do you read? Can you report?” Lewis asked but she’s petrified when there’s no response.

* * *

**MAV**

But (Name)'s barely conscious – her eyes drifting from terrified to serene as she fades. The canvas rips free going to the Mars Atmosphere. The last thing (Name)sees before she drops unconscious are the stars…

* * *

**Hermes**

“She’s well below target altitude” Vogel shakes his head in anger.

“How far below?” Lewis asks.

“Working on it—Main shut down in 3…2…1…Shutdown.” Vogel said.

“Back to automatic guidance. Confirm shutdown.” Martinez says.

“(Name)? Do you read?” Lewis asks but there was no response from the other female.

“She’s probably passed out. She pulled 12 G’s on the ascent. Giver her a few minutes.” Beck said, but on the inside he was crawling underneath his skin wanting to know if she was okay. God…please.

“Copy.” Lewis responds.

“I have interval pings. Intercept velocity will be 11 meters per second.” Vogel said.

“I can make that work.” Beck said firmly. He was going to make it work, he won’t quit.

“Distance at intercept will be –” Vogel pales at the number, “We’ll be 68 kilometers apart.”

Beck gasps, his eyes wide, and turns to Johnson who was wearing a similar expression on his face, “Did he just say 68 kilometers? _Kilometers?”_ He repeated.

“Oh my god…” Martinez whispered breathlessly.

“Keep it together. Work the problem. Martinez, do we have any juice in the MAV?” Lewis asked.

“Negative, Commander. They ditched the OMS system to make launch weight.”

“Then we have to go to her. Vogel, time to intercept?” She asked.

“39 minutes, 12 seconds.”

“What if we point our attitude thrusters all the same direction?” She asked.

“Depends on how much fuel we want to save for attitude adjustments on the trip home.” Martinez said.

“How much do you need?” Lewis asked.

“I could get by with maybe 20% of what’s left.” Martinez said confidently.

“Vogel—” She starts.

“Use 75.5 percent of remaining attitude adjust fuel. That brings the intercept range to zero.” Vogel said.

“Do it.” She commands.

“Hang on—that gets the range to zero, but the intercept velocity will be 42 meters per second—”

“Then we have 39 minutes to figure out how to slow down. Martinez, burn the jets.” And the jets fire as the Hermes change course.

* * *

**MAV**

My eyes slowly flutter and I wince in pain as I slowly regain consciousness.” Underneath me the orbiting MAV offers an unobstructed view of Mars. The great red planet’s horizon stretches out forever as the wispy atmosphere gives it a fuzzy edge.

It’s breathtaking, awe-inspiring.

I gave it a huge middle finger, (Fuck you, Mars.)

I cough slightly, “MAV to Hermes…” I say quietly.

“(Name)?!” Lewis screams over the COMMS.

“Affirmative, Commander.” I say softly as it hurt to breathe.

“What’s your status?”

“My chest hurts…it’s really hard to breathe…I think I broke some ribs.”

“That’s a very possible thing to happen.” I heard Beck say and I felt tears in my eyes as I heard his voice.

“How are you?” I ask softly.

“We’re working on getting you. There was a complication during launch.” Lewis said and I looked to where the canvas should have been.

“Yeah, the canvas didn’t hold.”

* * *

**Hermes**

“I think it ripped early in the ascent.” (Name) said, her voice quietly said and they could -hear her struggle to breathe with what is most likely broken ribs.

“That’s consistent with what we saw.” Lewis says as Martinez nods.

“How bad is it, Commander?” (Name) asks, and it’s such a relief to hear her voice again.

“We’ve corrected the intercept range, but we’ve got a problem with the intercept velocity.” She says.

“How big of a problem?” (Name) asks. 

“42 meters per second.”

There’s a pause, “Well. Shit.” She curses under her breath. There’s another pause, “Is there another plan?”

“Working on it.”

No one speaks as they try to think of a plan, that is until the female that they’re trying to save says something, “What would happen if you blow the VAL?”

(What?)

“You want to open the Vehicular Airlock?” Martinez asked concerned.

“It would give you a good kick.” (Name) responds.

“Yeah. And it might blow the nose of the ship off in the process.” Martinez exclaims.

“And…all the air would leave. And we need air, to not die.” Johnson says.

“But if we seal the bridge and reactor room. We let everywhere else go vacuo.” Lewis said and Martinez looks at his CO in shock.

“Are you insane?” He asks

“If we point the ship at (Name) then we can direct the thrust.” Lewis said.

Martinez reads the numbers, “A breach at the VAL would decrease us to 29 meters per second.”

“And a relative velocity of 13 meters per second.”

“Beck—you hearing this?” Lewis asks.

After carefully planning, “Vogel, I need you to make a bomb.” Lewis said.

I immediately jumped, I tore off my straps as I struggled to float to the open nose of the MAV.

“Did you say ‘bomb’? You guys are making a bomb without me?” I asked.

“To be fair (Name), you managed to blow yourself up. _Twice_.” Johnson said and I laughed slightly and instantly regretted it with how hurt my ribs were.

“Commander…I feel obliged to mention that setting off an explosive device on a spacecraft is a terrible, terrible idea.” Vogel said.

“Can you do it?” She asked as she turned to the German male.

“Ja.”


	17. The Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, after being stuck on Mars, (Name) finally gets to see her crewmates again.

**Mission Control**

“Houston, be advised: we are going to deliberately breach the VAL to produce thrust.” Lewis’s voice rang out and the whole room erupted into chaos _WHAT DID SHE JUST SAY?_

And so, the plan to place the plan worked and then the bomb explodes and the Hermes decelerates and Beck and Johnson were slammed up against the wall, both in their EVA suits.

Martinez, Vogel and Lewis endure the deceleration in their chairs and after four seconds, the ship stabilizes—

“Bridge seal holding.” Vogel said.

“Damage?” Martinez asked.

“Worry about that later…what’s our relative velocity?” Lewis commands.

“12 per second.” Vogel states.

“Copy.” Beck said as he and Johnson get ready.

“What’s our intercept range?” Johnson asks.

Vogel stares at the calculations, that can’t be right. “312 meters.”

I gasp slightly, “You said 312?”

Beck turns to Johnson quickly, “If I don’t make it to her, you cut it, got it?” He knew that he sounded bossy but right now…he already thought that he lost her once, it would destroy him if he didn’t do everything he possible could to save (Name).

Johnson looked at him fearfully, he would be going against Lewis’ direct orders but…he nodded his head in understanding.

“Bring her home.” He pleaded and Beck nodded.

Beck turned to see out and he could see the MAV and looking closer he saw her…she was poking her head out of the nose of the MAV. “I have visual on the MAV.” And as soon as he said that their eyes locked. It’s been so long since he’s seen them that they still have the same effect of taking his breath away every time.

Beck went to open his mouth to say something when (Name) gives him a soft smile. “Trust me.”

* * *

(Name)'s voice rang out and before anyone could question her Beck watches as she slams a makeshift knife into her suit and air shoots out through the puncture. (Name)'s body soars out of the ship and Beck adjusts his course to get to her.

“Distance to target, 24 meters.” Vogel says.

Both astronauts struggle to get to one another their hands outstretched.

“Six meters to target…” Vogel said.

Just as they reach each other, Beck grabs onto her arm as tightly as he could. (Name) slams into his body and they float together, holding each other tightly. (Name) looks up to see Beck and gives him one of her best smiles, “Hey there handsome.”

Beck chokes back a sob, “I got her.”

Everyone erupts into cheers.

In Russia, in New York, China, everywhere, everyone was celebrating that they got the astronaut alive.

Beck doesn’t want to let go as Johnson pulls the tether back. “Everyone to Airlock 2.” Lewis commands and the three of them race down from the bridge to meet them. They don’t care that they’re not in suits and through the windows they see Beck and (Name) touch down in the airlock.

The outer airlock closes and (Name) promptly collapses, exhausted. Beck grabs onto her as the inner airlock opens. Martinez, Vogel, Lewis and Johnson race to grab (Name).

Supporting her, holding her.

“Hi guys.” I smile as tears fall down my face as all of them are helping me stand. Everyone was a mess, fighting back their tears.

“(Name)…(Name)…fucking…haven’t seen you in a while…” Johnson hiccups slightly.

“Yeah. What’ve you been up to?” Martinez asks, his voice cracking.

“Oh…you know, blowing myself up and flying like Iron Man in space…you know. Same old, same old.” I say teasingly.

CLICK.

I heard the sound of my helmet come off and I wince slightly waiting for a horrible reaction.

“I don’t understand how you smell so good.” Lewis said in shock.

I blink softly, “Really? I hate to break it to you but I haven’t had a good shower in about a year.”

“You smell so sweet.” Vogel said.

“Like candy.” Johnson said.

They hold onto each other “…I missed you guys.” I say before finally breaking into tears. “Thank you for coming back.”

* * *

After the reunion party Beck pulls me into the Medbay and was putting me through tests to make sure that I was still functioning as good as a human could after surviving for a year and a half on mars. Although, I’m sure that it’s against protocol to have people in the Medbay while checking the patient, but everyone chose to ignore it or just didn’t care.

Beck had me take a shower with Lewis’ help as I had sustained notable injuries including the broken ribs. After weighing which was really scary as I was severely underweight and missing key nutrients. He was drawing blood right now as I laid on the bed, my eyes felt heavy as exhaustion was creeping onto me like a wildfire.

Johnson and Martinez were on my right side with Beck who was sitting down drawing out about fifty million vials of blood. Vogel and Lewis were on my left and Johnson was telling me a story that I couldn’t really understand as I felt my eyes struggle to keep open.

Lewis placed her hand on over mine as she leaned down, “You can sleep, (Name). You’re safe.” She whispered quietly and I let out a small breath of relief as I felt my body relax significantly. There was never a day on Mars that I felt this way, for the first time in a long, long time.

I felt at peace.

The last thing I remember is my eyes shutting and a blank darkness consumed me.

* * *

**Sol 566**

I opened my eyes and everything was blurry, I was tired, a little ironic because I was sure that I slept for over a day or two. I blinked slowly as the room came into focus, the light seemed dim and the unfamiliar setting, wasn’t I still on Mars? Where am I?

I felt panic and I took a sharp intake and looked beside to see Johnson. Definitely not on Mars then…Hermes…I was on the Hermes, the crew. They rescued me, I tried to move my hand but everything was so painful.

“J-Johnson…?” I asked softly, my voice raspy from the lack of use. The man in question jumped, obviously startled, dropping the book he had in the process and standing up so quickly that the chair that he sat on fell backwards in a loud thud.

“(Name)!” He exclaimed as he rushed over, “You’re awake!” He began fretting over me like a mother hen. “Do you need anything? Wait, I’ll call Beck! We were waiting for you to wake up.”

I grabbed his sleeve, “Water, please…”

He instantly turned around to grab a water bottle that was there beside the bed and helped me sit up which was an agonizing process that made my ribs irritated. I touched the area and felt the rough texture of bandages that were wrapped around me.

After handing me a water bottle he went to the intercom, “Attention at Medbay, Patient’s awake.” He said and I snorted softly.

“Patient’s awake?” I asked and Johnson laughed slightly, “Yeah…I hate it that Beck needs us to specify what is happening with you when he’s not around. He’s the one mostly taking care of you, but he went to take his lunch break and I was next to monitor you.” He explained and gently pushed back the hair that I had stuck to my forehead.

“It’s the first time you’re woken up. We were worried because it’s been five days since we rescued you.”

My jaw dropped, “Five days?” I asked in shock.

“No worries (Name), Beck said it was perfectly normal after everything.” Johnson said as he sat on the bed beside me. He kissed my forehead, “I’m just glad that you’re awake. Most of us will be.” He grinned.

Not a second later Beck came rushing in along with the rest of the crew, I placed the water bottle on my lap as I smiled at them, “Hey guys.”

“Sleeping beauty finally awaken!” Martinez says and Johnson starts to laugh.

“Good to see you’re finally awake, (Last Name).” Vogel smiled.

Beck immediately went into Doctor mode and I let him do his work as I talked to the crew. “How are you feeling?” He asked.

“Sitting up hurts and I’m incredibly sore. Everything aches especially my ribs.” I said and he turned to get some painkillers.

“I’m upping the dosage now that your awake.” He gives me two pills and I take them. I laid down on the pillows as Beck took my water away and he was writing stuff down on the papers.

As soon as I laid down I felt another wave of exhaustion, just talking and sitting took so much of my energy that I couldn’t even stay awake so long. Lewis was saying something but I dozed off before hearing the end of it.

* * *

“And she’s asleep again.” Johnson said as he looked at the woman on the bed, her eyes shut as she took deep and even breaths.

“She’s exhausted, that’s not a surprise.” Martinez said.

“How long do you think she’ll be in this state Beck?” Lewis asked and Beck looked up from his papers.

“Not sure at the moment, my guess is that she’ll be in a cycle of waking up and staying longer and longer awake before she goes to sleep again. It’s normal for people in strenuous situations. She might wake up after another day or two if everything is normal.” Beck said and he placed his hand on (Name)'s wrist to check her pulse.

“What’s considered not normal?” Vogel asked.

“She may have nightmares, sometimes during the night she does seem to appear to have them.” Beck explained.

“I can’t imagine that she wouldn’t, she’s been through so much.” Martinez frowned.

Beck touched her forehead, “And she might be running a fever from the looks of it.”

“Well, we’ll leave it to you for now. Remember, you’re to be having breaks throughout the day. I won’t repeat myself.” Lewis warned and Beck nodded his head.

“Yes.” And with that everyone left and Beck sat down on the chair tired. He looked at (Name)'s sleeping form in worry, the medical side of him knew that this was normal, that she was simply exhausted and that she’ll wake up soon. But he was undeniably worried that maybe something wrong could happen after she promptly passed out five days ago he’s been working himself to the bone taking care of her, making sure that she would survive while doing all the tests that NASA was telling him to do.

The list was never-ending, and he was worried about her weight the most right now. She was significantly underweight, malnourished, and it was horrifying to know that she was only days away from dying of starvation. If they had even shown up a day or two later, she might have not been there.

Tears welled up in his eyes in his seat as he grabbed her hand, holding it as tenderly as he could. He didn’t want to lose her, not on his watch. He swore to himself that he wouldn’t.


	18. The Healing Process

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (Name) has finally been rescued from her hell on Mars. Now, will she be able to survive the trip back home?

**Sol 570**

The next time I wake up I felt groggy, there’s movement in the room and I slowly open my eyes. I look to the side to see Beck tampering with the I.V bag I have next to me, “Hey, you’re awake.” He smiled as he finally noticed me.

I gave a soft smile but I closed my eyes in pain my head felt like it was being stabbed repeatedly and I felt so unnaturally cold, “How are you feeling?” He asked.

And before I could even think of a coherent response I said the first thing that came to mind, “Like jello. The green kind.”

What?

“And I see you’re delirious from the fever.” He said and I watched as he wrote something on his papers.

“Nooo…feeling like jello is normal…” I said as he helped me sit up and handed me a water bottle.

He laughed slightly, “No, I don’t think it is. Now drink this.”

My head bobbed slightly as I struggled to drink my water properly, finally, I was able to drink it without spilling it.

I don’t remember anything else that happened later.

* * *

**Sol 580**

I don’t remember much from the past ten days but Martinez and Johnson took great pleasure into explaining over my lost memories, “Like jello?” I asked frowning, “Was I high on morphine?”

Martinez and Johnson lost it. Right now, I was sitting up on the bed, everyone was here talking to me.

“You said specifically that you felt like the green kind.” Beck said and I turned to him in wonder, “I can’t remember, everything’s fuzzy.”

“Yeah, it’s understandable, buddy. You had a high fever, every time you woke you were delirious.” Martinez explained.

“Was I?” I asked and Lewis nodded, “Yup when you woke up on my watch you kept spewing out mathematical equations about plants and how they will one day take over the Earth.”

I felt my face burn in embarrassment, “Oh god…”

“I’m totally upset that I missed that one.” Martinez said as he shook his head, “When I was on watch is you talking about potatoes-“

“Nope! Gonna stop you right there! I don’t ever want to hear that word, especially right now.” I said as I pressed my hand to cover his mouth. Johnson starts cackling and before I could say something else I felt Martinez lick me.

“Ugh! Martinez, did you just lick me?” I ask as I pulled my hand away in disgust wiping it away. My nose scrunched up as I looked at him disgusted, “What are you, eight?”

“Dude, you just licked a person who had a 38 (102) degree fever!” Johnson exclaimed and I grinned when I heard the retching sounds on Martinez as Lewis shook her head in disappointment. I would have laughed if it didn’t hurt to.

* * *

**Sol 589**

And so, over the course of a few days I have been cycling between states of unconsciousness and awareness. Slowly, I had been able to stay up for longer periods before feeling drained. Granted the longest I’ve been awake for was 20ish minutes, but still, a feat no less.

Right now, Johnson was sitting next to me because he finished his work first. I wanted to ask him something but I didn’t want to make him uncomfortable, he seemed to notice my discomfort.

“Hey, what’s wrong? Do you feel alright? I can call Beck if you want.” Beck right now was taking his break, Lewis’ orders because apparently he’ll work himself down if she didn’t order him to.

“I…well...” I tried to explain and he grabbed my shoulder in a comforting gesture, “Hey I’m right here. We’re here for you.” Johnson said and I looked at him in the eyes, he was genuinely worried and wanted to help. 

“Will you be my snuggle buddy?” I blurted out quickly and looked down shamefully, “I just…I’m touched-starved and I just….” I felt tears forming and I gave a small hiccup.

“Hey, hey, hey. Don’t cry…” Johnson said quietly as he sat next to me on my bed and wrapped his arms around me being careful of my injuries. “There’s no reason to cry, hell, I can’t even begin to understand what you’ve been through on Mars all alone. If you need a snuggle buddy then I’m more than willing to be.” Johnson said gently as he wiped my tears away.

“Scoot over.” And it took a bit but after a bit of working we got into a position that didn’t irritate my ribs and not mess with all the needles and patches and medical equipment that is making sure that I’m still alive.

He started to tell me some stories and playing with my hair and slowly I was relaxing to the comfort of another human being. Something that I missed so much, and so I fell asleep.

* * *

“Johnson, you can take a break, I finally finished eating-“ Beck said as he walked into the Medbay only to walk into (Name) and Johnson laying in bed together as he ran his hands through her hair.

His blood ran cold and felt fury boil under his skin as he overwhelmed with jealousy and anger.

“Wait! Before you get any ideas, I can explain!” Johnson exclaimed, his eyes wide as he carefully slipped out of the bed.

“What were you doing with my patient?” Beck said, his voice calm and an undertone of anger. Johnson winced and held his hands up as if in surrender, “Look, I can explain. It’s not what your thinking, I swear. I wouldn’t ever do that to you, much less with (Name). She’s my best friend, nothing more.”

That seemed to calm Beck as his shoulders relaxed but he still felt the jealousy coil in his stomach.

“She woke up fifteen minutes or so and we were talking, but she seemed like she wanted to say something. She told me that she was feeling touch-starved and wanted a ‘snuggle-buddy’. So I laid her down, mindful of the wiring and the ribs and she fell asleep a minute ago. I swear that’s all that happened, you have to believe me.” Johnson begged as he looked at Beck.

Beck sighed softly, his anger diminishing now that he had the explanation. He patted down the jealous feeling and felt his head clear, “I know, I know…I just.”

“No, I get.” Johnson said with a smile, “I know how you feel about her, and walking into the situation must have shocked you.”

Beck nodded, he looked at the girl in question who was sleeping, her eyebrows furrowed, “You said touch-starved right?” He said, walking over to make sure that everything was in order and hesitantly placing his on her head. She nuzzles into it even as she sleeps and lets out a contented sigh.

“Well, I guess we can fix that up.” Johnson gave him a grin and nodded.

* * *

**Sol 600**

Today, Beck had let me get up out of bed and after 39 days laying around it was tiring work but as I held onto the bed for support as I stood it felt nice. My ribs were going to take a month to two months to heal, at least. And Beck was telling me how worried he was because I wasn’t gaining weight as much as I should. So, today was a day of testing, today Beck and the crew were going to help me move around, and Beck was going to try to give me a full ration. He wanted me to eat two of them but after eating less than that amount for over 500 days, I was a bit skeptical.

Beck and Johnson were with me today, Johnson was standing a foot away from me and Beck was hovering over me like a mama bear as he tried to help me gain balance. My legs shook from the effort slightly but slowly, I was taking small and careful steps towards Johnson.

I made it pretty far, being a step or two away until my knees buckled and falling. Before I could reach the floor, Beck grabbed on to me tightly and helped me regain my balance.

“Careful.” He warned and we repeated the process until finally, I did without losing my balance.

“You did it!” Johnson cheered as he patted my shoulder with a grin.

I gave him a gleeful grin in return even if I was super tired. Beck sat me down on the bed, he started to check on me and was measuring my heart rate, “Are you tired?” He asked.

“Yeah, it felt like a workout.” I said quietly.

“Well, it was pretty good for your first time up again, as long as you gain your weight we can begin moving around.”

Yeah, that was also a problem. My weight wasn’t changing as much as it should, I wasn’t a few days from malnourishment anytime soon but it wasn’t as close as Beck wanted it.

When he asked me if I exercised on Mars I told him that I was only stretching properly because I would lose all the calories I gained when I was working. So for the past few days he’s been telling me I would be eating rations again, now that I was getting better. But two rations seemed too much and I have no idea how I’m going to it all.

Johnson left to get the rations while Beck sat on the chair next to me writing down his evaluation for NASA.

I sat back in another world until Beck’s voice snapped me out of it, “How are you getting used to being on the Hermes again?” I squinted slightly as I thought of the answer.

“It’s a lot to take in.” I responded after a moment of consideration, “Now that I’m awake for longer periods it’s starting to settling in that this isn’t a dream. That I’m not still on Mars waiting to wake up.”

“Is that how you felt?” He asked. 

I nodded, “In the beginning, I thought that I made you all up. I was waiting to wake up, realizing I was still on Mars, still waiting to be rescued. But…it’s not. A dream, I mean, you guys actually came around to save me.”

Beck didn’t speak for a moment, “I’m still getting used to being around you guys. It’s hard…I’ve been alone for so long that it practically feels like everyone of you is a stranger. I hate it…We’re crewmates, we trained together until we knew even the little shifts in your voices or the small movements. I was always proud of myself that I could tell if anything was wrong with one of you just by one look, but now…”

I closed my eyes and rubbed my forehead, “I can’t. It’s like…everyone here, you’re strangers. I can’t tell anymore, sometimes when I talk to guys I remember your small antics but… I don’t know how to explain it, it’s different.”

It was quiet, Beck didn’t say anything and I felt myself fidgeting slightly in the tense atmosphere. It felt nice to finally get that out of my chest but I hate the fact that Beck’s not saying anything and it’s making me feel like I made a mistake pouring my feelings out like that.

I felt myself about to start shaking when I felt the bed I was dip slightly from the added weight and I looked over to see Beck sitting beside me and wrapped both of his arms around my figure in a small embrace.

My eyes widened and slowly held onto his sweater where I felt tears forming. I nuzzled my face into the crook of his neck as I let out muffled sobs as the man tried to soothe me by rubbing my back.

It felt nice, well, it was nice to have someone holding me after being in a godforsaken planet all by yourself. But I heart clenched knowing that it was Beck, the man that I loved so dearly since our time on Earth.

I felt myself releasing all the pent-up stress that I was holding in. We were in this position for a while until finally…finally, I had calmed down. And when I did, we just sat there, neither of us moved from our spots. And I felt peaceful, I felt like everything was somehow and miraculously going to be alright. Even if there that was looming unpredictability that always occurs while being in space.

But sitting here, in the arms of the man that I still had feelings for, feelings that I have long since pushed away knowing that there was that chance that I would never be able to return to him. A feeling that has kept me going since my first day being stranded on Mars.

Beck tightened his grip on me almost as if he was fearful, fearful of what I was unsure but I welcomed the embrace. This is what I needed at the moment. The comfort that only a human could give another even when there were no words shared.

“You’re here.” His voice hoarse, almost as if he too was crying. “You’re here, with us. That’s all that matters. We’re here for you and this time we _won’t_ leave you. I swear on my life.”

And it was the sincerity in his voice that tightened my airway as all the air just left my being. I blinked rapidly to avoid more tears being shed and I inhaled and gave out a pathetic, weak sound.

 _“Thank you.”_ I heard my voice speak out and I meant it from the bottom of my heart. If it wasn’t for them, risking absolutely everything I would have been stuck on that bastard planet called Mars for another three and something years. Waiting where anything could have gone wrong.

Beck slowly parted our hug and I saw that his eyes were red as he wiped away our tears, “You’re safe.”

And for the first time in a long while I gave him one of my widest smiles as I could tell that he was telling the truth.


	19. Ups and Downs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (Name) has spent her time on Mars isolated from any other existing life. Alone and working trying to get by from one day to the next. But now, she faces an even bigger challenge. Getting used to other people and resting until she's completely healed. 
> 
> This is not an easy thing for (Name) but hopefully, Doctor Beck can help her.

**Sol 610**

Slowly but surely I was making progress, every day the crew was beside me as we talked. I was healthy enough to walk from the Medbay to the rec room and the kitchen, just because most of that was me floating, but I had to have someone with me at all times. And so today after eating my ration, which was great eating solid foods for the past ten days everyone was sitting with me as we watched a movie. Everyone crowded around me and Martinez took it to himself to become my snuggle buddy for the day.

Ever since Johnson and I talked ten days ago mostly everyone became my snuggle buddy. But Vogel and Lewis refused, Lewis took her job way too seriously but she would place an arm around my shoulder and Vogel often patted my back awkwardly.

Most of the time it was Martinez or Johnson because they were my best friends. I was sure that Beck wouldn’t want to do it because of our relationship in the past but when he took care of me and no one else around he would become my snuggle buddy.

I hated the fact that I became embarrassed every time he would do it. All this time I was thinking about him and he was a huge motivator on my doing everything I could to survive Mars that now that with him a good chunk of the day has been making me feel things again.

I still loved him, I didn’t ever stop, I just pushed away my feelings because it was what _he_ wanted and it was up to me to not screw us both over when we were selected in Ares 3. But now that I’m back, back in his arms I just wish that I could tell him that I never stopped loving him. I never stopped thinking of the moments that we had together.

But he wouldn’t want that, Martinez and Lewis told me how close that Johnson and Beck had gotten while I was on Mars. A part of me felt hurt but at the same time I was happy for them. My best friend had landed himself a great guy, I was really happy for them, and it wasn’t my place to destroy that happiness.

I had seen them sharing whispers at times but I thought nothing of it until one day Martinez was with me and he had gotten that grin on his face. A grin full of mischief that I hadn’t seen for a long, long time.

“You know…before finding out that you were alive, Johnson and Beck grew _really_ close.” His eyebrows started wiggling.

“What do you mean?” I asked, laughing at the wiggling of his eyebrows.

“You know…the hush-hush and private conversations.” I gasped slightly.

“No!” I said incredulously.

“Yes.” He nodded, “I thought it was weird but they were always together. I walked by Beck’s room late at night and I could hear Johnson laughing in his room.”

My mouth was agape at the news.

“Tell her commander.” Martinez said as Lewis walked into the room.

“It’s true that those two have been closer than they have before leaving Earth.” She agreed and I still in shock.

My heart hurt knowing that the man I loved was with one of my best friends, it hurt so much but I couldn’t ruin it for them. If they were happy together than I was not going to be in their way. I was going to support them, I had already pushed my feelings away on Mars, another 200 something days was going to be easy.

* * *

“(Name)!” I jumped slightly at the loud voice and I looked to see Johnson’s face super close to mine, I pulled back immediately in shock.

“God! Why are you so close to me?!” I cried and Martinez started laughing beside me.

“Hear that Johnson, she just called you ugly.” He wheezed.

“She did not! Right, (Name) .” He asked and I looked away, “Well…” I hid my smile as he let out an anguished gasp.

“I’m not ugly!”

I started laughing, hearing my crewmates join in as Johnson defended his pride.

Finally settling down I patted his shoulder, “No worries, Johnson.” I started and he got a hopeful look on his face.

“We all know that you’re not the prettiest on the ship.” The look of utter devastation on his face had me cracking up as Martinez howled.

“We should have left you back on Mars if you’re going to act like that.” Johnson pouted and I wrapped my arms around him, “I’m sorry, I just had to.” Johnson looked at me before he smiled.

I knew that I was forgiven when he returned my hug.

Everyone finally calmed down and I sat up reaching for the water on the table. “Anyways…before that rude comment…” Johnson gave me a look, “I was trying to get your attention, (Name).”

I look at him, tilting my head slightly, “Yes?”

“You’re being quiet, you alright?” Lewis asked placing a hand on my shoulder.

“Huh? Oh, I’m fine. Sorry just kind of got caught up in my thoughts and all.” I smiled reassuringly.

“Oh, that’s not a good thing at all.” Johnson said and I knocked shoulders with him, “How dare you? I’ll have you know that there’s stuff in here, unlike yours that is most likely empty or just thinking about food.”

“What can I say? Food and I are simply soulmates.” Johnson shrugged and snickered slightly.

“Bless the happy couple.” I laughed.

Slowly everyone calmed down after my unexcused silence, “Wait, if _I’m_ not the prettiest, then who is?” Johnson asked and I looked over to him, grinning.

“Are you seriously asking me that? Of course, it’s Vogel. Look at that dashing and strapping foreigner.” I said pointing to said German who had looked up at his name being called.

“Really Johnson, can’t compare to that.”

“Hey!”

I laughed, “I’m married…” Vogel said embarrassed and I looked over to the man.

“And your wife is lucky to have you.” I winked at him and started laughing alongside everyone else as Johnson fretted and tried to convince me that he was the prettiest.

I leaned back on the seat when Martinez and Johnson started arm wrestling. I laughed as they struggled, taunting the other that they themselves were the strongest.

It was a good day.

* * *

**Sol 638**

I was eating a ration today and Lewis was the one that with me today, “(Name)…are you sure you’re alright? You just seem…different.” Lewis started, struggling to find the words.

I sighed and leaned back on my chair, seriously people need to stop asking me that. It was infuriating. It made me feel like I was incapable of doing anything, “Why do you say that?” I huffed.

“It’s just, in the past few days you’ve been quiet. I mean, quieter than usual.”

I thought back to what I was thinking about in the last few days, the news of Johnson and Beck, the reality that I’m going back to Earth, that I’m going to see my family again.

“I’m fine.” I started and Lewis gave me a pointed look.

“Okay, okay, hear me out. _I’m fine,_ Lewis. I know that you’re my CO and everything and this is protocol, especially after what has happened.” She gave me a nod.

“But, I have spent 561 sols on Mars, on my own, with nothing but my thoughts. And being with you guys, company again is taking some getting used to, alright? This is more of me struggling to get by and relearn how to act with company again. It’s not going to happen immediately, as you of course know. And I’m trying, I truly am, trying to do the best to not let it show. It’s not any of your faults, it’s the consequences, really, the after effects that I need to overcome.” I sighed.

“Not by yourself you don’t.” She said and I felt anger boiling in my stomach, “We’re here for you (Name).”

“Oh Christ, please just stop!” I said, my voice rising slightly in frustration. My hands covered my face as I tried to calm down, after a few moments I took a breath and looked at her apologetically.

“I’m sorry.” I truly meant it, “I just…have a lot on my mind. I just need to be alone, just five minutes.”

“No.” She said decidedly.

I groaned, “Please.”

“No.” The tone in her voice told me that there was no arguing.

I placed my hand on my forehead, trying desperately to think of something, “Then let me do something. Anything, I don’t care, just something to get my mind off of…of _this_.” I pleaded.

“Both Doctor Beck and NASA advised you to not do anything but lay down and rest. You are still recovering.” She looked me straight in the eyes and I felt myself bristling.

“I’m becoming restless.” I said, “I can’t just sit back, god, it’s the last thing I want at the moment.”

“No (Name). We’re pushing it with you moving around, Doctor Beck is against the idea of you even leaving Medbay to come here to eat without his supervision. I will not tolerate anything that can lead you to harms way.”

I didn’t say anything and sat back on my seat, neither of spoke a word to each other and she brought me back to the Medbay where Beck gave me a quick checkup.

“So (Name), how was lunch.”

“It was fine.” I said coldly and after he was done I laid down on the bed turning away from everyone.

"(Name)."

“I said I was fine, just…just stop it for a bit.” I begged and I could hear Lewis call Beck out of the Medbay to talk to him. During that time, I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep.

Just a little while longer.

* * *

“What happened? Why is she like this?” Beck asked, he was hurt by the cold way (Name) had responded to him. It was so unlike her.

He watched as Lewis sighed, her eyes closed as she ran a hand through her hair, obviously distressed. “That’s partly my fault.”

“What happened?” Beck asked worried.

“I just…you’ve seen how she’s been acting lately. Quiet, not speaking a word to anyone, up in her thoughts and I pushed her into trying to tell me.” She sighed.

“You what?” He asked, his eyes widened, “Why would you do that? You know she’s-“

“I know, I know. But I need to know what’s going on as you Commander-“

“She’s in a great deal of pain, both physically and mentally, forcing it out of her is going to help no one.” Beck said angrily.

“We can help her. I know we can, she just needs to trust us, Doctor.”

Beck looked at her indignantly and she continued, “And after asking to be alone for a bit and I refused immediately, she grew angry. Raised her voice at me, but I don’t care if she wants just a few seconds alone, that isn’t going to solve anything. She needs us and we have to help her.” Lewis said as she looked at the Doctor in front of her.

“Commander, with all due respect, all of us want her to talk to us again. But this-“ He points the situation at hand, “Is not how it should be dealt with. (Name) has suffered a very traumatic experience. For God’s sake she was stranded for a year and a half, all on her own with nothing to help her through it. Her mind is haywire trying to get used to a complete change.”

“Doctor-” Lewis began but Beck raised his hand.

“Comander, I know you mean well, but forcing it out of her will help no one. If anything it will cause complications where she might be unable to trust us. I don’t want her to be alone at all after everything that she’s been through but we must find a _logical_ solution to help her or else she will continue to shut us out.”

Lewis did not look happy, she looked two seconds from shouting at him before she deflated, “Alright…” She lamented.

Beck gave a nod, “How about we-” He proceeds to tell Lewis about a plan that he thought of that might help with the situation. Lewis thought it over and while not completely agreeing to it, she decided to try it out, just maybe.

Maybe it could help.


	20. A Talk With Vogel

**Sol 639**

After the fiasco of yesterday, I wasn’t at all happy with anything, I was silent and I would only give a one-word reply to anyone who spoke to me. Vogel with me at the moment after a very awkward lunch break that everyone had. I could tell that everyone was trying to cheer me up but I just wasn’t up for it.

Dammit, let me just be angry. I’m sick of pretending that everything’s all right when clearly it is not. But I couldn’t be angry at them, I wasn’t, I was angry at myself. I shouldn’t have to treat my crew like this. I don’t want to but it’s just too hard to keep being happy with so much going on.

Vogel was talking to me quietly about how he had talked to his wife and children and I couldn’t help but smile at the thought. While not knowing them personally, before being stranded on Mars I had accidentally walked in when Vogel was speaking with his family and said was amazed by how many children he had. I was going to leave immediately but Vogel introduced me to them and they were the cutest bunch of kids I’ve seen.

“Have you thought of having children, (Name)?” He asked out of the blue and I felt my face flush in embarrassment.

“Yeah, I um…it’s a little bit stupid thinking about it now.”

“What is?”

“Well, um, when I was a kid.” I laughed slightly recalling a memory, “I had to tell my teachers what I wanted to be when I grew up. And well, working with plants was up there but there was something that I wanted to be so much more, so um…I was so nervous that I had blurted out the first thing that was on my mind.” I laughed slightly, “I just yelled in front of the class that I wanted to be a mother. The class quieted down and my teacher looked like I started speaking a totally different language. I remember being so embarrassed as I sat down as everyone started laughing.”

I grinned slightly, “I was six when that happened, and everyone else was like ‘I want to be a rock star’ or a dancer, or an actor or something along those lines and here I was, yelling that I wanted to be a mother. But I don’t regret saying that, I love kids and I’ve dreamt of having my own.”

“You were six?” He asked in surprise, “Yeah, I’m a bit of a strange one.” The both of us laughed and he shook his head.

“Not that strange, (Name). It’s an admirable job.” He smiled and I felt happy that he wasn’t laughing at me.

“When I was younger I always acted like a mother, always caring for my friends. It was nice, I miss those moments.” I said sadly.

“You do act like a mother.” He said and that brought a laugh from me.

It was quiet for a moment, “How many children did you want?” He asked and I hummed slightly.

“At first I wanted three and then two. But now, and really since the last maybe five years I didn’t really care. I know I want to have children, I don’t care for the gender or much of that. I do prefer more than one, just because my sibling and I hate the thoughts of having a singular child.” I said softly and Vogel nodded.

“When my first child was born, I held him in my arms and looked to my wife and said, ‘Ja, when can we start making more.’”

I gasped before I started laughing, “That’s priceless, how did your wife react?” I asked.

“She wanted to murder me, she spent 12 hours giving birth to one, and here I was asking for more. But, it was the best decision we’ve ever made.” He said with a look of loving affection in his eyes and I nodded.

“I bet, you’re a wonderful father, Vogel.” I said, patting him on his shoulder and he gave me a smile.

“Danke.” He said and I smiled.

From there we spoke a bit more before a knock was heard and the both of us stopped mid-conversation and looked to the door to see Beck there, “Sorry to interrupt.” He smiled sheepishly and I gave him a faint smile.

“No problem, Doctor.” Vogel said. “Is everything prepared already?”

“Prepared? What’s going on?” I asked, tilting my head slightly in confusion.

“That’s a surprise.” He said and I didn’t like the look on his face when he said that.

And so standing up and having help putting on my hoodie we were off, Beck led me down a familiar route in the Hermes and after going down the ladder carefully I stared at the room around me.

I walked looking at the tables filled with dead plants on them, slowly fingering them, looking at the leaves of all the different plants that I was growing before from Sol 1. All of them were dead, some of them died from overwatering, others were killed from lack of nutrients. And some of them had seen some kind of experiment and as I looked at the paper that was filled with my crewmates handwriting I learned what happened to them.

“I’m amazed that all of you killed my plants. Honestly, rather devastated but amazed nonetheless.” I said quietly with my back towards Beck.

He let out a puff of laughter and I could basically hear him rubbing the back of his neck, something that he always did when he was nervous. “Well…” He began and I turned to look at him.

“You’re a biologist, truthfully, this disappoints me.” I pouted at him and sighing as I turned to looking at a dead plant on the table in front of me. I scoffed looking at the blatant lack of care as the man gave me pathetic excuses.

I sighed softly, saddened by the act that my crew killed my plants, my precious darlings that I was growing. I reached down to a box I had underneath the table and looked at the seeds I had stored away.

Not much, but at least if Lewis let me get back to work I could plant some new ones. Putting it back in place I turned to look at my favorite plants that I was growing, “Oh my poor Mandrakes.” I sighed solemnly.

Beck walked up beside me as I touched lightly at the dead plants. “I tried really hard to keep them alive.” Beck said softly and I nodded, “I know you did. You wrote that they were the ones that survived the longest.”

“I’m sorry, I wish I could have done more.” He apologized, “I am a biologist after all, but they’re hard to take care of.”

I snorted lightly but smiled nonetheless, “It’s alright.” I whispered but something caught my eye. “What’s that?” I asked as I pushed the dead plant away to reveal one lone tiny sprout. It was green and I stared at it in disbelief.

“It’s alive?” Beck asked astonished.

“When was the last time anyone water this?” I asked, grabbing the small clipboard I had underneath the table to see the soil I used on it.

“Three months ago, I watered the soil for when you returned.” He spoke and I looked at the paper and my hand touched the soil, It wasn’t as damp as it should to let much grow correctly but it was packed with nutrients.

“How is it possible?” Beck looked at in awe, “It’s the soil.” I explained showing it to him. “I created this in the lab before leaving for Earth, it’s specifically made to draw the remaining nutrients from any dead plants to allow other plants to grow. NASA wanted me to experiment it with Mars’ dirt to see if it could plants farmable but I never got around to do it. So with you watering it, it let the sprout grow.” I grinned, pulling the dead roots, that looked terribly small from the soil eating it. In the back there was just one single sprout.

“Beck, it’s alive!” I said excitedly, drawing him up in a hug and I couldn’t hold my excitement.

Beck laughed returning my hug with a smile.

* * *

**Sol 640**

So after the events of yesterday, Lewis allowed me to take care of my Mandrake for a total of 30 minutes and was talking to NASA into allowing me to plant my other seeds as Beck was giving me the okay to continue my work.

I ate breakfast today and immediately getting the okay from Beck I rushed to my Mandrake. Today Vogel was joining me once again and all I did was sit down on the chair after watering it and giving it more nutrients.

I stared at it in awe, fingering the stem softly to not hurt it in any way.

“Is this how it was when you grew your first plant?” Vogel asked, snapping me away from the plant.

“What?” I asked, not hearing the question.

“When you made your logs you had one that showed you crying over the first plant you grew. Is it similar?” He repeated and I thought back to that time.

“Yeah, it’s awe-inspiring. Being able to watch something that you created grow. I don’t know if I could describe it. It makes me happy. Seeing the hard work finally paying off is an amazing feat.”

“Ja, it is.” He said as I looked back at the small plant.

“I remember all I could think about at that time was, ‘Oh god, it worked. It actually worked.’ And then I started crying because it made me realize that I had a fighting chance at survival.”

“Emotional indeed.” I nodded with a small smile.

“Very emotional.” I agreed, letting out a small hum.

* * *

**Sol 641**

I was sitting in the rec room waiting for Johnson to return with a movie to watch when I let out a small cough. I would have ignored it for just being something stuck in my throat but I felt something grainy in my throat. I drank a bit of water to wash it down thinking that it might have been a part of the freeze-dried strawberry I was munching on.

“Alright, I found Jurassic Park!” Johnson exclaimed as he walked back. And placing it on the T.V where it started playing.

“Of course you would bring that.” I grinned and Johnson let out a scoff.

“Says the person who brought (Fav. Show) and (Fav. Actor) show to MARS!”

“Okay, but to be fair, it’s David Tennant!” I argued and started laughing at our childish conversation.

Johnson sat down, an arm on mine as we began to watch the movie.

* * *

**Sol 642**

“Alright, your ribs seem a lot better now.” Beck said showing my x-ray pointing to the ribs that were broken before.

“But.” He began as he sat down with a harden look, “I do not want any hard labor from you. I must stress that this is very fragile and to lay low for a while. But that being said, you can start sleeping in your room again.”

“I can?” I asked excited, not that I had any problems with the Medbay but I hate the smell of disinfected that Beck used to clean it regularly.

“Yes. If there are any problems you need to tell me immediately.” He said sternly and I nodded my head.

“No problem, Doctor!” I grinned.

A few hours passed and we had dinner together and sat in the rec room. Johnson and Martinez were playing chess. Beck was reading his medical book beside me and Lewis and Vogel were talking about something or other that I wasn’t really paying attention. I leaned back watching an old show that Lewis brought with her on her data stick.

Surrounded by the sounds of my crewmates brought a smile on my face. It was nice and peaceful again.


	21. The Good News

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (Name) learns that even in the worst situations there is good news to be spread.

I stood in the doorway of my room on the Hermes that I haven’t been in since before we got on Mars. Someone must have changed the covers on my bed because there wasn’t any sort of dust, it was clean and nothing was out of place since getting here. The box I had underneath my bed was still there, it included my laptop and anything that I brought with me from Earth when we left. But curiously there was another box as well.

Leaning down I grabbed it, I looked at it seeing that it had my name written on it with sharpie. Popping off the cover and looking at clothing in it, taking out the folded clothes, I saw letters in them some of them were from people that were cheering me on, regular people hoping that I made it to Earth okay.

Smiling at the letters I placed them next to me on the bed, going through the rests of its contents. There was a small doll, a little note ‘For the greatest astronaut to ever live. Best wishes, Mitch.’ I smiled and looked at the small doll laughing at how it shared the same features as me.

I squeezed it in my hands, thankful that Mitch got me this. The rest were letters but bulker looking envelope caught my eye. It was small, maybe a card? I looked at the front. ‘To my loving sister’

“Oh it’s (Sibling's Name)…” I smiled, I opened the letter and there was an even smaller envelope in it. But I grabbed the letter and opened it up,

_‘Dear Sister,_

_I’m happy to hear that you’re still alive and kicking on Mars. Our parents and I were absolutely devastated to hear that you hadn’t made it. But now were ecstatic to find out that you’re alive. Like really, Mom is about to jump down the stairs in joy. I wrote you this instead of waiting for a call from you in space because they aren’t sure when you’ll be healthy enough to get there so I found this quicker especially because you’re going to receive a lot of fan mail._

_Seriously, our mailbox has been flooding in with letters from people who want to talk to you. There’s more than 200 I reckon at the moment, probably going to get higher as the time passes. A lot of people are donating to us because of you, but I’m just happy to hear that you’re still alive. All of us are._

_Actually, there’s a surprise inside this envelope that I want you to open once you’re done reading this. Lucy and I are happy to share it with you._

_With all the love in the world, come back to us safely. Love you._

_P.S – Mom’s already planning a feast for when you get back with all your favorites. Love you bye!_

_Love (Sibling's Name).’_

I felt tears forming from reading the letter that my sibling wrote. Their handwriting was still atrocious. But the sense of familiarity was amazing, especially for so long. At the bottom, there were some photos, one of them was of the letters that were cluttering two boxes. Another pile was filled with what looked like checks and cash. I gave a small laugh.

The other photo was my parents and sibling and their spouse all of them smiling and holding out their hands making hearts with them. I cried even more, missing them so much. So, so much.

I looked at the smaller envelope that sat on my lap, opening it up there was a card on it, it was black with the galaxy design, there was a little picture of a Martian,

‘Auntie Nadia, will you be our Martian Godmother?’

My mouth dropped in shock as I opened the card and inside was the ultrasound of a baby inside of it.

“Oh my god…oh my god!” I exclaimed as I scrambled onto my feet. I rushed out my room and ran straight into Martinez who was presumably going into his room.

“Whoa there, where’s the fire?” He asked teasingly and the smirk on his face dropped immediately when he saw my tears. “Hey, what’s wrong?” He asked concerned as he grabbed onto my shoulders.

I started babbling, talking way too quickly and Martinez looked utterly confused.

“I have no idea what you're saying, (Name).” He said and I shoved the card into his face as I started crying out joyfully.

Martinez blinked from having something shoved so quickly into his face that he grabbed it. He was concerned with how hysterical his friend was being and then he looked at the card. It was cute with the design it had and he laughed at the Martian alien that it had, opening it up he noticed the ultrasound. His eyes widened seeing the baby and looked at the text beside it.

“Oh my GOD!!! (Name)!!!” He unknowingly yelled, grabbing onto the female who was practically vibrating with joy. “CONGRATULATIONS!!!”

That seemed to have got everyone scrambling out of their rooms as not a second later, the crew came out fearful something bad had happened. Seeing Martinez hugging (Name) who was crying and shaking was a fearful sight.

“Guys, you won’t believe it!” Martinez exclaimed holding the card in his hands. “(Name) just got the best news, ever!”

He gave the card to Lewis and the rest of the crew looked to see and were amazed.

“You’re an aunt!” Vogel smiled.

“Congratulations!” Johnson cheered hugging the said female. She nodded her head excitedly with a wide smile on her face.

“I’m gonna be a godmother!” She laughed happily.

“Correction: You’re going to be a Martian Godmother. The only one in the world.” Martinez grinned patting her on her back.

I looked at the card in amazement, crying happily and Beck gave me a pat on my shoulder with a warming smile that I couldn’t help but return.

* * *

**Sol 645**

It’s been a few days since learning the surprise that the day after I was able to call my family. My mother bursts into tears the moment she saw me, my father was shocked and my sibling had their signature grin. Their spouse holding the rather large stomach that contained the baby.

It was an emotional call, as it was the first time seeing them in so long. We talked for way longer than was allowed to but I think that was because I was a special case. I was honored to be the Godmother of my sibling. They hadn’t told me the gender and they were still picking out names. It was apparently going to be a surprise.

After talking to them and cutting the call I sat in my seat crying, missing them immensely.

But before I could think too much about it I started having a coughing fit. I was lucky to be alone and no one could hear me. I struggled to catch my breath when finally it died down after long, agonizing minutes.

I felt spit land on my hands and I looked to see my spit with small red particles? It didn’t look like but I ate some red freeze-dried strawberries so I thought that it was just that.

I got up to wash my hands and cleared my throat that hurt slightly. I thought about going to Beck to get it checked out but thought against it.

It was probably nothing.


	22. The Misunderstanding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes Beck wishes that (Name) knew his feelings. 
> 
> Sometimes Johnson wishes for his friends to get together. 
> 
> And sometimes, life is just full of misunderstandings that cause more trouble with a dash of hilarity.

**Sol 647**

When I woke up this morning I felt myself wheezing slightly. What in the world? I got up, getting dressed, feeling something in my throat I drank my water. It helped but my lungs felt weird.

I thought it was better to wait, I went to get my toolbox because NASA finally started letting me work as the repairman again for the Hermes over a week ago. I made sure to be careful of my ribs but I felt tired after lifting some boxes.

I looked at the clock seeing that Beck should already in the MedBay. I made my way there to get a check-up. As I made my way there I could hear voices. Johnson was laughing at something and looking I could see Beck getting embarrassed at whatever they were talking about.

I smiled seeing how close the two of them had gotten and I knocked on the door to not just ruin the moment.

“Excuse me?” I said, gaining their attention.

Beck dropped the tray he was holding in shock and I winced at how it clattered, “Hope I didn’t interrupt something.” I gave a small smile.

“Nah, you’re fine (Name). I need to be going anyways!” As Johnson left he gave a wink to Beck who glared at him embarrassed.

I turned to look at him, his face was red and I waited patiently for him to calm down.

“I didn’t know he was here. I wouldn’t have bothered you two if I knew.” I said apologetically.

“It’s fine…you didn’t hear what we were talking about right?” He asked shyly and I shook my head. Nope, I could understand why he was acting like this, he probably thinks that no one knows.

“No, I just heard Johnson laugh when I came. Didn’t hear a word.” And he nodded, grateful.

“Is there something wrong?” Immediately he shifted into doctor mode and I sat down on the bed.

“Today I was wheezing when I woke up.” I started.

“Wheezing?”

“Yeah, just slightly though. But I drank something and it went away but when I was lifting some boxes my lungs started hurting. I came here to see if you could check.” He grabbed his stethoscope, placing it on me to hear anything.

After a moment he spoke, “You definitely have something going on. You said this happened when you were moving around?” He asked and I nodded.

“Do you think that it might be because I’ve been working again? I mean, I haven’t really done anything too strenuous until last week.”

He hummed slightly, “It might. How heavy were the boxes?” He asked.

I thought back, “Not that heavy, maybe a kilo or so. Yesterday, was the first day I started moving them.”

“Then it could be that. Just be careful from now, your body is still healing.” He warned and I nodded.

“I will be!” I stood up from the bed, walking to the ladder when I remembered. Turning around I caught his attention, “Oh, I forgot. Congrats on getting together with Johnson. You’re super cute together.” I laughed as I made my way back to my station.

* * *

Beck stood frozen in his spot as he stared at the spot Nadia was just a second ago.

What? Johnson? Congrats?

His brain scrambled to understand what the female just said before horror washed over him like a bucket of ice water. No! She thinks…Johnson and he were together?

He thought back to the scene that Johnson and he were before (Name) came.

“You gotta tell her.” Johnson said. “She’s been back for two and a half months now.”

“I will…I just…” He couldn’t think of a way to finish his statement.

“Tell her.” Johnson repeated, “You do love her, right?”

“Of course I do! How could you possibly think otherwise?” He asked insulted that Johnson thought that.

“If you tell her now then you could be the Godfather.” Johnson teased and Beck flushed at the thought. Johnson laughed at his friend's embarrassed state and he was about to say something back when a small knock caught their attention.

“Excuse me?” The voice of said female that they were talking about appeared and Beck wanted to die that she could have heard what they were saying.

“Oh no…” Beck said quietly, she’s totally misunderstood the situation. “Oh god…” She thought that he was in a relationship, with Johnson.

After spending time mulling over the new discovery he went to find Johnson. He found him in the gym, “We have a problem.” He said earning the hacker's attention.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, removing the earbuds he had. He continued jogging, looking at the distressed doctor beside him.

“(Name)…she-” He began and Johnson turned to look at him more seriously, “She thinks that _we’re_ in a relationship.” He explained moving his hands between them.

“What?!” Johnson then proceeded to slip on the machine and falling into Beck’s arm who caught him.

“When she was leaving the Medbay she congratulated me for getting together with you.” He said harshly, trying to get Johnson to stand up correctly.

“Why in the world would she say that?” He asked and before either one could continue.

“Johnson do you still have my data stick?” A voice said as the door opened. It was (Name), holding a tablet in her arms and she froze as she looked at the scene in front of her.

“Oh god! I’m so sorry! I didn’t know you guys were having a moment. I’ll leave right now!” And promptly ran away.

The two males were so shocked that Beck dropped Johnson to the floor, both of them speechless.

“Oh god, she actually thinks we’re in a relationship…” Johnson said horrified. “Oh god…”


	23. Trouble On the Hermes

**Sol 660**

In the past few days, Johnson and Beck have been worrying over something and I told the both of them the truth, “Look, I won’t say anything to anyone else about what I saw. No worries! I’m happy for the both of you! I just suggest to not do it in front of the others. You know how Martinez is.”

After that, I actively tried to avoid them, not wanting to ruin another moment of theirs. And so today I was working with Martinez. It was around lunch time so we decided that it would be a good time for a break.

I was exhausted today, I kept coughing and the tightness in my chest was easing. It wasn’t until I made it into the kitchen area when I started feeling like I was struggling to breath.

“(Name), you okay?” Martinez asked and I started coughing uncontrollably I fell onto my knees, my hands coming to my throat at the lack of oxygen that I needed. I felt like I was suffocating.

“(NAME)!” Martinez screamed in horror and fell beside her seeing that she coughed up some red sludge. She was wheezing like an asthmatic that he scrambled to the phone.

“Beck to kitchen, STAT!!” He yelled as he went over to the woman on the ground still coughing. She coughed up more of that red sludge before Beck came rushing in with his medical bag.

The last thing I could recall was seeing Beck rolling me over after coughing and the rest of the crew behind him. There were black spots in my eyes before I passed out.

* * *

“(Name)? (Name)!” Beck yelled as the girl passed out, she was breathing heavily and wheezing.

“What happened?!” Lewis asked.

“I don’t know!” Martinez said, “When came down here she had a coughing fit and coughed up that!” He pointed to a pile of red sludge on the ground.

“What is that?” Johnson asked horrified.

“We gotta get her to the Medbay!” Beck yelled and that seemed to set everything in motion as they transferred the woman who was struggling to breathe to the Medbay. As soon as they got there Beck grabbed the oxygenator to make sure that she was getting oxygen.

“Is she having an asthma attack?” Lewis asked worriedly.

“No. But I think something is blocking her airways. Whatever she coughed up is causing this. I need a chest X-Ray to confirm anything and some blood samples.” He shooed everyone out of the room as he went to work.

Getting the from the machine he could see that the airways were inflamed and something was stuck in there.

* * *

**Sol 667**

Slowly I came to, the first thing I felt was the cool sensation and the smell of pure oxygen. The next thing I realized was the sound of the machine whirring somewhere beside me. I felt about thirty needles stuck in me and the I.V bag hanging above me.

I couldn’t move, my chest ached in pain and all I could do was twitch my fingers slightly moving my head to the left.

“Guys, I think she’s waking up!” A voice beside me said quickly and I shut my eyes at the loud voice.

“(Name)…(Name), can you hear me?” Another joined and moved my hair from my hair. It felt familiar. Slowly I opened my eyes squinting at the bright lights in my face before I saw the face of the Beck in front of me.

He looked terrible, one of the largest bags under his eyes, and he looked plain exhausted.

“Beck…?” I asked softly, my voice hoarse.

“We’re all here, (Name).” Another voice said and I looked over to see Johnson sagging in relief.

“W-What happened?” I asked I can’t remember how I got here.

“You passed out.” Martinez said, “Gave me a freight when it happened.” He smiled worriedly.

I went to speak but being annoyed with the oxygen mask in the way I tried to remove it.

“No, you can’t take it out.” Beck warned slapping my hands lightly as I tried to get it off of me. “You need it right now.”

I gave him a look, my puppy-dog eyes, letting out a whimper when he removed my hands from touching the mask.

The crew could see his willpower deflate at the look the female shot him but stood strong. “No, you need it. You had Martian dirt clogging your bronchial tubes from inhaling it when you were on Mars. It left your airways small and with the movements you were doing caused you to pass out from the lack of oxygen.” He explained, “I don’t want you touching it because your lungs can’t stand being somewhere you don’t have plenty is going to be harmful.”

I sighed, “Great. I’m off of Mars and it’s still trying to kill me.” I tried to lighten the mood and it seemed to work. Martinez and Johnson snorted slightly, Lewis and Vogel cracked a smile and Beck smiled softly letting out a puff of laughter.

“You know, we really thought the hard part was over already.” Johnson said as he sat beside me on the bed. I turned to look at him before giving a little grin that was hiding under the mask.

Ignoring Beck about my oxygen mask I pulled it down with a small grin, “Are you kidding? I haven’t had a potato in three months. Now that’s a victory right there.” I rolled my eyes placing my mask back on before Beck shoved it my face.

But that seemed to work because Johnson started cackling and the room resonated with laughter.

After a few moments, it took for the crew to stop Martinez wiped away a stray tear, “Don’t worry buddy, when we get back to Earth you’ll have a lot more options.”

“God I hope so. I’m sick of our rations.” I grimaced slightly.

We spent our time together, more with me listening than anything because I was exhausted.

Slowly everyone left, starting with Vogel who needed to check on the ship and that we were not going to fly into the sun anytime soon. Lewis left after stating that she was going to report NASA along with the tests Beck had taken me while I was unconscious. Martinez left saying that he was next to call his family and assured me that he was going to say hi for me. Johnson sat on the seat next to Beck.

“Don’t worry (Name), I’ll make sure that I’ll bring the chessboard tomorrow so you won’t be stuck here with boring Beck and his mice all over again.” Johnson said and I laughed slightly at that. Beck hit him the shoulder, “I am _not_ boring and the mice are my experiment.” He stated angrily.

Johnson laughed and I could only watch their cute interaction. “Alright, alright, I’ll bring in the chessboard because I don’t Beck isn’t allowing me to bring in our laptops to watch a movie.” Johnson sighed sadly ignoring the glare that Beck shot at him.

I nodded my head think that it’d be nice to play chess again, “We haven’t played since we left Earth.”

“I know! That’s what I was thinking!” Johnson quipped happily, “And this time I won’t let you win. I’ve been practicing with Martinez just for this moment.”

I smiled knowing that he had indeed been practicing.

“Anyways,” Beck cleared his throat, “There’s something that we need to tell you.”

My eyes looked between the two men in front of confused and slightly nervous, “What is it?”

“Well, Beck told me about your…history, when you were back on Mars-” Johnson started off and my eyes immediately widened as I stared at Beck in shock. I struggled to get up and used my elbows to sit up slightly pulling off my mask so I could be heard correctly.

“Wait, if this has to do with anything with your present relationship together you need to hear me out first.” I said quickly looking at the two men, “I meant what I said before about you two. I didn’t think anyone was going to find out about ‘that’ but I can promise you that I’m not going to get in the way. I swear, I’m not that kind of person, if you two are happy together than that’s alright.” I was sincere, I really was.

I felt awful that they thought I would ruin their relationship together because of our history. I would never do that, to anyone.

“That’s not what he meant.” Beck said, his voice slightly raising. I stared at him in shock for a bit, “Me and Johnson _aren’t_ together.”

My mouth dropped and my eyes widened even more.

“I don’t know how you ever came to that conclusion (Name), but that’s exactly what we wanted to talk about. Me and him are not together in any way other than being crew members and friends. We don’t have close feelings for each other.” Johnson repeated with a nod of his head.

I fell back on the bed in shock, “B-But…the two of you were always together.” My eyebrows furrowed slightly, “And Martinez and Vogel and Lewis they were telling me that you guys had gotten close. Martinez has heard you two in Beck’s room laughing and talking in the late and early hours when no one was around. And Lewis saw you guys being closer than usual at times.”

“Wait, so the whole crew thinks this?!” Johnson remarked in shock.

I nodded my head, “Oh my god! Seriously?!”

I looked between the two, “I don’t understand, if you guys aren’t together ‘together’ than why have you two been acting so weird?” I asked.

Johnson looked straight at Beck for that one, I would have said something else but I felt dizzy for the lack of air. My eyes were closing and it seemed that Beck noticed because the next thing I know was he was pushing the mask onto my face once more. He tried saying something but I fell asleep.

* * *

“Dammit! I told her not to remove it.” Beck was worried after everything that had happened with (Name) on Mars and suffering. He thought that she would finally be alright being in the Hermes, how wrong was he to think that all the problems would be solved so easily.

He had to deal with her physical and emotional trauma, and he tried desperately to make it easier on her, he didn’t want to see her in any kind of pain anymore. Not when she suffered through so much. And now nearly three months after leaving Mars that blasted planet was still trying to take her away from him. When she had collapsed because her lungs were failing it felt like a nightmare.

All he wanted was her to be safe, safe with him again. But then as if that wasn’t bad she thought that Johnson and himself were dating. That was a whole new set of nightmares that he didn’t know how to act for.

All he ever wanted to do since getting he back is to hug her so tightly that she wouldn’t able to leave him and to be able to kiss again. He loved her so much, he never stopped and to think that she believed something outrageous as that made him sick to his stomach. It felt like the whole world wanted to go against him, everything seemed out of place he _couldn’t_ get it back in place.

“You have to tell her.” Johnson said behind him and his shoulder sagged from their tense state. “You have to tell her Beck. She’s confused and she won’t understand until you finally man up and tell her your goddamn feelings.”

“I know it’s just…” He was scared; petrified was more the word that he was looking for.

“No, don’t give me that. You were scared when we were on Mars and we were aborting the mission. All of us were terrified when she was blown away. We spent so much time thinking that she was dead, we were devasted with the knowledge. You faced so much and you’re still scared. Beck we got her back! We finally got her back after all of this are you sure you want to lose her because you're _scared?_ ”

Beck took a deep breath, “I’ll tell her.” He stated. “I’m going to tell her when she wakes up.”


	24. The Confession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After 668 Sols, Beck and (Name) confess their feelings.

**Sol 668**

I slowly awoke to having the oxygen mask lying uncomfortably on my face as it continued to give me oxygen. The machine was loudly in a seemingly quiet room. I rubbed my hands over my eyes trying to get rid of the sleepiness that was clinging onto me.

There was some shuffling somewhere nearby and I blinked to see Doctor Beck standing over me, “Good morning…” I croaked tiredly and he gave me a smile.

“Good morning.” He replied helping me sit up and handed me some water that I gladly took, my mouth was dry from the oxygen. As I sipped on my water he sat on the chair next to me giving me a check-up.

“(Name) about last night…” He began, his cheeks reddening slightly and I looked over at him. I want to know what he was going to say. He opened his mouth a couple of times trying to think of the right words to say and before he could say anything the hatch to the Medbay opened up surprising us.

“(Name), you awake buddy?” Martinez’s voice rang out and I looked over to the man who had walked in.

“Is she alright Beck?”

To be fair, Beck looked miffed and very embarrassed from where he was standing. “Yes.” He said and I could tell that he was annoyed. He walked away as Martinez sat in the chair beside me.

“How about we play some chess?” He asked with a grin that I couldn’t refuse.

As he sat up the board I could feel Beck’s eyes on me and I felt bad that I had to ignore it. Martinez was babbling on about the talk he had with his wife and how his son ended up trying to get the cookies. We shared a nice and pleasant conversation with Beck giving his own remarks now and then but the game we were having was anything but.

We were having such a serious match, both of us trying to beat the other. We had a number of our pawns taken, my rook was taken and so was my knight, but I had taken both his bishops and knight. It was his turn and twice now has Martinez motioned his hand to make a move only to stop. I waited patiently as I stared at the board trying to plan my moves.

He finally decided to move his queen and I saw a chance, “Checkmate.” I said moving my piece feeling victorious.

“Aww man.” He sighed sitting back on the chair, “I thought I had you on that one.”

I grinned slightly, “It was close. If you hadn’t moved your queen I would have most likely lost.”

Martinez nodded, “Another round?”

“Sure.” I said and we set up the board again. And yet again the intensity was back. This might have been my longest match with Martinez. We only had a few pieces left, and it was a standstill, I had my pieces guarding my King and my Queen was out and about taking away any pieces I could.

“Checkmate!” I cheered as I finally beat Martinez.

“Dammit…” He groaned and I was filled with giddy.

“Alright, you two had your fun but our patient needs to get her rest.” Beck said and I laid down on the bed as Martinez sighed.

“Alright, you might have won this round but it won’t last long (Name). I _will_ beat you one of these days.” Martinez said resolutely and I grinned.

“I can’t wait.”

Martinez left with the chessboard on hand leaving me and Beck in silence in the Medbay. I looked over at him and a second later our eyes locked. Neither of us spoke a word as we just stared at one another.

Beck let out a long sigh before he walked over to beside my bed until he promptly sat down on the seat that Martinez sat in before, “Hey.” He smiled at me, “How are you doing?”

I let out a puff of laughter as I answered truthfully, “Pretty alright. I still can’t believe that I’m alive.” I instantly regretted my word choice when the smile that was on his face disappeared instantly.

Beck took my hand gently into his and I felt my heart skip a beat when he started rubbing his thumb across my knuckles. He looked at me with a sad smile, “I’m so happy you’re here (Name). After everything that happened, I don’t know what I would do. It was all my fault that you were left on Mars. I’m so sorry.”

“No, you’re wrong.” I tried but he shook his head and his eyes were watery as they stared into my own.

“No, (Name), I’m so sorry.” He apologized.

“Beck, I want you to listen to me.” I started, looking at his tearful face and sat propped up with the bed inclined, “I should have died on Sol 18, or when I blew myself up, or when all my potatoes died, or even the stupid goddamn launch that NASA made me be in on the MAV.”

Beck laughed quietly at that one and I gave him a smile, a smile that only reserved for him when we were back on Earth, “Or Just about how Mars is still tried to kill me even now. It’s a gift that you guys came back for me, that I actually lived long enough to see you again. It could the gods or just luck that gave me this chance. But it’s a fucking miracle to think that you still have feelings for me.” 

I grabbed his shirt tightly pulling him close and I kissed him on the lips. My heart was hammering in my chest and I could feel how he had stiffened from the shock before kissing me back. A small moan coming from him as I bit his bottom lip gently as I moved my hand to his hair tightening my grip on his soft locks. My stomach was doing backflips as Beck moved closer, a hand resting next to me on the bed as the other cradled my cheek.

I pulled away gasping for breath, “I still love you, Chris. I never stopped either.” I said panting looking at him in his eyes. “I love you so much.” I whispered.

His blue eyes were wide as they stared at my own before a sob escaped his lips, “I love you so much. So much. I never stopped…” His breathing hitched. “I never thought I would be able to kiss you anymore after the mistake I made when we broke up. After you broke up with me all I wanted to do was tell you that I loved you and that no one else would ever take your place. I swore to myself that after we came home from Mars I would beg for your forgiveness, but then you were stranded and I felt like a whole part of myself was taken away. Finding out that you were still alive had me over the moon but left with this horrible ache because I was the one who made the call that you were dead.”

I cupped his face in my hands, “Beck…” I whispered wanting his to stop crying but he only shook his head.

“And (Name), I want you to know that if you accept my feelings once again.” He looked up at me, “I swear to never let you go again. We can live together again and…and…I’ll never let you out of my sight again. So will you…will you be with me once more?” He asked terrified as if I would ever reject him.

Tears started flowing down my cheeks and I threw my arms around him and hugged him as tight as I could. This is what I’ve been dreaming of when I was still on Mars. “Yes.” I whispered, my voice full of emotions that nearly overwhelmed, “Yes. I love you so much.”

“I love you too. So much.” Beck whispered into my ear as his hand ran through my hair slightly and we separated enough where we could share one more kiss.

Mars might have been the reason that we broke up, but it’s also the reason that Beck and I got back together. And this time, we’d never let each other go. We managed to survive the ordeals on Mars and I’m sure we can survive the ordeals that Earth has awaiting us.

I’m sure of it.


	25. The Future

**Day 1:**

Coming home was the biggest event of the century apparently, my name was famous, my story was legendary. And yeah, that was pretty amazing but the euphoria that hit me the second I got off the Hermes and stood on the pavement for the first time in nearly four years was like a tidal wave that just crashed into me. There were people everywhere, reporters, NASA employees, family members.

Oh god, I literally ran to my family when I spotted them. They were crying, there was my mom, my dad, my sibling, and their spouse. All of our arms were outreached as we hugged each other, my mother was crying the hardest as she sobbed.

My brain couldn’t catch up that this was still happening, that I made it. I finally made it Earth. But the rapid beating of my mother and father’s hearts was proof enough that not only were they alive but so was I.

I don’t know how long we just clung to each other. All of us speaking incoherently with such a touching moment, all of us sobbing with relief.

Knowing that I was alive.

I was _home. Finally Home._

Slowly we separated from each other and that’s when I noticed the baby girl that my (Sister/Brother)-in-law had in their arms. My attention was immediately drawn to her and my sibling wrapped an arm around their spouse as the two of them gave me smiles.

“Meet your niece, (Name).” My sibling said.

“Meet, (Name).” (Sister/Brother)-in-law spoke and my breathing hitched.

“She has the same name as me…” I whispered breathlessly.

They looked at each other as they nodded their heads, “We named her after you because you’re a hero. Because you represent the hope that we all had.”

I started sobbing and there was another round of hugs just cherishing each other after being separated for so long.

After the reunion with our family, the crew and I were brought to separate rooms to undergo the usual examinations to make sure that we were all sane and alive after the long voyage in space. But mine had to definitely be the longest because I was stranded on a planet for so long.

I made it this far, I wasn’t going to give up the minute I reached my goal.

As I left the examination room I spotted Beck standing outside and as soon as he saw me his arms wrapped me up in a hug. He kissed my cheek and nuzzled into me and a smile overcame my face.

I feel like I can face the world.

* * *

~TimeSkip~

I was standing outside feeling the light breeze hit across my skin, I inhaled deeply as I stood outside looking up at the sky. It was blue with clouds rolling through them so unlike the sky on Mars where everything was a Red Hell.

I can’t believe that it’s been a year and a half since I’ve returned to Earth. It felt like only yesterday I was desperately trying to survive the next day, solving problem after problem to return back home.

I was so lost within my thoughts that I never heard the door open behind me until two arms wrapped around my swollen stomach and a head leaned down over my shoulder and pressed a small kiss on my cheek.

“Good morning, love.” Christopher Beck, my husband for a year and five months greeted me as he nuzzled into my neck. His hands pressed my stomach that was enlarged from the baby I was carrying.

“Good morning, Chris.” I spoke lovingly as I leaned into his chest.

“Up early again, I see.” He spoke and I could feel the smile on his face and I nodded my head. “How’s the little one?” He asked as he caressed my stomach lightly that I giggled softly when our baby kicked.

“Fine, they’re a little needy though.” I said as I lowered my hands over Chris’ intertwining our fingers. I looked down to see our wedding rings glimmering and the fond memory of Chris proposing came to mind.

It had been a month since all of us returned to Earth and the crew and I were going to have a dinner party. After the hell that I had gone through on Mars, I was happy to spend the night with the crew. It would be the first time seeing each other since our return and we laughed and ate and had a great time until Beck who was sitting nervously in his seat stood.

He gave this long speech declaring his love for me before he kneeled in front of me, “I’ve been wanting to do this for so long now and I cannot _wait_ any longer. It has been a month since all of us returned and I know this is late but…will you marry me?”

I cried happily as I nodded my head quickly and the smile he gave me was as dazzling then I’ve ever seen it as he hugged me. The two o f us kissed as he placed the engagement ring where it belonged as we stared at one another.

We paid no mind to the cheering of the other patrons of the restaurant at least not until our friends started yelling out.

“Took you long enough!” Martinez called out.

“It took you a month?!” Johnson asked, “I would have proposed to her the day we landed on Earth!”

“It did take you a long time to ask, Beck.” Lewis agreed and the two of us looked at each other and laughed.

Even if it took a long time, the wait was worth it.

* * *

As I stood with my back to my husband I quickly turned and hugged him, “I love you.” I sighed happily and Chris wrapped his arms around me.

“I love you too. (Name).”

And this time, it was enough.

**{End}**


	26. The End

Hello, darlings~! It's happened again, we're at the end of 'Bring Her Home' and I still can't believe it!! Wow, I never imagined posting this story but now that I have I'm still amazed with how many people have read it and favorited it. Thank you so much everyone, I'm so glad you liked my fanfiction. 

I hope that this story was enjoyable for you guys. I was reading comments the other day (this is crossposted on archive of our own) and they made me so happy. I'm so glad that all of you found this story and took the time to complete it. I hope the ending wasn't too rushed, I really liked the ending as Beck and (Name) having started their own family. 

I was thinking of some different prompts like, '(Name)'s Wedding Scene', or '(Name)'s First Day as a Teacher' or something along those lines. If you guys are interested let me know, if I get some suggestions I'll write something for you guys. 

But this is the end of the main story of 'Bring Her Home' unless there are some prompts that brings it to the end of this book and I can't tell you how thankful I am to the people who stuck around!! Thank you so much everyone!! I hope you guys enjoyed the time in this story. 

Goodbye and I hope you guys stay classy~~~


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